A Second Chance
by WellMadeMistake
Summary: One reckless night together led to many years apart. A chance meeting rekindled a flame that sat smoldering all this time, but is it really possible to pick up where they left off? Cont of o/s, M for language and citrus. Featured on TheTwilightAwards
1. Ah, memories

First off, Hi! thanks for taking a look. Secondly, this is a continuation of my one-shot "The One that got Away," if you haven't read that you should definitely start there because this story begins right where that one ends. There is exposition in that story that will be fairly important here. Go on... I'll wait... Thirdly, now that we've all read the backstory I must admit that I am a diehard hockey fan and this story is, of course, about a professional hockey player. You don't necessarily have to be a hockey fan to follow this fic, but who doesn't love a big, strong, sweaty man? I mean, really. But being that I am a fan, along the way I may make references to sports terminology or players but I will always add references in the a/n to clarify so that everyone is on the same page. All that said, I hope you enjoy!

**I do not own Twilight, but hot hocky players are all mine. ALL OF THEM =)**

**Playlist: Do You Believe by The Cardigans**

* * *

><p><strong>BPOV<strong>

"Yes, I'll be there. Thanks Mike."

Isabella Swan hung up the phone in her office as the floor secretary, Jessica, breezed through her door.

"Was that Mr. Newton?" she asked, setting a steaming cup of English tea onto Isabella's desk.

"It was. He's still sick, I'm afraid."

"Wow that must be one hell of a case of food poisoning. Where was it that he ate again?"

"Someplace over in Koreatown he said."

"I'll put in an order for some 'Get Well' flowers from the floor. Should I call and forfeit his spot in the poker tournament tonight?" Jessica asked innocently.

"No!" Isabella practically shouted. "No," continuing on more calmly, "That's actually what we were just discussing. I'll be taking his place. So I will need you to call the sedan service and change the reservation. Have them at my house at 6. My address should be in your rolodex."

"No problem, anything else?"

"No, that should do it. Thanks for the tea, Jessica. You're a lifesaver."

"It's what I do," she said with a sweet smile and a flip of her shoulder length blonde curls.

Isabella chewed on her lip thinking about that evening. The Campbell for Kids* poker tournament was going to be a Who's Who of the sports community in Chicago; from sports casters to team owners and athletes from various Chicago teams and notable people who called Chicago home, _perhaps_ including but not limited to, a certain 6'4" power forward hockey player by the name of Cullen.

Their last interaction had been… _explosive_ to say the least. All she had wanted was an interview. What she'd ended up with was a buttonless blouse, torn panties, and the most incredible sex story of her life, not to mention a standing dinner date. But things were complicated between them. As amazing as their encounter had been, in hindsight she saw how foolish she had behaved. Of course she chastised herself for those thoughts, reminding herself that she was no longer young and naïve and she was fully capable of having sex with any man of her choosing as she saw fit.

Regardless, Edward seemed different somehow, like she needed to tread lightly with him and bring back some of the caution of her younger years. She had been around athletes for years, both in college and at the professional level, and had made it a rule for herself to never date any of them. A sort of "Don't shit where you eat" kind of philosophy. Despite their history and subsequent intimate encounter, she wasn't ready to throw that rule aside just yet, not even for him.

It's not that she didn't want him, she did. She couldn't stop thinking about him and there inlay the problem. She had lived her entire adult life depending on no one but herself to survive and it scared her to feel like she couldn't breathe at the mere thought of him. It's not that she was opposed to tying herself to someone, she felt the effects of loneliness at times just like everyone else. The problem was that she was afraid to let herself fall for someone, to depend on them as much as she depended on herself. Though she had reached her goal and was comfortable in her dream job with every potential for future success, she couldn't shake her old insecurities. She simply could not outrun the ever present need for delayed gratification because _surely_ something bigger and better was coming along and when it did she wanted to be free to move on.

That's not to say that she hadn't dated since the first time she and Edward were together. She needed something, or someone to keep her thoughts from wandering back to _him_. There had been Tyler, her chemistry partner from sophomore year with whom she had had incredible chemistry but had fizzled out quickly. Then there had been Eric, whom she had met at a bar near campus and had dated for several months until he transferred from Northwestern to Stanford. Then there had been a bit of a self imposed dry spell to get her head straight before graduation. And then there had been James.

Isabella met James Wesson while at a journalism conference in New York the fall after she graduated from Northwestern. He was a 26 year old satirist working for the New Yorker who had made a name for himself by writing a series of pieces on the mysterious British graffiti artist, Banksy*. He was at the conference to lead a panel discussion of the influence of social media on modern journalism when she first laid eyes on him. The first thing she noticed when she entered the forum was the fact that he was gorgeous; truly and undeniably gorgeous. His hair was pulled back into a long, sandy ponytail and, despite the professional attire of the conference, was clad in a pair of well worn jeans and a snug fitting t-shirt. Many of the women at the conference had taken quite an interest in his panels for reasons that had nothing to do with the topic of discussion.

Isabella was interested solely in what he had to say and less about what he looked like, though his good looks were undeniable. She knew she wanted to make a career out of sports reporting, and though she was overjoyed to land a job as a staff sports writer for the Chicago Sun Times right out of college, she wasn't one to rest on her laurels. She knew that she needed insight into the ever changing world of digital media if she ever wanted to achieve her eventual goal.

James, on the other hand, seemed to be very interested in Isabella's looks. He locked his stare on her the moment she walked in the room. She felt it, of course, but tried not to let the intensity of it get the best of her. As she offered feedback in the discussion, she hoped that his piercing looks meant that he saw some sort of potential in her. What she hadn't expected was for him to pull her aside after the panel and ask her out for drinks later that evening. She thought at first that it could be seen as unprofessional if she accepted, but then decided that since she lived in Chicago and he lived in New York, there was no harm in joining him for a drink. At the very least she'd have an opportunity to pick his brain a bit more.

That evening, Isabella entered the upscale hotel bar wearing a candy apple red halter dress and matching heels to meet with the handsome man wearing an all black suit with no tie. Over wine, they talked more about James' opinions on how the printed word was falling out of favor with consumers and how it was necessary to adapt to the changing times or they would live to see their profession die out. Eventually their conversation became less about James and what he thought about a multitude of topics and shifted to Isabella and what she did for a living. She tried to ignore the obvious look of sarcastic amusement when she told him she wrote a sports column.

"Isabella sweetheart," he said pompously, "you could be doing so much more with your talents. Sports? The only thing lower on the journalistic totem pole is celebrity gossip."

"Don't you see, though? Sports are becoming more accessible to all income levels. People from across the socioeconomic spectrum have a team that they root for, so why should we dumb things down for those who may not have as high of an education level as others? Don't you think we would then be alienating another faction of our consumer base? Why not use something as accessible and as inherently _American_ to reach Middle America and elevate them, inspire them to think outside of what's in front of them. Isn't that our job, to inspire?" she argued passionately.

He reached across the table to grip her hand where it lay on the dark finished wood.

"Why don't you let me help you? I know plenty of people who could use someone with your level of conviction and we can apply it where it will truly make a difference." He flashed her a smile that she was sure was meant to be encouraging, but really came off smug.

"Actually , I very much enjoy what I do and I find that my passions are exactly where they're supposed to be. Though I appreciate your offer for help, I think I'll continue my own way, thank you." Deeply wounded by his words and his patronizing offer, she felt inadequate in her field for the first time. She stood from her chair and extended her hand to him across the table to bid him goodnight when something on the television over the bar behind him caught her eye.

A hockey game had come to a close and a petite woman wearing a smart looking suit was standing next to a hulking man with jade green eyes. He had to bend down considerably to speak into the microphone she was holding but he was smiling and didn't seem to mind. His hair was dark with sweat and sticking out at odd angles. The TV was muted so she couldn't hear what was being said, but when a headline appeared at the bottom of screen it all became clear.

_Rookie Edward Cullen scores game winning goal in professional debut. _

And there he was, the one she'd been running from displayed in all his handsome glory for the entire world to see. Her heart swelled with pride and happiness for him, the man she once knew – sort of. But as it swelled a deep crack long ago repaired and patched with the company of other men threatened to break wide open again.

"I know a fantastic place for your passions," James said softly as he took her extended hand in his own and gently pulled it to his lips.

She pulled her gaze away from the television screen and looked down at the long haired writer brushing his lips across her knuckles. His wide, round eyes were blue but she wished they were green. She wished so hard that it made her chest ache.

"Isabella, you don't really want to go now do you? Why don't we continue this conversation in my suite?" he asked smoothly.

Unable to trust her own voice, she nodded and prepared herself to strengthen the repair on her heart with yet another man who meant nothing to her but kept her mind from wandering to _greener_ pastures.

"Miss Swan?" Jessica's voice through the intercom jolted Isabella out of her thoughts.

"Yes?"

"The car has been booked and the organizers of the tournament have been notified to expect you instead of Mr. Newton."

"Thank you, Jessica."

**EPOV**

_Stick side…_

…_glove side_

_Stick side… _

… _glove side_

"Glove side," he muttered under his breath as he let the puck fly toward the net in a hard forehand shot. The thick rubber disk sailed forward, bisecting the space between the leg and glove of the goaltender standing prone in front of the net and landing with a heavy thud on the ice inside it.

"Holy fuck, Eddie boy! I'm glad you're with us. You're the only one who can get past me," the hulking goaltender laughed as he pulled himself to his feet and righted himself on his skates.

"Indeed Cullen, good work out there. Looks like you're out of the running to be this month's mustache boy," Coach Banner patted him on the shoulder as he glided back to the bench.

"Mustache boy?" the recent trade from Dallas, Garrett Lafleur asked Edward as he came to rest on the bench.

"We have a team shoot out once a month, whoever is the last to get past Mac has to grow a mustache for the month," he answered pleasantly.

Edward and Garrett watched as the goaltender, Emmett McCarty did jumping jacks in front of the cage to distract the next player's shot.

"You will never get this!" Mac shouted dropping the puck from where it landed in his glove and puffing his chest out at team member, Jasper Whitlock. "Not a chance in hell, Jazz!"

Jasper made a lewd hand gesture at his friend and goalie before skating back to the end of the line.

"Take some notes, Lafleur. Coach is being nice by letting you sit this one out, but you definitely don't want to be mustache boy on your first time out," Edward laughed, clapping his new teammate on the shoulder.

After several more rounds, McCarty began to get lazy and let a few more shots through eventually leaving Whitlock as the one left to leave his upper lip unshaven for the next month.

"It's alright Jazz, they'll have to get the camera up real close for anybody to notice your peach fuzz lip pubes anyway," McCarty joked followed by a chorus of "ooh"s and laughter as the team filed into the dressing room after that morning's skate.

"I like what I'm seeing guys, that's for damn sure. We're on an 8 game streak and I honestly and truthfully could not be happier with the kind of hockey we've been playing," Coach Banner stood in the center of the dressing room to address his players. "I just need you guys to not get complacent. You're hungry, I can see it and so can every other team in the league. They're comin' for you, you know that. You just have to keep one thing in mind: 9 is better than 8. Enjoy the next 24 hours off, gentlemen. I'm going to need you at your best if we're going to take one on the road in Vancouver."

The team cheered as they stripped off their sweaty pads and equipment before hitting the showers.

"So Cullsy, any big plans for your day off?" Mac asked as he turned the warm spray of the shower onto himself.

"Going back to Chicago," he replied, dropping his towel and stepping under the water.

"What? Why? Weren't we just there?"

"Yeah, 2 days ago."

"Fuck, I can hardly keep my days straight anymore. Why are you going back?"

"I've got a charity thing. Being from Chicago and all, I'm going back to play in this poker tournament thing one of the guys on the Blackhawks put together."

"Planning on seeing your folks?"

"Uhh… no, I don't think so."

Normally, Edward always stopped in to see his parents whenever he was in Chicago, but this trip was too short for such a visit. In addition to his charity appearance, there was a certain someone he was hoping to see instead.

The last time he saw Bella, he had paid a security guard $100 to pull her BMW around to the locker room exit of the United Center*, so that he could usher her out into the night unnoticed. He knew having sex in the dressing room was inappropriate and possible grounds for game suspensions and disciplinary action from the league but at the time he didn't care. He'd been looking for her for years, hoping that she'd come back to him and now that she had he'd be damned if he let her get away.

He had asked her to have dinner with him and she didn't exactly refuse, but she didn't exactly accept either. She told him that it was late and made the valid point that she was in no state of dress to go anywhere but back home.

"Let's just…talk," she said. "Maybe get to know each other a little bit. And we'll see what happens."

She made a good point. Their sexual chemistry was explosive and undeniable, and though he felt it in his bones that there was more to them than just physical attraction, there had been nothing as of yet to really show that. Of course, there hadn't exactly been an opportunity. As she drove him to the airport in silence he realized how much potential trouble he was going to be in. He tried not to think about it as he turned to look at her one last time as she pulled up to the terminal.

"Bella," he said, cradling her cheek in his hand and forcing her to look at him. "I don't want to lose you again. You're right, let's just talk. As slow as you want, ok?"

She gave him a small smile and nodded. He smiled back and leaned across the center console to kiss her full lips.

Upon leaving her, he sprinted through the airport slowing down only briefly to get waved through a security check point. The flight attendant at the gate smiled warmly at him before allowing him through the gate, down the stairs and onto the tarmac. Coach Banner and head trainer Dean Boudreaux were standing at the bottom of the airplane steps arguing frantically in the howling wind and snow. When they saw him, both looked completely dumbfounded like they'd seen a ghost.

"Fellas," Edward said casually over the inclement weather.

"Nice of you to join us," Dean growled, crossing his arms over his chest and making it very clear that he was not at all pleased with Edward's tardiness. "Where the hell have you been?"

"Do we really want to stand out here arguing, or should we get this show on the road? I hear the weather's only going to get worse and if we don't leave soon we might not make it back to Pittsburgh tonight." The star forward rubbed his bare hands together vigorously to illustrate his point. "I'm cool with whatever, but you get to explain to the WAGs* why we're so late."

"Get on the fucking plane, Cullen," Dean said flatly, casting him the most withering look known to man.

"After you, coach," Edward gestured for Coach Banner to embark ahead of him, to which he just chuckled in disbelief and shook his head.

"Well, well, well, look who finally decided to grace us with his presence!" Defenseman Warren Boucher hollered from the wing seat of the plane.

"Better late than never, eh boys?" he said with a smirk before taking his usual seat next to Mac.

"Hey Cullsy, you gonna tell me what took you so long?" Emmett asked under his breath.

"Nope, not a chance," he said with a wide grin before quickly falling asleep.

* * *

><p>So... what do you think so far? I'd love to know your thoughts. Several chapters of this story are already done and ready to go, so I should get onto a fairly regular updating schedule, barring anything unforeseen of course.<p>

* Campbell for Kids was founded by Chicago Blackhawks defenseman Brian Campbell as is an organization focused on raising funds for charities throughout Chicago and Illinois that service children with special needs and learning disabilities. On February 10th 2010, Campbell in conjunction with the Horseshoe Casino, hosted the first annual Campbell for Kids Texas Hold'Em event which raised over $100,000. Net proceeds benefitted the Chicagoland Chapter of Autism Speaks, Chicago's Beard School and Campbell for Kids.

* Banksy is an anonymous British graffiti artist, political activist, film director and painter. His satirical street art and subversive epigrams combine irreverent dark humor with graffiti done in a distinctive stencilling technique. Such artistic works of political and social commentary have been featured on streets, walls and bridges in cities throughout the world.

* The United Center is an indoor sports arena located in the Near West Side community area of Chicago. It is named after its corporate sponsor, United Airlines. The United Center is home to both the Chicago Blackhawks of the National Hockey League and the Chicago Bulls of the National Basketball Association.

* WAGs is an acroynm for Wives and Girlfriends


	2. Fancy seeing you here

I was a little overwhelmed by the response I got from just the first chapter. I think that was the most reviews for a first chapter I've ever gotten, so thank you! I'm so glad you are onboard so far! I apologize for not getting back to all of those who reviewed, I am very sorry but please know that I do truly appreciate you taking the time to leave me some kind words.

**I do not own Twilight, but hot hockey players are all mine. ALL OF THEM! =)**

**Playlist: Gimme Sympathy by Metric**

* * *

><p><strong>BPOV<strong>

Isabella wasn't sure that Edward would be at the tournament. He hadn't said anything about it in any of their many text message conversations since their last meeting, but she had a feeling that he would be. It didn't really make sense to her for him to be there; he didn't play for a Chicago team, but maybe because he went to college just up the road in Evanston and was an extremely huge name in the sports world, Chicago had claimed him as their own.

She knew that Mike was the one they had wanted to go to the tournament. He was, after all, the on air talent while Isabella was just a writer for the website. But ESPN Chicago needed a presence at the event and Mike had asked her handle it personally. Isabella really liked Mike, he had been nothing but nice and welcoming to her when she'd made the switch from printed media with the Chicago Sun-Times to cyber media taking the job at ESPN Chicago. She found out shortly after taking the job that Mike had been instrumental in her hiring, stating that he had been a long time reader of her column and admired her point of view. He saw potential in her and took on a sort of mentor role when it came to her career, even though he was barely 2 years her senior.

She hated that Mike was sick and unable to attend, but she also saw his absence as an opportunity for herself; networking opportunities were hard to come by when you work behind the scenes. She took one last look at her reflection in the mirror and reminded herself that she needed to focus on the opportunity in front of her and not the possibility, however remote it may be, that Edward _might_ be there.

There was a sharp rap on her front door alerting Isabella that her ride has arrived. Smoothing down her gray Northwestern Wildcats t-shirt and grabbing her sweater and coat off the hook by the door, she slipped out into the brutal cold.

.~.~.~.~.

"Our apologies, Miss Swan. There wasn't time to change the order, you'll have to wear what we had prepared for Mr. Newton," the young production assistant said nervously handing her a bag as she entered the Horseshoe Casino. Shedding her coat and passing it to the PA, Isabella reached into the bag and withdrew a red and black Chicago Blackhawks jersey, signed by the entire team.

"Is this… for me?" she asked.

"As a celebrity participant, if you get knocked out of the tournament by one of the participants you have to give them the shirt off your back," the young man explained. "We ordered one that would fit Mr. Newton. I'm afraid this is going to be a bit large on you."

"Oh, I see."

She slipped the embroidered mesh jersey over her head only to have it nearly fall to her knees.

_Great, _she thought, blowing a lock of hair out of her eyes.

"You'll be starting at table 4. Good Luck, Miss Swan."

**EPOV**

Edward came in from the cold only to be bombarded with shouting press and flashing cameras.

"Edward, do you expect any of the guys from the Blackhawks to be sore after Wednesday's overtime loss?" a raven haired woman asked him.

"Yeah probably," he laughed. "I'm probably the last guy they want to see right now."

"Do you think any of the guys here will give you a hard time for leaving your home town and playing in another city?"

"Of course, I mean _I'd_ give me a hard time about that. But you know, I got drafted by Pittsburgh so I've got to give Pittsburgh everything I've got. Chicago will always be home though."

"You grew up watching the Blackhawks, what is it like putting on one of their jerseys now that you have to face off against them with the Penguins?"

"I have a lot of respect for this club. I think the entire program is a real class act… but I'll be really happy when I get to take this thing off." He smiled warmly down at the dark haired reporter, laughter creasing the corners of his eyes, and moved on through the crowd toward the gambling floor.

He stopped and spoke to several members of the Chicago team, laughing and joking with them about him finding himself wearing black and red for the first time in his professional career.

It was a common misconception that because hockey players fought each other on the ice they hated each other off of it, and that simply wasn't the case. Edward knew many of them from playing on Team USA in the 2009 Olympics, or from having met previously at the NHL awards and harbored no ill feelings toward any of them. Even those who had talked trash about him in the press, he couldn't stay angry with; at least not tonight. He had plans to call Bella as soon as the tournament was over and ask her out for drinks or perhaps show up at her house with flowers and a bottle of wine; whatever it took to show her that he was serious. What he didn't expect was to see the object of his affection practically swimming in a black and red jersey across the gambling floor.

"Excuse me guys," he said politely, slipping away from the group of players and making his way to where a petite brunette sat perched on a stool at the bar.

Her hair hung smooth and silky down her back, and her deep brown eyes were fixed on the amber liquid in her glass as she drank. After setting her glass back down on the bar, her tongue swept across her plump lower lip to gather any excess moisture and draw it back into her eager mouth. Beneath the low hanging sweater, Edward could see a pair of well fitting jeans that clung to her thighs and backside in a way that should almost be criminal. There was just one, tiny problem.

"You'd look much better if you were wearing black and gold," he said softly, letting his lips come within a hair's breadth of her ear as he watched goosebumps break out across her neck.

She gasped and turned quickly on her stool and almost toppled sideways. Edward's arms shot out in an instant to steady her before she fell into the tournament participant flanking her. Slowly, slowly, she turned her gaze up to look at him through her lashes.

"Thanks," she said timidly.

"Of course," he replied with a soft chuckle. "What are you doing here? You're kind of ruining my plans."

Bella straightened herself up to her full height and cleared her throat.

"I'm here representing ESPN Chicago. My coworker is still sick, so I came in his place. But I should be asking you the same thing, what are you doing here? And plans? What plans am I ruining?" she asked, a deep pucker forming between her brows.

He had to laugh again; she was so adorable when she was flustered.

"I'm here because I grew up here."

"You did?" she asked incredulously.

"You didn't know that? I thought… huh…" he smiled and rubbed his large, callused hand over the back of his neck.

"You thought what?"

"Nevermind, its nothing."

She raised an eyebrow questioningly at him, but decided not to press the issue.

"Let's back up here, what plans am I ruining?" she continued.

"Nothing slips past you, does it?" he laughed. "I was going to surprise you. You know, some grand, romantic gesture." He placed his hands on her hips and leaned down to kiss her only to have her shift away from him, her cheeks flaming crimson.

"Look Edward, that's sweet of you and all, but you're … who you are and I'm … who I am. I mean, we can't just_ be_ together, just like that."

"Because…?"

"Because!" she exclaimed, her blush intensifying. "People will ask how you how you met me, and what are you going to tell them?" She lowered her voice to a grumbling whisper, "'Oh yeah, I fucked her in the dressing room after a game.' Do you have any idea what that would do to my career? I already have a hard enough time having men take me seriously. I don't need to add being slutty to their already long list of reasons why I shouldn't be hanging around in a locker room."

"First of all Bella, it is nobody's business how we met or what the circumstances were, ok? Second of all, you aren't slutty. If memory serves, I all but forced you into it. That isn't to say you didn't enjoy yourself…?" He flashed her a bone melting smile and watched her sway on her feet a bit.

"When has it being none of their business ever prevented press from asking those types of questions? Believe me, I should know," she stated firmly after regaining her composure. "We just need to get our stories straight, ok? Once we have a… I don't know… _alibi_ established then we can… we can do whatever we want."

"_Whatever_ we want?" he said with a smirk.

"Edward, come on!" she demanded, her hands planted firmly on her hips and her expression making it clear that she was in not in a joking mood.

"Ok, ok. What's the story?"

"We… knew each other a little in college and then… we ran into each other here and reconnected. That's it."

"Sounds easy enough to stick to."

"But that means no physical contact tonight, ok? People might ask questions if they see us here acting like we're… together."

"_Are_ we together?" he asked, a seductive smile playing on his lips.

"I can't have this conversation with you right now. The tournament's about the start."

"We'll save it for later then, maybe over dinner?" he called after her as she retreated into the crowd, her drink firmly in hand.

Edward ordered a beer for himself and made his way over to table 7 where he would start the tournament, all the while an amused smirk plastered firmly to his features.

.~.~.~.

Three rounds later, Edward still had his shirt and had managed to amass a rather impressive stack of chips. A few of the other celebrities had been knocked out early and were mingling with the other eliminated participants. Although the tournament was for charity, Edward was a competitor by nature and lived to win. He talked trash with a few of the other celebrities and engaged the other participants at his table; all in all enjoying himself to the best of his ability, all the while keeping an eye on the lovely brunette working her way up through the tables as well. He couldn't help but notice that Bella had a cache of chips that rivaled the size of his own.

"Alright, Cullen. Straight, Queen high." The portly fellow across the table leaned forward with his elbows on the edge of the table; a satisfied grin curled his bristle covered lips back to show his teeth clutching a dull toothpick between them. "Let's see what you've got."

Edward ran a hand nervously through his unruly hair and down the back of his neck. He glanced over at Bella raking in another hand's winnings across the room and let out a long held breath.

"That's a tough hand to beat, you know that?" he laughed.

"You're damn right, I know that," the man with the toothpick boomed, his sizable belly shaking beneath his Chicago bears sweat shirt.

"Full house, 10's and 7's." Edward fanned his cards out on the green felt and watched as the toothpick fell from the man's mouth and into his whiskey.

"You've gotta be shittin' me," the man said in disbelief.

"You win some, you lose some. No hard feelings?" He extended his large hand across the table, and across the mountain of chips, toward the paunchy gentleman still staring incredulously at his beaten hand.

"I hope the 'hawks win the cup," the man finally chuckled and good-naturedly took Edward's hand to gave it a firm shake.

"Ladies and Gentlemen," a bearded, ginger haired man said into a microphone from the raised platform near the bar. "I can't thank you enough for coming and sharing your evening and your generosity with us tonight." Resounding applause erupted across the gambling floor. "So far tonight we've raised $160,000 and every cent of that money will go in equal parts to the Chicagoland chapter of Autism Speaks, Chicago public schools, and other various organizations supported by Campbell for Kids." More applause and several whistles were heard again. "Now that things are really starting to heat up, I invite you all to take a break and grab a drink or say hello to a few of our celebrities while the always impeccable staff here at the Horseshoe condense our game down to the final 5 tables. I hope you will all stick around to see who goes home the lucky winner." The bearded man gave one more wave to the gathered crowd before jumping off the platform and setting in motion the removal of three-fourths of the tables.

An attractive blonde casino worker appeared at Edward's side and offered to gather his winnings for him while he enjoyed himself. He thanked her graciously, trying to ignore how enthusiastically she was batting her eyelashes at him, and set off to find his girl in the crowd.

He found her near the rear of the floor being chatted up by the Blackhawks' captain. She was smiling sweetly and giving him her full attention, but Edward could tell by the stiffness in her posture and the way she was shifting from foot to foot ever so slightly that she was only being polite.

In a few long, graceful strides he cut through the crowd and crossed behind where Bella and the captain were standing. In a rather animated gesture, he took two more steps and then did a double-take.

"Bella?" he questioned. "Bella Swan?" She turned her attention from her companion and looked at him with as neutral of an expression as she could manage while still conveying complete and utter confusion in her eyes. "Oh my god, I can't believe it. It has been so long!" He bent down and pulled her into a tight hug.

"Oh wow, Edward it _has_ been a long time. How are you?" the giggled, finally catching on to his actions and trying to cover the fact that she found his over exaggerated behavior hilarious.

"I'm great…wow… you look just... well, you've always been beautiful but you look stunning, really." As he released her from their embrace, he trailed on large, strong hand down her arm that seemed fragile and small in comparison to his own, down to her delicate hand and brought it up to his lips. Her fair skin flushed to the point that it almost blended in with the red of the jersey on her back.

"Thank you, Edward. You always were quite the charmer," she giggled.

"You two know each other?" the captain interjected, eager to insert himself back into the conversation with the lovely reporter.

"Umm… yeah," she replied, shaking her head slightly as if to clear herself from an Edward induced fog. "We went to college together, but we haven't seen each other in what—3, 4 years?"

"Shit it's been longer than that hasn't it? It was freshman year… that game against Marquette, I remember you used to wear glasses then," he mused with a sly wink. "So I guess that's more like 6 or 7 years."

Her flush intensified. "I still wear glasses sometimes."

"That's a shame," the captain offered. "Your eyes are beautiful."

Bella and Edward both slowly turned to look at the third member of their conversation like he was an intruder.

"Thank you, Jonathan. That's very sweet of you to say," she said with a courteous smile.

"Hey Taser*, do you mind if I steal Bella here away for a minute? We've got some major catching up to do. Thanks, buddy." Without waiting for an answer he placed his hand on the small of Bella's back and steered her away from the captain and into a more secluded corner of the room.

"That was rude, Edward," she said firmly, trying to hide her giddy smile behind her drink. "He was nice."

"Who Taser? Yeah, he's a stand up guy, a bit of a wet blanket but you know, if _nice_ does it for you…" he winked down at her again and she bit her cheek to keep from smiling further.

She turned to face him when they reached a quieter place. "That was quite a show you put on over there. A little over the top, don't you think?"

"I'm a hockey player, I'm used to exaggerating. Besides, now we have our alibi."

"Fair enough." He loved the fact that she couldn't seem to stop smiling whenever he spoke to her.

"So, care to join me for a late dinner tonight?" he pressed, fully intending to spend as much time with her has he possibly could while he was in town.

"Edward!" a booming voice interrupted. He groaned audibly and turned to face the owner of the voice.

"Marcus? Hey, how are you? I didn't know you would be here tonight." Edward shook hands with the clean cut man in starched khakis and a black polo shirt.

"Always eager to give back, Edward, always eager to give. This is a great cause that I'm happy to be a part of. Besides, Stan Bowman* and I go way back. But honestly Cullen, where are your manners? Hello beautiful," he said smoothly as he turned his attention to Bella.

"Excuse me, Bella this is Marcus Stringer. He writes for the Pittsburgh Trib, and covers most of the Pens games. Marcus this is my friend Bella Swan, we uhh… went to school together."

"Pleasure to meet you, Bella. I'm trying not to be jealous of the fact that you're wearing the mark of an invited guest to this event and I'm not. What kind of work are you in that garnered such a distinguished distinction?" He smiled genuinely at her.

"I write for ESPN Chicago*," she said confidently.

"Oh, so you know Mike Newton?"

"Yes, sir."

"Where is he anyway? I thought I'd catch him around here tonight." Marcus turned and animatedly scanned the room.

"He's rather ill, actually. That's why I'm here, sir."

"How lucky for us then. And stop with this _sir _business, it makes me feel old. I'm just Marcus." He smiled and Bella laughed. "So tell me Bella, at which table will you be when all this gets started again?"

Bella reached into the front pocket of her jeans to withdraw a small card.

"Table 2, it looks like."

"Wonderful! I'll be joining you there myself. Shall we?" Marcus offered his arm to Bella who hesitantly took it while casting an apologetic glance at Edward over her shoulder.

**BPOV**

"So tell me, Bella," Marcus said over the rim of his scotch. "How do you like working for ESPN?"

"It's great, a dream come true really. I started out in traditional media, but I knew this was where I wanted to eventually be," she replied amiably as one of the casino employees stacked her chips for her.

"I'm glad you love what you do. Loving the job really is key to being successful at it, and believe me I know sometimes it's hard to love. It's just a shame to have someone like you working behind the scenes. Have you ever thought about being on air?" Marcus asked.

"Of course I have. But Mike and Riley are the voices, and I'd never want to take anything from them. They're great guys and have been really good to me since I got hired. I owe them a lot, especially Mike."

"Of course, of course," he said flippantly. "But what if one of them were to move on to something else, would you want to be considered as their replacement?"

"Absolutely," she said without hesitation.

"And what if an opportunity arose for you outside of Chicago, would you take it?"

"It would depend on what it was. I really like Chicago, and I've lived here for a while now, but I'm not opposed to moving—if the motivation was right."

"I like you, Bella. You've got a good head on your shoulders, that's hard to find these days."

"Thank you, Marcus." Flattered, she smiled warmly as the next round of play began and chatter turned from business to less serious matters.

* * *

><p>Remember this chapter, it will be important later. =)<p>

* Jonathan Bryan Toews (pronounced _TAYVZ; _born April 29, 1988, goes by the nickname Taser) is a Canadian professional hockey center who plays for and is captain of the Chicago Blackhawks of the National Hockey League (NHL). Toews is currently the youngest captain inthe NHL

* Stanley Bowman (born June 28, 1973) is the current Vice President and General Manager of the Chicago Blackhawks of the NHL

* ESPN Radio is a partnership between the cable sports channel and national radio. ESPN Radio currently has four company-owned stations in New York, Los Angeles, Chicago and Dallas. Each station is partnered with an ESPN local website named for the city (for example, ESPNNewYork [dot] com for New York). Each website produces streaming content specific to their own local demographic.


	3. The Best Part

Another chapter, right on schedule. Enjoy!

**I do not own Twilight, but hot hockey players are all mine. ALL OF THEM =)**

**Playlist: I Want Some More by Dan Auerbach **

* * *

><p>Bella stood amongst the crowd, clapping and smiling as the hockey forward who played for another team in another city reluctantly relinquished the shirt off of his back to the middle aged woman to his right.<p>

"What can I say? When you've got me, you've got me," he said with a charming smile as he handed the jersey to the woman and revealing a white cotton tshirt that seemed to be straining against the width of his chest.

"Oh I'll have you alright," she woman laughed.

"Carol, behave!" he joked. "People can't know about us, or they'll think this was all a set up." He winked at her which caused her to erupt into another fit of girlish giggles.

"Ladies and gentleman, we have our winner!" the ginger haired man boomed to another round of lively applause. The woman shook hand after hand as people filed by and congratulated her on her win.

Edward posed for a series of photos, congratulated the woman one more time before slipping off into the crowd once again to find his real prize.

"Have I said I'm sorry yet?" he asked, appearing at Bella's side.

"Sorry for what?"

"Oh, I don't know. For beating your last hand. For breaking your tape recorder. And for not calling all those years ago."

"I knew it wasn't a winner. You can buy me a new one. And I wouldn't have answered anyway," she replied matter-of-factly, an amused smirk playing at the corners of her mouth.

"Hungry?"

"You never give up, do you?"

"Do you want me to give up?"

"I didn't say that."

"Good because this time I won't stop til I'm told to. And maybe not even then."

Bella continued to clap but also began to bite the inside of her cheek, for what seemed like the millionth time that night, to control how wide her smile was getting; she didn't want to appear over eager. But the truth was she was incredibly eager; she had had only two truly satisfying sexual experiences in her life and both had been with Edward. Of course she was eager.

"Fine, I'll go. Do you have a car here?" she said abruptly, turning to face him with her hands on her slim but shapely hips.

"Yep. It's a rental but it'll do. I'll take you anywhere you want to go."

Bella reached over and grabbed Edward's wrist to look at his watch.

"It's 11:30, there's an all night diner I know of on North Avenue—"

"The Hollywood Grill?" he interrupted.

She cocked an eyebrow at him before easing into a satisfied smile.

"That's the one. You can buy me milkshake." She linked her arm with his and let him escort her into the lobby of the casino to retrieve their coats then out into the falling snow.

.~.~.~.

"You really didn't look for me at all?" Edward asked over his plate piled high with a double cheese burger and French fries. He was doing his best to act like that fact didn't bother him, but was apparently not doing a very good job of it.

"Not at all. It was too… I don't know. I wanted to forget the whole thing ever happened." She popped a French fry into her own into her mouth and chewed thoughtfully.

"But you couldn't?"

Bella rolled her eyes at the boyish grin on his handsome face.

"No, I couldn't."

After a long pull from his chocolate milkshake he went on. "I wish I could say I had your level of discipline after we left things."

"How so?" she asked, cocking her head to one side.

"Believe me, I tried to forget all about you. 'There's plenty of fish in the sea' or whatever. But you just sort of stuck with me. So I… well let's just say Facebook was really helpful."

Her mouth fell open in amused disbelief. "You facebook stalked me?"

"Stalking is such a harsh word. I like to think of it more like… checking in on an old friend from time to time," he chuckled.

He began to laugh even harder when he was hit in the forehead with a crinkle cut fry.

"Even heard of privacy?" she giggled.

"I've been in the spotlight for as long as I can remember. What the hell is privacy?"

"And that is exactly why I'm glad I'm not you," she replied into her shake.

"Yeah I'm glad you're not me too. That would make our relationship up to this point really awkward," he quipped sarcastically.

"So, what exactly did you find out from facebook stalking me anyway? I guess if we're going to get to know each other I need to know what ground has already been covered."

Edward took another bite of his burger and took a moment to choose his words carefully.

"Well, I know that you dated some guy pretty soon after we had our _thing_. What was that all about?"

"Did you really expect me to wait around for you, some guy I never intended to see again?"

"Well…no, I guess not. But that guy? What was his name? He was so… ok Bella let's face it, the guy was a nerd." Edward stated matter-of-factly.

Bella snorted with laughter and tossed the remainder of her burger back onto her plate.

"I'll have you know that Tyler was a really sweet guy. He was always a perfect gentleman to me."

"And how much fun was that?"

"Touché. Moving on."

"Okay, I know that you were sports editor of the school paper. A belated congratulations for that, by the way."

"Thanks," she snorted again.

"I know that you graduated a semester early."

"I did. I worked my ass off to do it, too."

"I bet you did. You probably had about as hectic of a schedule as I did and there was no way I could have graduated early. I also know that after graduation you went to work for the Sun-Times and you dated some pretty boy reporter for a while. Whatever happened with him?"

The smile that had previously occupied Bella's face quickly evaporated into thin air, and was replaced with a puckered brow.

"It didn't work out," she said flatly.

"Uh oh, that doesn't sound good."

"It wasn't. Can we change the subject?"

"Did he hurt you?" Edward asked, his primal need to protect flaring deep in his chest.

Bella heaved an exasperated sigh. "He was a jerk, that's all. I never should have gotten involved with him in the first place."

"So why did you?"

"Because of you, actually." Bella shook her head and smiled ruefully.

"Me? How do you figure?"

"Can we please talk about something else? Why don't you get in the hot seat for a while? I'm tired of playing twenty questions."

"Ok fine. Since you didn't check in on me, I'll give you the highlight reel; I graduated the semester after you did, I went into the draft that summer and got signed by the Pens, moved to Pittsburgh-"

"And girlfriends? How many notches are there on your bed post?" she asked through a mouthful of burger.

"Not as many as you might expect. I was never really into the whole _girlfriend _thing though."

"Well that sounds encouraging," she laughed sarcastically. "And why is that?"

"Because of you, actually," he chuckled, using her own words back at her. "I was always looking for you, so… I guess it just never seemed right or fair to string girls along for any real period of time. I mean, there were girls here and there… chicks on the road, some I'd see again, some I wouldn't." That rueful smile appeared on her face again and she kept her eyes trained on her plate as he continued. "But the truth is Bella, all I ever wanted was you. Or at least the opportunity to know you." He reached across the table to put his large hand over hers. "I know that sounds stupid, and believe me most of the guys would call me a pussy if they ever heard me say this, but it's the truth. I know I barely knew you back then, but I wanted to. Fuck, I wanted you more than anything I've ever wanted in my entire life. Do you know why I couldn't have graduated early? Because I almost failed my entire first semester because I was hung up on you and I fell behind. You were all I could think about, morning noon and night. But…" he sighed, "we both had our obligations, and I get that. I just… I just wished things could have been different, you know?"

"Yeah, I know. It would have saved us both a lot of hassle if we hadn't been such cowards back then," she smiled.

"I was a complete and total chicken shit," he smiled back, happy to have seemingly brightened her mood.

"But here we are now."

"Here we are. What are we going to do about it?" He gave her hand a little squeeze.

"I don't know, Edward. I'm in Chicago, and you're… everywhere."

"Distance is no excuse Bella, believe me. I'm not bragging here, but I've got more money than I could ever need. I will come to you when I can or I will pay for you to come to me."

"What makes you think I need your money?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

"It's not… I didn't mean…" he faltered.

Bella laughed a deep throaty sound that made Edward's heart pound.

"I'm just fucking with you, Cullen. But you're right, we can make the distance work if we really try."

"Yeah?" he asked, a hopeful, childlike smile spreading across his handsome, chiseled features.

Bella nodded and returned the look of hope on his face. She hadn't felt this good in a very long time. Her heart was racing, her palms sweaty, and for the first time in her adult life the voice in her head that always told her to use caution was silent.

.~.~.~.

"So how long before you go back?" Bella asked as Edward walked her to the door of her condo with her small, delicate hand wrapped in his own.

"Tomorrow morning. I was only in town for the tournament really. I didn't think I'd end up actually finding you and getting to spend some time with you. I mean, I hoped but I didn't think it would actually happen. Shit, I hope the hotel still has my reservation. My flight got delayed out of Pittsburgh and I had to go straight from the airport to the tournament. Not that I'm complaining, believe me. Seeing you was a very pleasant surprise that would make sleeping in my car absolutely worth it."

Bella turned to face her escort and looked up at him through her lashes. "You're not going to have to sleep in your car, Edward."

He knew what she was saying, and truth be told, he had been hoping for it all along but now he found himself feeling hesitant and unsure of what to do.

"Bella, I appreciate the offer, I really do. I'll sleep on the couch or—"

"Cullen," she laughed raising her hand to silence him. "You're not sleeping on my couch, ok? You said we could go as slow as I wanted right? So this is what I want and I'm perfectly capable of sharing my bed with a man without letting things get out of hand. You are not going to make me do something I don't want to do, got it?"

"Got it," he replied with a smirk.

"Besides all I want right now is to get warm. It's freezing out here, so let's go inside."

Edward followed her up the front steps and tried his best not to think of all the ways he'd like to keep her warm.

They passed through an iron archway between buildings which lead to an open brick courtyard flanked on all four sides by four identical brick buildings facing into the courtyard and toward each other. He followed her to the building on the far side of the courtyard, past snow covered benches and a frozen fountain and up another set of brick and iron stairs. She pushed open a heavy oak door and flicked on the light in the foyer to reveal the entrance to the place she called home.

So many times he'd imagined what her place must look like; as he lay in bed countless nights before games wondering where she was and if she was thinking about him too. He needed to take this all in so he could better picture her on any lonely nights in the future.

Bella closed the heavy door behind them before shaking the snow out of her long, dark hair and hanging her coat up on the hook by the entrance.

"This is home?" he asked, looking around the light, modern condo.

"This is home," she answered with a smile. "I love it here; this place is about as close to perfect as it gets for me."

Edward hung his coat up next to hers and began to curiously wander the space.

It was obvious from the moment she turned on the light that a woman lived there as the wall directly adjacent to the front door was painted a deep, eggplant purple. The richness of the dark color was set off by the warm hardwood floors and the pale brick that made up the other walls in her spacious and modern kitchen. Atop her high-top table with matching leather chairs sat a crystal vase over flowing with fresh, bright colored flowers which caused Edward to wonder if someone had bought them for her, and if so whom had it been and why.

Across the hall from the kitchen was an expansive living area with more pale brick walls alongside one large light gray one. A large flat screen television hung on the brick above her black marble fireplace beside a cozy looking dark leather sofa. On the walls hung wrought iron candle sconces and brightly colored pieces of modern art. The place was hard and soft, side by side, just like Bella.

"Bella your place is…"

"I know it's a little much for the male species to handle but—"

"No, I like it. It's great. I mean, purple wouldn't be _my _personal choice per se but I think it looks really nice in here." Edward ran his hand along the industrial brick, the hard texture juxtaposed next to the soft, warm colors.

"You haven't even seen the best part yet," she said with a smile and motioned for him to follow her up the narrow, curving staircase. At the top of the stairs was a hallway that ran the length of the condo and mirrored the corridor downstairs. At the far end of the hall, at the back of the house Edward watched Bella disappear through an open door. His heart began to pound because he just _knew _that she had gone into her bedroom. The door to his left was open and he could see evidence of an office, another door; a bathroom. There was no other option; she was leading him to her room. He tried not to get the wrong idea but it was too late; wrong idea after wrong idea infiltrated his brain and there was little hope of going back.

"So, this is my room," she said innocently gesturing to the clean, open space. There was more of the industrial brick set off and complimented this time by one wall painted a lighter, softer lavender. In the middle of the room stood a large, sturdy looking four poster bed with a fluffy white bed spread and soft looking pillows in muted tones.

"So this is the best part?" he asked through a lump that had risen in his throat.

"No, this is."

With a smile she opened what appeared to be a closet and Edward assumed that like any typical female, she was going to show him an expansive walk-in wardrobe. But instead he was surprised to find yet another staircase nestled inside the slight space, spiraling up to a third floor he wasn't even aware existed. He followed close behind as the stairs wound higher and higher until they reached a landing surrounded on all four sides by glass with one door leading out onto a rooftop terrace.

"_This _is the best part," she said with a grin as she pushed open the door, blasting them both with a steady stream of whipping winter air. Clad in only her thin sweater and her Northwestern t-shirt, Edward saw Bella begin to shiver almost immediately but he followed her onto the snow covered terrace just the same.

"And this is the best part of the best part," she added, grabbing his hand and turning him toward an amazing view of the illuminated Chicago skyline.

"Wow," he breathed. "This is beautiful, Bella."

They stood there shivering together in the cold watching the twinkling lights of the urban jungle just a few blocks away, but despite the bitter cold both of their hands were sweaty and warm against one another's. After what felt like an eternity Edward gently pulled the petite brunette in close and held her against his chest.

Neither said a word but simply stood in the silent falling snow and windy night air and held each other as if their lives depended on it.

* * *

><p>Thoughts? I'd love to know what you're thinking so far!<p>

Bella's condo may be a little bit difficult to imagine, but it is based off of a real condo in Chicago. Links to images, if you're interested, are on my profile.


	4. Normal people require toothpaste

Hey guys! I'm sorry it has taken me so long to get this chapter out, life is forever getting in the way. I'm going to _try _really really hard to get into a biweekly updating schedule, so please excuse this little lapse... I'll do my best not to let it happen again.

So who all is watching the Stanley Cup Finals? Anyone? Anyone?

**I do not own Twilight, but hot hockey players are all mine. ALL OF THEM! =)**

**Playlist: Song for the Girl by Matthew Good** [links to all music mentioned here can now be found on my profile]

***Edited to correct some minor errors* **

* * *

><p>In the morning, Edward awoke warm and comfortable in a bed that seemed familiar and safe. For a moment he even thought he was at home in his own bed, that he had dreamed the whole night he'd spent laughing and talking with Bella and was back home in Pittsburgh. His eyes flew open with a jolt and his breath caught in his chest, but he quickly realized that he definitely was not at home. He was staring at a pale brick wall and was wrapped in a sweet smelling comforter.<p>

_Definitely not my place… _he thought, to his own pleasure.

He rolled over to find himself face to face with a peaceful, sleeping angel of a woman. She was lying on her stomach with her arms wrapped firmly and completely around a soft, fluffy pillow. She looked so beautiful lying there with her eyelashes fanning out over her cheeks and her lips parted ever so slightly; he wanted to lean over and kiss her right then.

They had stayed up until the first rays of the early morning sun had broken over the cityscape, talking and catching up on lives that had been spent apart. He felt like he was just now getting to know her, and in reality he was. Bella had been perfection to him, the unattainable dream, but he didn't know who she was beyond their mutual attraction. He had fallen asleep feeling happy that he had finally gotten the opportunity to scratch the surface of all the things he'd missed over the years.

"Don't stare at me," she grumbled, her eyes still closed.

"Why? You're beautiful when you're sleeping," he chuckled.

"Ugh… I feel gross." Bella rolled onto her back and stretched her arms over her head with a groan. "This isn't exactly the way I had envisioned waking up next to you for the first time."

"I just like the fact that you _have _envisioned it," he replied with a smile, sliding in next to her and planting a soft kiss on her yawning mouth.

"Mmm... toothpaste is a must for most of us normal people," she mumbled against Edward's lips, smiling in spite of herself.

"Normal? What's normal anyway?" He continued to kiss her until she relented and molded her mouth to his. The kiss was soft and sweet and full of promise. He could feel her body relaxing beneath him and he could feel every muscle let go of pretense or self consciousness until she was threading her fingers into his hair, pulling him closer.

He breathed her in and savored the sweet scent of her soft, warm skin and her silky hair; let them fill his lungs with their intoxicating fragrance until he felt like he was going to burst.

The kisses continued until he felt her small, nimble hands slide under the thin cotton of his tshirt and rake her fingernails gently over his stomach. He moaned into her mouth at the sensation causing her to giggle seductively.

"Your buttons are easy to push," she breathed.

"Maybe I just like the way you push them," he whispered back before securing his arms around her and rolling the both of them over so that she was sprawled across his chest. She let out a tiny yelp of surprise followed by more low, throaty giggles.

After several more long moments of indulging in each other's kiss, Bella pulled her lips away and sat upright. Her knees supported her weight on either side of his hips, effectively straddling him and pinning him to the bed.

Flipping her long, bedraggled hair back away from her face and over her shoulder, she flashed another alluring smile down at him.

"The way I push them, huh? I wouldn't say I do anything particularly special," she said with a smirk and a small, though decidedly wicked, rock of her hips against him.

"Everything about you is special," he replied as he placed his large, callused hands on the tender skin at the back of her knees. "Special," he whispered. His hands moved up to explore the smooth skin of her shapely thighs, "special." He continued his exploration by pushing the edge of her Northwestern tshirt up to expose her thin, white cotton panties. His hands came to rest on the fullest part of her hips covered only by a tiny scrap of material, "very special."

Further and further up her body he climbed, declaring each part of her more special than the last. His thick fingers circled her navel, traced the sway of her waist, and counted their way up her ribcage, all the while pushing her tshirt further and further up her torso.

She chewed her lower lip nervously between her teeth as his hands continued to creep northward and he could feel her heart hammering wildly in her chest. He sat up quickly whilst pulling her shirt off over her head and sliding one hand around her back to rest between her shoulder blades to steady her. Her breasts were left pressed between the two of them as their mouths hovered barely millimeters apart.

"Not just special," he whispered, "but perfect." His warm breath filled her mouth with every hushed word.

Tiny hands clung to his shoulders, clawing at the offending piece of clothing that still covered him and separated them. As quickly as she could, she tugged and pulled at his shirt until all that needed to be done was to slide it over his head. When they were finally chest to chest and skin to skin, Edward allowed her to pull his mouth up to hers once more. Her fingers knotted into his hair and tugged at his roots in a manner that was forceful yet far from uncomfortable.

His hips jerked upward involuntarily, seeking purchase against the warmth that was radiating though their flimsy cotton barriers. She whimpered into his mouth.

Slowly, and almost reluctantly, he broke the connection of their lips; her mouth chasing desperately after his retreat.

"Ah ah ah," he admonished with a lazy grin as he lay back on the bed. Still, she tried to follow but he stopped her by encircling her waist with his large, strong hands, preventing her from leaning forward.

With a huff, she sat back on her knees again and stared down at him.

"You are so gorgeous," he said in a deep, smooth voice as his eyes raked over her exposed flesh. To his amusement, a trail of pink flared up on her cheeks and flushed her all the way down to the already rosy buds on her chest.

"You shouldn't say things like that to me, you know," Bella said, her voice taking on that low, seductive quality that he'd quickly come to love.

"And why is that?"

"I'll start to think you mean it." On the surface, her face read flirtatious and playful but behind the warm, melted chocolate of her eyes he could see a hint that she might actually be serious.

"You should believe it, Bella. You're the most incredible thing I've ever seen." He tried to make her believe it with his words but he knew that he'd be better off to show her rather than to tell her how amazing he thought she truly was.

He ran his hands up her spine and gently pulled her down to his mouth. When she melted into his kiss and her body went limp he rolled the both of them over once again so that she was pinned beneath him. This time she didn't yelp or giggle, she simply received every bit of the passion that he was pouring into their kiss and attempted to return it in kind. Balancing his weight on one forearm, he used his free hand to slide the slight cotton of her panties down her legs and discard them onto the floor beside the bed.

When she was free and bare beneath him, Edward's thick fingers ghosted their way back up her smooth legs. He took his time exploring their satiny softness, every curve and every dimple before finally settling on the moistened cleft between them. He gently eased her legs apart and guided one finger between her glistening folds. She moaned softly against his lips at the sensation of his touch.

As he continued to trace the contours of her sex, Bella raised one leg to hook a toe under the waistband of his boxer briefs and tug them down his solid, muscular thighs. Once he had kicked his underwear off the side of the bed, he settled between her parted thighs and replaced his curious fingers with the head of his rigid cock.

Never letting their lips part, he slowly and gently pressed inside of her. Her moans reverberated off the inside of his mouth and down through his chest, spurring him on.

"Oh my god, Edward…" the breathed almost to herself, tearing her lips away from his and throwing her head back against her pillow.

He continued to push forward until he was buried inside of her to the hilt. Once they were flush against one another he paused for a brief moment to allow her body to adjust to his size and to allow himself the opportunity to gaze down at her expression of unadulterated pleasure. As Edward felt her relax he began to move, slowly at first and gradually building steam and intensity. His thrusts were long, deep, and deliberate and each motion sent shockwaves of pleasure through both of their bodies. Bella countered his movements with her own, flexing her hips to meet his equally.

The sounds that escaped her throat she hardly recognized as her own voice; unintelligible half words mixed together with eager moans and sighs to create a buzz of satisfaction in her quiet bedroom. As he felt his own pleasure growing, Edward buried his face into the curve of her neck and whispered words of affection against her skin. Words like "beautiful," "tight," "soft," "wonderful," "sexy," sent goosebumps erupting across her skin and brought Bella closer and closer to the edge. And the closer she got the more she clawed and gripped at his broad, muscular back, the hardened flesh barely yielding to the pressure from her fingers.

Her legs tightened around his waist and he could feel her body begin to constrict around him elsewhere. Edward knew that she was close so he quickened his thrusts more and more until all he could hear was the rushing of blood in his ears, her raspy cries and the creaking of her wooden framed bed.

Bella writhed and bucked beneath him, desperate to stave off her climax to prolong the experience of having him in her bed, but she shouldn't hold on for long. He shifted his weight ever so slightly and it seemed to press a button inside of her that opened the floodgates; she was powerless to hold back any longer. Her body tightened and trembled around him as she called his name. It was then his turn to be powerless to hold back and he fell apart inside of her.

Slowly, slowly they both came down together; Bella trembling and limp below and Edward sweaty and panting above.

"Fuck…" he said, half panting half laughing.

"Yeah," she laughed back.

He rolled off of her onto his back and pulled her slight frame into his side.

After a few long moments of simply holding each other, Edward sighed.

"I can't believe I have to turn around and leave you again," he said with a frown and a kiss to her forehead.

"It's alright," she replied softly. "You know where to find me now."

"I know I just…" he sighed again, "I just wish we had more time."

"I wish we did too, but you've got a team that's depending on you." Bella propped herself up on one arm to look down on his striking face. "You wear that A on your sweater* for a reason. I'm not trying to lecture you or anything but there are much bigger things in the world than you and me, Edward. You don't need me or whatever this is that we're doing distracting you from your career."

"Spoken like a true person from the sports world," he chuckled.

"I'm serious, Edward. You've got to focus. You've got a big game… _shit_ tomorrow!" She sat up quickly in a near panic.

"Bella, calm down," he laughed again, sitting up beside her. "I've got a flight out this afternoon and I'm meeting the guys in Vancouver. I don't have much time but I do have _some_, so why don't we just enjoy it, okay?"

Taking a deep breath, she gave him a small smile.

"Sorry," the murmured, "It's hard to leave work at work sometimes."

"Hey, how many guys get to say that their girl works for ESPN? Your work can bleed into our private lives all it wants."

.~.~.~.~.

Flying first class always had its perks. Though he never minded signing autographs or posing for pictures with fans, he wasn't always in the mood and flying first class allowed him a certain level of privacy. The other passengers in the first class cabin either had no idea who he was or acknowledged him with a simple nod of the head. On that particular flight he wasn't feeling up for pictures. Not that he wasn't in the mood to smile, but because he was afraid that the look on his face would be a tell tale sign that he'd been up to something. That and he was still wrapped up in his thoughts of Bella and the night and morning they'd spent together.

His mind kept wandering back to the vision of her cumming all over his cock in her bed and then again on his fingers as they showered together before he left. As he thought, his hand would always find its way close to his nose so that he could just barely pick up the faint, though distinctly sweet, fragrance of her juices that still clung to his skin. Whenever physical evidence of his memories of her began to arise he would hear her voice in his head telling him that he needed to focus and that his team needed him.

Meeting the team in Vancouver meant that he was missing an important part of team tradition; the trip with all of his boys. It seemed trivial to some, but hockey players are notoriously superstitious and often do painstaking rituals before each game. A ritual for all of them before an away game was the flight, all of them together an army marching into battle. Many of the guys on the team were married and had children and the flight was a rare opportunity for them to relax with their peers without the pressure or expectation of practice or a game looming over their heads. Though he hated to miss out on something so important, he didn't regret his decision in the slightest. His time with Bella was more than he could have ever hoped for and he had nothing but optimism about what was to come in their future.

Needing a distraction from his thoughts before his nearest neighbor started to get suspicious of his constant shifting in his seat, Edward pulled out his portable gaming console and logged onto the global network. He knew that at least some of the guys would be playing their games as well and if he couldn't be on the plane with them, at least he'd be able to take part in some of the in-flight activities.

He logged on and did a search for Emmett and found him immediately.

_Hey buddy, how was chitown? Did you win big? _Emmett's message popped up on his screen.

Edward thought briefly about how much he wanted to disclose to his closest friend on the team. He was never one to brag about his conquests and had a reputation for being tight lipped when it came to women, but Edward didn't want to keep this one to himself. He was a generally happy guy; he loved his life and what he did for a living but hockey had been almost his exclusive source of happiness in the past few years. And for the first time in a long time he had something off the ice that was making him happy. He didn't want to have to keep it all a secret.

_You could say that, yeah, _Edward responded. He didn't see the harm in telling Emmett or any of the guys on the team that he had started seeing someone. Perhaps a few of the more particular details were best kept under wraps until things with Bella got a bit more serious.

_Dude, you're either bringing home a fat check or you're not, _the goaltender quipped.

_I'm not, _Edward typed back quickly.

_You hooked up with someone didn't you? _

He laughed at how his friend's mind always went to back to one place, and how this time he was actually right.

_Yeah I guess I did. _He couldn't help but laugh as he tapped out a quick reply.

_Cullsy, you son of a bitch! When you get to the hotel I want to know height, weight, cup size, and a rating of her performance on a scale of 1 to 10. _

He was content to leave it at that for the time being but he knew his friend would definitely be wanting details once they were both on the ground. In the meantime, he logged started playing a first person shooter game with Emmett and the new kid, Garrett, while he savored the secret of his time with Bella for the final hours of his flight.

.~.~.~.~.~.

Bella needed a distraction.

She was not one of _those _girls; the type that mooned over a guy for hours on end, scribbling her name next to his and counting down the hours until he got around to picking up the phone and calling her. But within an hour of Edward's departure from her condo, she had started to feel… giddy, like there was constantly a fit of giggles at the back of her throat just waiting to escape when she least expected it.

She definitely needed a distraction and fast, so she changed into a pair of sweats, grabbed her coat and trudged off down the freshly salted sidewalks to the gym just a few blocks away.

She had hoped that a run on the treadmill would clear her head but little things all around her kept bringing her back to the thoughts she wanted to escape from. For example, there were two men about her age taking turns spotting each other at one of the weight benches set up in front of a wall of mirrors. Normally Bella could simply admire the obvious aesthetic of two well built guys and leave it at that, but this time she couldn't help but compare their bodies to Edward's.

_Edward's ass is so much better than his, _she thought before mentally slapping herself. _Yeah yeah, he's got a great ass. So does that guy, nothing special. _She cranked up the speed and ran as hard as she could for as long as she could; there was no way her clumsy body would allow her mind to focus on anything except keeping her on her feet and _not _how none of the guys in the room even remotely compared to the man who had shared her bed the night before.

Bella ran until her lungs felt like they were going to explode before finally easing the treadmill down to a cool down pace. With sweat trickling down her neck, she bypassed the attractive man at the gym's front desk, zipped up her coat and ventured back out into the frosty wind.

Though the snow had finally stopped falling and the skies had cleared, the wind was still gusting violently between the tall buildings, making traveling anywhere on foot a chore. The perspiration that still clung to her skin and hair made the cold that much more intense that is made Bella wish for the warmth and coziness of her bed as she walked. Of course, that again made her think of Edward and the heat that had radiated off of his furnace of a body during the night. With an audible grumble that made passersby glance questioningly in her direction, Bella picked up the pace so that she could get home faster and call her one close female friend, the one person she knew would understand.

.~.~.~.~.

"Girl, you have _so_ got it bad," Angela laughed into the phone. Angela had worked with Bella on the paper throughout college and had been one of the few women she felt like she could really connect with. In addition to doing the usual campus news stories, Angela wrote a weekly food column, which branched out into a popular campus blog and eventually lead to a staff writer's position at Cooking Light Magazine*. Though she worked out of her home office in the suburbs of Chicago with her photographer fiancé Ben, the magazine was published out of Birmingham, Alabama which meant that Angela traveled quite a bit and wasn't around as much as Bella would like. Truth be told, as much as Bella prided herself on being "one of the guys" in most regards, she truly missed the feminine camaraderie the two of them had always shared.

"That's just it Ang, I don't want to _have it bad_. I've got too much shit on my plate as it is. I don't need some guy coming in and… and… fucking with things," she said, exasperatedly.

"Fucking with your heart, you mean."

"I guess that does fall under the category of 'things,'" Bella replied in a grumble.

"Bella, look at your life, would you? You have everything you want: your dream job, a great place, a loving family, a close group of friends. You have what most people would kill to have in their lives, except one thing."

"Yeah yeah, the 26 year old spinster is missing out because she hasn't met someone and settled down yet."

"Hey now, don't put words in my mouth," Angela quipped back sassily. "I don't care if you never get married and decide to grow old with your 30 cats that you've named after soap opera characters. Really, if that's what you want then knock yourself out. Go ahead. But you and I both know that you don't want to be the third wheel with Ben and I forever and you definitely don't want to be that sad 45 year old woman cruising the bar scene.

"You like this guy a lot, it seems, and from what you've told me he seems to like you a lot too, so what's the harm in seeing where it goes?"

"The harm is it possibly affecting my work. He's an athlete, Ang. I know sports aren't your thing but he's important. I don't want my position at the network being called into question because of who I'm sleeping with."

"Listen B, I know you're Miss Independent and all and that's great, really, but at some point you're going to have to realize that there is more to life than success. I know that James really did a number on you—"

"Ang, can we not go there, please?" Bella interjected.

"Hang on, hear me out. I know you were pretty messed up after all of that, and you had every right to be, but that doesn't mean every guy is a jerk."

"I've known plenty of nice guys."

"Ok so why haven't you dated any?"

"Because I just… haven't, I don't know."

"My point is you'll never know what kind of person this guy is if you don't put yourself out there. Nothing worth having isn't worth fighting for."

"Did you get that out of a fortune cookie or something?" she mumbled.

"Yeah something like that," Angela laughed back. "Just don't shut yourself off from the possibility of happiness, Bella. That's all I'm trying to say."

Bella sighed and flopped down onto her bed that still smelled like him.

"Maybe you're right. He's just… he's so… okay, I'm going to have a girl moment, don't freak out."

Angela laughed heartily at her friend. "Those moments are few and far between. I'll keep the freaking out to a minimum."

Bella then proceeded to gush about Edward; how sexy he was, how great he was in bed, how he had told her she was perfect and beautiful, how she couldn't get him out of her head. She even told Angela, for the first time in their 8 year friendship, about the first time she met him and how she'd purposely buried her feelings for him until they had found each other again only recently. She told her about their tryst in the locker room at the United Center and how thrilling it all had been. Angela, like a good friend, just listened and asked simple questions to keep the story moving along when necessary.

"Well," she said once Bella had brought her up to speed, "it sounds like you just need to let him know that you're thinking about him and see where it goes from here."

Bella was glad that she'd made the decision to open up to Angela. Why she hadn't done it sooner, she didn't know. Perhaps she thought that admitting how much Edward had truly meant to her for all these years was a sign of weakness, but the more she thought about it the more that idea seemed silly; Angela was completely and whole heartedly in love with Ben and she was one of the strongest people Bella knew.

_Feelings are not a weakness, _Bella thought to herself as she hung up the phone. _Who knew?_

A raw, uninhibited smile spread across her face as she picked up her phone again to send Edward a text.

_I miss you already._

* * *

><p>Lemony fluff. Gotta love it.<p>

Please review! Even if you just leave a note telling me how much you hated it, remember to tip your server. =)

Thanks guys, you are all fantastic!

* Alternate Captain - A teamcaptain wears an uppercase "C" above and to the right of the team logo on their sweater (although a few NHL teams have the uppercase letter above and to the left of the team logo). Two other players, designated alternate captains, wear an uppercase "A" on theirs. The Alternate captains are meant to take on a leadership role along side the captain or when the captain is unable to fulfill his duties.

* Cooking Light Magazine- afood and lifestyle magazine founded in 1987. Each month, the magazine includes approximately 100 original recipes as well as editorial content covering food trends, fitness tips, and other culinary and health-related news. The magazine is published by Birmingham, Alabama-based Southern Progress Corporation.


	5. Screwed

Ladies (and gentlemen?) I first offer my sincerest apologies for the delay. There was a major crisis at work which has kept me wrapped up for quite a while. However... HERE WE ARE! YAY!

Congrats to the Boston Bruins for winning the Stanley Cup! Want to see a set of killer abs? Google Tyler Seguin. Do it, you know you want to. You'll thank me later ;)

**I do not own Twilight, but hot hockey players are all mine. ALL OF THEM =)**

**Playlist: The Best Day by Atmosphere**

* * *

><p>"So is she smart?" Emmett asked as he and Edward hopped over the wall in front of the away bench clad in full gear and black and gray practice uniforms the next day.<p>

"Yeah, of course she is," Edward replied, a little puzzled by his question. Emmett was never one to put much emphasis on intelligence when it came to his women. "I mean, we went to college together and she's moving up quickly at the network and-"

"No Cullsy, is she _smart?_" the goaltender emphasized the word and held his massive hands in front of his chest.

"Give me a fucking break, Mac! This is my girlfriend we're talking about here. You can't ask me shit like that." Edward tried to be angry with his friend's crude question but it was such an inherently Emmett thing to do that his annoyance didn't last long.

"I seriously can't believe you're off the market, dude. Who the hell is going to be my wing man now?" Emmett glided over to the net and stood between the pipes as coach Banner emptied a sack of heavy rubber pucks onto the ice in front of Edward and the line of other waiting players.

"Whitlock," he said with a grunt as he let a puck fly wide off the blade of his stick and smack against the glass behind the net.

"Too soft. Jazz can never lie to chicks. Come on, is that all you've got?" Emmett growled back.

Jasper skated to the front of the line and lined up his shot.

"I guess I should be mad that you think I'm soft, but you also think that I'm a decent human being who doesn't lie, so I guess it evens out," he laughed and launched a shot that struck Emmett's mask directly over his mouth.

"Take the new kid, show him what it's like to be playing with the big boys now," Jasper suggested as he skated to the back of the line.

"That's an idea. He's a little wet behind the ears, but chicks will think he's cute… like a puppy or some shit. What'dyou say, Lafleur?" Mac stood upright in the net and addressed the latest addition to the team as he approached the front of the shooting line.

"You want to use me like a puppy? Nah man, I think I'll pass." Garrett whizzed a puck over Emmett's shoulder that landed deftly in the back of the net.

"You turn me down _and _you score on me? Not a great way to get on my good side, kid."

"Don't sweat it man, I'll wing it for you," brawny defenseman Warren Boucher chimed in as he lumbered to the front of the line. Tall and menacing with a hulking frame, Boucher had a reputation for playing less than scrupulously and was generally disliked by most of the players in the league outside of his team. His shots were hard but his hits were harder and everyone knew it. "Chicks dig a _bad boy," _he laughed heartily.

"Yeah Bash, you and me all the way. We'll show these guys how it's done, how real men live the dream and bag chicks from coast to coast." Emmett skated out of the crease* to bump helmets with Boucher as the both grunted in a prehistoric manner.

"Back in line, Boucher," Coach called after a sharp blast from his whistle. "Though I'm sure Cullen's personal life is very interesting, I need your heads in the game. This isn't a team that we see very often so we need to be on our toes and ready to adapt at a moment's notice. So let's keep the locker room talk where it should be, shall we gentleman?"

"Sorry coach," Emmett growled, snapping his focus back to the ice and taking his ready stance between the pipes.

Edward and Jasper exchanged meaningful glances before laughing softly like teenagers.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Bella leaned back in her office chair and rubbed her eyes. She had been scanning the network's discussion boards for content that could be used for broadcast and it was beginning to make her brain hurt. She'd been at it for so long that she'd barely realized that the sun had almost completely slipped behind the buildings causing an ominous, though intrinsically beautiful, play of shadows across the city. She groaned and stretched as she checked the time; there was just enough time for her to get home to see the puck drop at Edward's game.

_I'm going to check just one more thing then I'll head home. _

No sooner had the thought passed through her mind; there was a knock at her office door.

"Hey Bella," Mike said with a warm smile as he poked his head through her door. "Staying late tonight?"

"No, just leaving actually," she smiled back.

"Great, do you want to join Riley and me for a drink? You've been working so hard lately, it's my treat."

Bella captured her lower lip between her teeth as she took another fretful glance at the clock.

_I could have a quick drink and make it home for the second period, _she thought. Mike was always so nice to her and she really hated to turn down an invitation from him.

"Sure Mike, that sounds great. Let me just grab my things," she replied with another smile.

"I'll meet you out here when you're ready," he said with a wave as he shut her office door behind him.

Bella sighed deeply as she shut down her computer and pulled on her wool coat and knit hat in preparation for venturing into the cold. As she emerged from her office she saw Mike, his on-air partner Riley St. James and Jessica waiting in front of the elevators in the office lobby.

"There she is," Riley said jovially. "Everybody ready?"

The women nodded just as the elevator doors slid open and the group embarked for their ride down. They nodded to the night watchman on the ground floor as they marched out into the breathtakingly cold evening.

Luckily there was a small, family owned sports bar just a few blocks down the road and they ducked into it quickly after the short trip.

"Two pitchers and four glasses," Mike said politely to the waitress as she approached our pub table. She nodded with a grin and hurried off behind the bar, eager to earn a good tip.

"Ladies, I just wanted to make sure that you know that we see how hard you both are working," Mike said good-naturedly to his female companions as the waitress returned with the pitchers of light beer and began pouring them into the waiting frosty glasses with an expert hand. "Jessica, you keep our heads on straight. If we didn't have you, I'm sure Riley and I wouldn't know if we were coming or going. And Bella," he took a deep breath and chuckled.

"Bella is our backbone," Riley chimed in. "You make sure we don't look like idiots on the air. You bust your ass day in and day out just to make us look good. I think I speak for both of us when I say I don't know where we'd be without you." The men raised their newly filled glasses in tribute to the women. "Thank you, ladies. Really."

Jessica smiled widely from ear to ear and Bella noticed her making eyes, ever so convertly, at Mike across the top of her glass as she took her frist sip. Bella glanced curiously between them as she took a sip of her own only to find Mike returning Jessica's flirtatious stare.

_Huh, _she thought to herself. _That's new. _

She then glanced across the table at Riley to see if he showed any sign of noticing what was going on between their coworkers only to find him giving her a look she was not accustomed to from him.

Perhaps in another life a look like that from someone like Riley wouldn't have been unwelcome. He was a bit older than her, a bachelor of 31, and not bad looking by any means. He was tall and lanky though she'd seen him display feats of strength around the office that seemed uncharacteristic for his size that intrigued her. His hair was sandy colored and cut neatly close to his ears. His eyes were a deep, rich brown and gave off a warm intensity. He was intelligent and successful, charming and friendly. Again, a flirtatious glance from someone like Riley a month ago wouldn't have been unwelcome at all, but now it made her uncomfortable. She averted her eyes quickly trying to deny that she had even seen it at all and settled on one of the many televisions hung from the walls of the bar.

She choked on her beer and began spluttering unattractively when she saw Edward's striking face being broadcast in high definition across the room.

"Bella, are you alright?" Riley asked, suddenly by her side.

She swallowed painfully and animatedly fanned herself with her hand in an effort to calm down.

"Yeah I'm fine, thank you. Just went down the wrong pipe," she said with a tight smile.

"That guy, I swear—why this city is still in love with him I'll never understand," Riley commented as he caught sight of Bella watching the television behind the bar.

"Oh come on!" Mike laughed. "Cullen couldn't help where he got drafted. I'm sure if he played for the Hawks you'd love him just like everybody else."

"Yeah, but he doesn't," Riley went on. "And besides, doesn't he just seem like a cocky ass to you? I haven't met the guy, but I mean… look at him. That smile, that 'I can get any chick I want' grin, makes me want to just punch him in the mouth the first chance I get."

"It sounds like your hatred of him has nothing to do with his playing and everything to do with the fact that he has a more active sex life than you do," Mike laughed, reaching up and slinging an arm playfully around his partner's shoulders.

Bella's face flamed, and indignation licked at her insides. She knew better than anyone that fans, even people in the business, could and would say callous things about players. Normally comments like that wouldn't have bothered her, but this was different.

"He's actually a really nice guy," she said with an authority in her voice she was unaware she could muster.

"Oh come on Bella, not you too." Riley slumped back onto his bar stool and took another sip of his drink in exasperation. "I'll give the guy credit, he's explosive off the block, has great stick handling, and can definitely score goals—"

"Which is what a professional hockey player is supposed to do," Mike interjected matter-of-factly.

"Yeah but… he just fucking bugs me, I don't know what it is about him. And don't tell me he's a nice guy, Bella. He probably goes through 10 girls like you a week."

Bella took several long swallows of her drink before responding to calm her rising anger. She liked Riley and didn't want to create tension between the two of them at the office but she also wanted to say what was truly on her mind without laying all of her cards out on the table.

"Actually," she began with a sweet, though artificially so, smile. "I know him, we're… friends. We went to college together and he really _is_ a very nice, genuine guy."

"Oh, well…" Riley ran his hand nervously over the back of his neck. "You know how passionate I am about this stuff, Bella. And I hate the Pens*, and he's—"

"Riley, it's fine," she said, her face softening.

"So you know him, really?" Jessica asked, finally jumping into the conversation.

"Yeah, Bella. Why didn't we know about this? You could have interviewed him when I sent you out on assignment last week," Mike said. Bella's cheeks flamed again.

Had it only been a week since that fateful night? The night that she really had been trying to get an interview with Edward but has turned out to be one of the most exciting night of her life. She'd had to throw a story together at the last minute, rehashing stats and details and tell Mike that the poor quality of the write up was due to her lack of preparation on such short notice. _Certainly not because I spent the time I should have been using to conduct an interview to fuck the interviewee. _She bit back the sarcastic comment at her own expense and kept going.

"I don't really like to mix my personal life with business. Besides, he was already gone by the time I got there."

"Really? I heard reports that nobody saw him get on the bus for the airport with the rest of the team. That's weird."

Bella felt herself beginning to break out into a cold sweat.

"Huh, that is odd. I'll have to ask him about that," she said coolly, trying to cover her own unease.

"Yeah, do that. I'm curious." Mike signaled to the waitress to bring another round.

"Actually guys, I think I'm going to head out. Thanks for the drink though," she said with a tight smile and began buttoning her coat.

"I'll uh— I'll walk you back to the office," Riley offered, grabbing his own coat off of the back of his stool.

"No, Riley. Really, I'm fine. Why don't you stay and hang out. I'll just see you guys tomorrow."

"Bella, please. My mother would skin me alive if she knew I let a woman walk the streets of Chicago alone after dark."

Suppressing a groan and trying her best not to let her annoyance with him show, Bella silently agreed to Riley's request and set off back toward the office with him at her side.

She was thankful for the fact that the weather had turned foul again and the wind had picked up which made small talk between the two of them nearly impossible as they trudged back up the well traveled sidewalk. Four blocks later they ducked back into the building lobby to take refuge from the chill for a moment and for Bella to pull her keys from her purse.

"Listen, Bella," Riley started, his voice echoing slightly off of the tall windows and marble floors. I'm sorry if I offended you earlier, I – I didn't know that you knew Cullen and—"

"Riley, its fine. Water under the bridge, really. Don't worry about it," she replied with a flippant wave of her hand.

"Listen I… I really like you, Bella. I mean, we're great here at the office but I mean… I… shit, I haven't gotten any better at this than I was as a teenager," he laughed nervously, almost to himself. "What I'm trying to say is that I like you Bella, and I'd like for us to maybe hang out sometime… just us. Would… would that be okay?" He shuffled nervously from foot to foot and could barely meet her eyes.

It really was a shame Riley hadn't mustered the nerve to ask her out a week prior, or things would have been very different. But now she had the dubious job of letting him down gently; a task she had never been good at in the past.

"Look, Riley… I think you're great but…"

"But," he sighed, sarcastically.

"I sort of just started seeing someone. It's really new and I don't really know where it's going…" she trailed off. She felt horrible for having to turn him down and felt the need to soften the blow. "I mean, I don't even know if it's serious yet or not."

As soon as the words left her mouth she wished she could take them back because she saw the glint in Riley's eye.

"If it's not serious we could still have dinner sometime, right?"

_Shit, shit, shit! Just say no. Tell him you don't feel comfortable dating inside the work place. Tell him something!_

"Umm… sure, I guess dinner would be okay."

_I'm an idiot. _

Riley's face lit up like a Roman candle. "Great! Tomorrow night, after work?"

_Complete and total idiot! _

Edward's face flashed through her mind in all its Adonis like glory and her stomach dropped.

In his excitement, Riley didn't even wait for her to answer before pulling her into a quick hug.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Bella," he said brightly.

She was dazed and confused. _Did that really just happen? Did I really just agree to go on a date with him?_

"Riley wait, I—" but he was already through the door and back out into the snow.

_I am so screwed._

* * *

><p>Uh oh...<p>

_* _The Crease the semi-curcular area with a 6 foot radius in front of the opening of the goal; denotes the playing area of the goaltender within which the attacking players must not obstruct his movement or vision.

* The Pens is a nickname for the Pittsburgh Penguins


	6. When there is a girl involved

Holy crap, it has been a while, hasn't it? I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I've started prereading 3 different fics for SparklyRedPen[dot]com (head over there for all of your Prereading and Betaing needs!) and that has taken up a lot of my time. Regardless... here were are with another installment. Enjoy!

P.S A Big thanks goes out to the folks over at The Twilight Awards for featuring this story as one of their Under the Radar must reads!

**I do not own Twilight, but hot hockey players are all mine. ALL OF THEM! =)**

**Playlist: White Winter Hymnal by Fleet Foxes **

* * *

><p>"Did you catch any of the game?" Edward asked, riding to the airport on the team bus.<p>

"Of course I did," she replied with a smile, the sticky situation she'd put herself in earlier in the evening burying itself in the recesses of her mind.

"So… what did you think?" His question seemed almost giddy with excitement.

"You don't want to know what I think. I'm sure you've heard it all from Banner, the trainers, everyone. You don't need me weighing in too," she said sleepily.

"You're a sportswriter. Whether you're my girlfriend or not, I still value your professional opinion."

Bella's heart both skipped a beat and sank at his choice of words. He had said that she was his girlfriend, a label that crushed any lingering doubt she may have had about his willingness to actually attempt a relationship with her, but also meant that she was absolutely off limits to any other would be suitors and it made her feel sick about the situation with Riley.

"Bella? You still there?" he asked.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm here," she said, snapping herself out of her musing. "Um… well, I'll be honest, I missed the beginning of the first period but I noticed that you were really explosive off the block. You and Whitlock have great chemistry on the first line; you guys always have. That new winger, Lafluer needs to be more present though; he's about two seconds behind on every shift* and he has to constantly play catch up. He's tiring himself out and if he keeps it up he won't be able to make it to the third period against a team like Boston or Philly."

Bella stopped her analysis when she heard Edward laughing heartily into the phone.

"You're too good to be true," he sighed. "Most guys ask their girlfriends, 'How'd I do, honey?' and they say, 'You did great, dear!' Not you. No,_ you_ give me a full play-by-play breakdown and ways to improve," he continued on, chuckling. "I love it."

She laughed back in spite of herself. She was just glad that Edward wasn't intimidated by the fact that she knew as much about his sport as he did.

"We're about to board and I'd rather not have the guys listening in on our conversations. Can I text you?"

"Of course," she replied with a yawn.

"I promise I won't keep you up all night," he said with a smile in his voice. "I'll let you know as soon as we're up in the air."

The line went dead and Bella lay back on her bed for a moment to allow the fresh waves of giddiness wash over her. At this point, there really was no use in trying to suppress the giggles and childlike squeals that Edward brought forth from her.

After slipping downstairs to pour herself a glass of wine to relax, Bella settled into the plush blankets of her bed, turned her television to a late night talk show and proceeded to continue her conversation with Edward via text message for nearly the entire duration of his flight.

When he no longer had to worry about his teammates eavesdropping on what he had to say, his comments became more and more flirtatious and suggestive. Not that Bella minded in the slightest; Edward made her feel sexy and alive in a way that she hadn't felt in years, perhaps ever. She had spent the majority of her adult life closed off from others, not allowing herself to feel fully for anyone or anything, and now she was making up for lost time.

He described in great detail how much the mere thought of her turned him on, how he'd had to block her from his mind completely in order to be able to do his best on the ice that night. He told her how the memory of how it felt to feel her entire body climaxing around him was enough to send him over the edge. Bella shivered at his words, an indescribable icy warmth spreading out across her entire body as her imagination conjured up his velvety voice whispering the words into her ear.

As the night drew on into the early morning and both of their responses became further and further apart, Edward finally bid Bella goodnight and promised to call her soon.

She flipped off her bedside light and fell asleep in amazement that blinking words on a screen could set her body ablaze so easily, all because they were from him.

Bella awoke with a smile on her face the next morning and she dressed quickly without a care in the world. It was only when she arrived in the lobby of her building a few minutes earlier than usual did she remember the situation that awaited her up on the 16th floor.

She hoped that she could simply talk to Riley and explain, without giving away too many details, that she didn't feel comfortable going on a date with someone else when she had already committed to dating another, or perhaps she should just tell him that interoffice dating was inappropriate. Yes, that was the route she'd take. Riley was a sensible man, there was no way that he wouldn't agree that their seeing each other romantically was a bad idea.

Absent-mindedly, Bella boarded the elevator and pressed the button for her floor. As the door began to slide closed, an exasperated voice from the lobby called out for her to hold the elevator. She extended her arm and held the door for a young man in his late teens carrying a large bouquet of beautiful, fragrant flowers.

"Thanks," he panted. "I'm running a little behind this morning. I had strict instructions to have these flowers waiting for the lucky lady when she got into the office this morning. I hope I'm not too late."

"That's nice," she said robotically, not really listening to him. "What floor?"

"Sixteen."

Bella's heart shuddered to a halt before restarting at a thundering pace. _No, no, no! _she raged to herself. _It can't be! I said one date and he's already sending me flowers? Holy shit, this is worse than I thought. No, they have got to be for Jessica. Maybe they're from Mike. God, I hope they're from Mike. _

The ride up seemed to be taking far longer than normal as she eyed the vase filled with at least two dozen red roses suspiciously. The bell chimed and she stepped off of the elevator in tandem with the young man.

"Do you work here?" he asked.

"Mmmhmm," she said with a wild nod.

"Good, would you mind signing for these? And can you tell me which office belongs to Bella Swan?"

_Fuck, fuck, FUCK! _

"Umm… th-that's me, actually. I'll just take them."

She signed his clipboard and rushed into her office to hide.

_I'll just stay in here… all day… I've got to keep myself busy and stay away from Riley… maybe he'll just take a hint… Just be cool about it and everything will be fine. _

_Looking forward to a lovely evening, and hopefully seeing much more of you – Riley, _the card read in cold, mechanical script.

After placing the vase on top of a low bookcase out of her line of sight from her desk, Bella pulled herself together and resigned herself to having as normal of a work day as possible.

An hour passed and not a single person had so much as knocked on her door and she was beginning to relax. Her email had been checked, phone calls had been returned, and she was beginning work on an editorial piece on the current NCAA* football season with an emphasis on rising stars at the quarterback position. Elbow deep in schedules and research, Bella was jolted out of her own thoughts by a robust rapping on her office door.

"Shit," she said, practically jumping from her seat.

"Knock knock," Riley greeted cheerfully, opening the door without invitation. Bella mustered a polite smile but stopped cold when she saw him carrying another large bouquet of flowers. But this time, instead of roses the bouquet was filled with dozens of soft white and deep purple orchids. "At the risk of seeming too forward, I got you flowers, Bella. I hope you don't mind. Though there seems to have been a mix up at the florist. These aren't what I ordered, but they're nice all the same." He placed the glass vase down on her desk and grinned proudly down at her.

Perplexed, Bella glanced back and forth between the roses in the corner and the impressive array of orchids in front of her.

"Honestly, you pay someone to do one simple thing and they can't seem to get it right," he went on.

"Hey Bella, I need your signature on these documents," Jessica said brightly, her blonde curls bouncing in rhythm with her spirited steps. "Wow, you're popular today. Is there an occasion?"

"Umm…no," she replied, clearing her throat uncomfortably. "Just a regular Wednesday."

Riley followed her eye line to the roses across the room and cocked an eyebrow at the flowers before him.

"Riley, are these from you? You've got great taste," Jessica said with a smile and a wink before plucking the card from the orchids and reading it aloud;

"_I said I wouldn't keep you up all night, but I did anyway. I hope these are a small consolation and you're not too tired_. Wow, Riley," she laughed, elbowing him in the arm. "_Can't wait to see you again, -EC. _EC?"

Bella felt her face blaze and her blood flash boil beneath her skin.

Jessica, immediately sensing that things were not as they should be, swallowed thickly and dropped the signature documents on Bella's desk before retreating back to the reception area.

Riley let out mirthless chuckle and rocked back onto his heels.

"Up all night? You must really be tired today. You may want to think about dipping out early to sleep it off," he said acridly before turning and making a hasty exit.

_Oh for fuck's sake… _she thought, rolling her eyes. In the blink of an eye she had gone from feeling sorry for Riley, sorry for having to let him down, to being incredibly annoyed at his presumptuous behavior.

_I was perfectly clear with him last night! _she raged internally. _He knew I was seeing someone else, and he goes and gets mad because the other guy _that he knew about _sent me flowers the same day he did? What kind of bullshit is that? _Her building anger prevented her from immediately running to Riley's office and setting things straight. Instead, she pounded away at her keyboard, furious that a sweet gesture from Edward could be so easily spoiled by a grown man's immaturity.

Two hours later, Bella's frustration had begun to ebb and she began feeling remorseful for getting to easily riled. The tension on the office floor was palpable and everyone seemed to be trying to keep their distance from her that morning. Jessica hadn't even come by again with her usual offer to make a coffee run. It was just as well, she was really in no mood to be sociable.

Even though she had begun to feel bad for her reaction to Riley's actions, it wasn't until Edward sent her an innocent text that she made any move to alleviate the situation.

_Did the beautiful woman get the beautiful flowers I sent her today?_

With a sigh she tapped out a quick response and told him that she couldn't talk then, but desperately needed to talk to him later that night. He asked if everything was alright, which she assured him it was.

With a relenting sigh, Bella swallowed her pride, squared her shoulders and made her way down the hall to Riley's office to discuss the situation like adults.

.~.~.~.~.~.

Bella had said she was fine but Edward wasn't convinced.

_Yes, everything's okay. I just can't talk right now, but I really need to talk to you tonight. I'll call you later. Promise. _

Something seemed off, and it was times like these that he wished he knew more about her and her everyday life. He had no way of knowing if she was just stressed because of a deadline, or if she was having friend or family troubles, or even if it was something else entirely. Whatever it was, when a woman says "We need to talk," Edward knew it could never be good.

On a razor's edge of anxiety, he set about making himself an egg white omelet for lunch. Despite the gourmet kitchen in his spacious townhome, his cooking skills were limited to breakfast fair. During the season he had to stick to lean protean and vegetables, so loaded egg dishes were on his menu at least 4 days a week.

His mind mulled over all the possible reasons why it would be imperative for Bella to speak with him, and he was only coming up with the absolute worst possibilities.

As he was polishing off his plate of eggs, his phone buzzed from the kitchen counter. Hopeful that it was Bella putting him out of his misery sooner rather than later, he practically vaulted over the bar and barked a barely intelligible greeting into the phone receiver.

"Well hello to you too," Jasper chuckled into the phone.

"Sorry dude, chick stress. What's up?"

"Stressed out already? What have you got to be stressed about?"

"I sent her flowers today and when I texted her to make sure she got them she said she couldn't talk but _needed _to talk to me later. What the hell does that even mean?"

"Cullsy, you're getting yourself worked up over nothing, man."

"Jazz, you don't understand. She's… skittish. She's run away before and I just don't want her to think I'm rushing things or… fuck dude, I wish she hadn't said anything at all so I wouldn't have to sit here and wonder all day," Edward said in a huff.

"Yeah well, that's what women do, isn't it? Speaking of women, I need your advice on something."

"I don't know if I'm the best person to ask at the moment, but shoot."

"You're the only one who isn't married or just looking for a piece of ass, so you're all I've got right now. I met a girl who's … kind of perfect for me… except not at all. It's so fucked up. You know the other night when it was raining so hard, and then it was freezing rain? I'd gone over to Southpointe* to practice some drills on my own and I was on my way home when I see this car pulled over on the shoulder with the hood up. I never stop for things like that but this time I did. I didn't think about it, I just stopped. And there was this girl just staring at the engine when I walked up to her and she looks at me and says, 'I've been waiting for you all night.' I mean, normally I would have thought that was some scary, serial killer shit, but from her… I don't know, it didn't seem weird.

"Anyway, I have no idea what I thought I could do to help her; I didn't have any tools or anything in my car and even if I did it was fucking freezing out there. So I tell her that I'll call a tow truck and have it towed to a mechanic I use and I can give her a lift wherever she needs to go. Without even batting an eye, she says that she wants me to take her to get some coffee. What the hell was I supposed to say? No? No, man, even out in the rain she was really fucking cute.

"So we get in my car and drive to the nearest coffee shop, but by that point it was after 10 and it was closed. I don't know what I was thinking but I suggest that I can make her coffee back at my place and she says yes. She actually said yes! Once we get back to my house, we drink coffee and she just sort of… hung out, like, all night. We talked, and nothing happened but Jesus Christ, dude… I can't get her out of my head."

"Does this girl have a name?"

"Alice. She's an event planner for some big company here in town. You know what the best part was though, Cullsy?"

"What?"

"She had no idea who I was. Not a clue. I mean, if she did, she sure didn't let on. It was nice to just be… anonymous for a change."

"That's great man. It's been a while since you've had somebody steady. Are you going to see her again?"

"Yeah, I'm seeing her tonight actually. Do you think I'm crazy, dude? Seriously. I've dated my fair share of girls but Alice… she's just different. I don't know, I mean, I've never just looked at someone and felt drawn to them. There's just something about her."

"No, Jazz. You're not crazy," Edward chuckled to his friend. "It's the same way I feel about Bella. She was just someone I _had_ to know."

"Good," he laughed back. "I just needed to tell me that I wasn't losing my mind."

After a bit more light conversation, Edward ended his phone call with Jasper and went upstairs to his modest home gym.

He flipped on the television that hung on the wall and set out at a moderate pace on treadmill. As he pushed himself harder and harder, he felt his conviction reaffirmed. Whatever it was, Bella was worth fighting for. Whatever it was, it wasn't going to stand in their way.

.~.~.~.~.

"Riley, may I speak with you for a minute?" Bella asked tentatively, poking her head through Riley's office door.

"Sure, why not?" he answered without so much as a glance up at her.

With a sigh, she slipped into the office and shut the door behind her.

"About this morning…"

"What about this morning, Bella?" he snapped, finally looking at her with a spiteful glint in his eye.

"There was a misunderstanding and-"

"What exactly was there to misunderstand?"

"If you would let me finish a sentence, Riley, I'll be happy to explain." Bella struggled to keep her voice even.

"Fine," he replied with a sigh. "Explain away."

"Thank you," she said with a terse smile. "When you asked me to have dinner with you, did I not tell you explicitly that I was seeing someone already?"

"Yes, I suppose you did," he said in a short, clipped tone.

"Then what reason did you have to behave the way you did this morning? I hate to say it Riley, but it was extremely unprofessional and, frankly, it reinforced my initial hesitation to allow our relationship to be anything but professional."

Dumbfounded, Riley glared at Bella from across his desk without saying a word.

"Look, you are a great guy, Riley." He interrupted her with an indignant huff. "You really are. I'm not just saying that. It's just… we work together and things can't get awkward around here. You, me, Mike… we work too closely for anything to come between that, you know? You agree don't you?"

Bella leaned against the side of his desk and looked down at him pleadingly.

"Yeah," Riley finally sighed. "Yeah, I guess I agree."

"We've got a great thing going, right? Why screw that up?"

"Alright, alright. Maybe you're right. I just… I really like you, Bella. I have for a while now, and…"

"I know, I'm sorry. I never should have even said yes- not that I wouldn't want to, but… you understand."

"Yeah, I understand. When you said you were seeing someone already, I guess I just got jealous. I don't know. My ego got in the way. I thought… whoever it was… I could lure you away. Hell, I don't know, Bella. Guys can do some pretty dumb ass things when there is a girl involved," he said, rising from his desk and standing directly in front of her.

"It's new and-"

"Bella, you don't have to explain anything to me. Whoever this EC guy is, he's a lucky son of a bitch," he said with a smile. "I'm sorry I acted like an ass this morning."

"It's alright. Are we cool?" she asked.

"Of course." Riley smiled one more time down at her before pulling her into a cordial hug. "Come on, now help me find something to talk about on the air this afternoon, will ya?"

Together, Bella and Riley poured over the day's dealings in all areas of sports; notable highlights, suspensions, business dealings, in an effort to fill the 4 hours of airtime for Riley and Mike's afternoon show.

With a groan and a stretch, Bella stood up from where she'd been sitting on the other side of Riley's desk.

"I'm going to go grab something to eat, do you want anything?" she asked.

"No, I'm fine… actually, would you mind bringing me a coke or something?"

"Sure, no problem," she said with a smile, pleased that they could continue working together without any noticeable tension. She happily walked out of his office and down the hall to the elevators.

Meanwhile, Riley continued to track a story of a rumored trade of from the Blackhawks to the Penguins.

_Amidst tensions with upper level management, Chicago defenseman Demitri Vance is in possible talks to make a career-changing move to Pittsburgh. His fate is unclear due to his history with Pittsburgh Assistant Captain, Edward Cullen. The widely publicized war of words between the two veterans is undoubtedly weighing heavily on Vance's decision considering the level of communication between the two will be crucial for a newly reformed Penguins team to make another run for Lord Stanley's Cup._

Riley St. James sat back in his desk chair and mulled the headline over in his head.

_Edward Cullen… EC…? _

* * *

><p><em>*<em>Shift - There are 6 players players from each team on the ice at any given time during a game (3 forwards, 2 defensemen, 1 goaltender) each time one of those groups leaves the ice for another player to take their place, it is called a shift. The average length of time of a shift is 40-50 seconds for a forward, 60-75 seconds for a defenseman, and typically the goaltender will stay in for the duration of the game, unless he is pulled for some reason.

_*_NCAA - National Collegiate Athletic Association

*Duncan Keith (born July 16, 1983) is a Canadian professional ice hockey defenseman who is an alternate captain for the Chicago Blackhawks. Keith was drafted 54th overall by Chicago in the 2002 NHL entry draft.


	7. The Brunette Reporter

If you've made it this far and haven't read the one shot, The One that got Away, you may want to consider going back and reading that. It'll be important and you'll see why :) The one shot was also nominated for an Emerging Swan Award for Best Edward & Bella, so please go over there to vote and check out the other nominees! emergingswanawards [dot] blogspot [dot] com

**I do not own Twilight, but hot hockey players are all mine. ALL OF THEM =) **

**Playlist: Beggin' by Madcon**

* * *

><p>"So I said yes, and I shouldn't have, and I'm sorry. I just don't know how to say no, Edward. Besides… I'm used to being single so if someone ever did ask me out I didn't <em>have <em>to say no, but I regretted it as soon as it happened. And I only said yes because I didn't want tell have to tell him _why _I was saying no. Not that I'm ashamed of you or being with you or anything like that, I just…" Bella was babbling and she knew it but she couldn't stop the steady stream of words from coming from her mouth. "And when I came in this morning there were these flowers from him and then he intercepted _your _flowers and he got all pissed off and acted like a spoiled brat—"

"Bella," Edward laughed. "Let me get this straight, your coworker asked you out and you said yes?"

"Yes," she replied meekly after a long, pregnant pause.

"But you said yes because you thought that by telling the truth it would be an… occupational hazard?"

"Yes," she said again.

"And this is what you _needed_ to talk to me about?"

"Yes."

"Shit, Bella. You almost gave me a heart attack!" he laughed heartily.

"So… you're not mad?" she asked hesitantly.

"I'd have been pretty upset if you had actually gone out on a date with this guy, but no, I'm not mad. Maybe it's because I was thinking that maybe you had changed your mind about things."

Edward's relief was palpable. Though the thought of Bella even being approached by another man wasn't exactly his idea of "good news", anything at this point was better than having her get cold feet.

"No," she sighed with relief. "I haven't changed my mind about anything. In fact, I think the little fiasco today sort of solidified how I feel about the whole thing."

"And how exactly do you feel about it, Bella?" he asked with a smirk in his voice.

"Well," she began in a low, seductive tone that she knew that he loved. "I think you know, but I think you just want to hear me say it."

"Maybe I do."

"Mmhmm. I thought so. You just want to hear me say that I couldn't be happier that we… _ran into each other," _she giggled.

"That's a start," he replied playfully.

"Should I go on? Hmm… I guess you also want to hear me say how I can't stop thinking about you, huh? How you're the first thing I think about in the morning and the last thing I think about before I go to sleep? How the thought of you drives me crazy?" She bit her lip and slid down into the welcoming plush of her sofa.

"All good things, . All very good things," he replied smoothly.

"Very good things, I agree. Things that have been making it hard for me to concentrate at work these past few days. I hope you're happy," she giggled again.

"Aww… now I'd hate to be affecting your work performance. You're the next great sports media mogul, after all."

She let out a deep, throaty laugh at that made his dick twitch.

"Oh yeah, that's me alright."

"Hey, you never know. With me at your side baby, there isn't anything we couldn't do. I say we take over the world." Edward grinned from ear to ear at the thought.

500 miles away, Bella smiled at the idea as well. She couldn't get over the fact that this man, this amazingly gorgeous, sexy, athletic, intelligent man, was too good to be true. At this point, she had yet to find a flaw in him whatsoever, and it boggled her mind.

"World domination? Is that on Edward Cullen's to-do list, post on-ice career?" she asked, playfully.

"Maybe, but you didn't hear that from me. Stick with me, kid; you'll have everything you could ever want and more."

Bella's heart fluttered at his words. Granted her experience with men was fairly limited for someone her age, but she had never had any of them say such fairy tale things to her before. She didn't want to get her heart set on something that wasn't attainable, but deep in her bones Bella longed for forever. And she longed for it with Edward. This was a stunning revelation to her because, though she'd never anticipated any of her previous boyfriends to just be a placeholder in her life, she realized that she'd never felt this way for any of them. And the fact that she felt this way for Edward after such a short time made her feel like she was balancing atop a razor's edge of emotion, teetering back and forth between safety and risk.

"Bella," he whispered huskily. "When can you come see me?"

"Y-you want me to come see you?" she stammered, jarring herself from her thoughts.

"Of course I do," he laughed. "I'll warn you though, I might not let you leave."

"I'll umm… check my schedule… I think I might be able to get away for a few days maybe next weekend?"

"That would be perfect. If I remember correctly, we've got home games Friday and Saturday, but I think I'm completely off Sunday and Monday. I'll get you a Cullen jersey and officially get you a seat in the WAGs box. You can be my little personal cheerleader," he joked.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," she laughed back. "If I'm going to a game I don't want to be in a box. I want to be down near the action. I'm not covering the game so I want to be a fan for once."

"Add this to the ever growing list of reasons why you are _the most_ perfect woman on the planet."

.~.~.~.~.~.

The old house in the Chicago neighborhood of Jefferson Park groaned and creaked under the force of yet another blustery, snowy winter night. The house was far too large for just one occupant but it had been purchased in the hopes of filling it with a wife and children one day. Riley thought he'd found his perfect match but he had been wrong; Bella didn't see him that way and didn't return his feelings.

Having gotten his hopes up only to have them crash back down again was bad enough but the thought that the reason, _the only reason, _why she wouldn't have him is because her time was already being occupied by _him, _again,was too much to handle.

_Edward fucking Cullen_; Chicago's golden boy who abandoned his own city for a paycheck.

Riley had met him a few times throughout his career; first on his inaugural assignment with the network when Cullen had been just a promising young athlete. Riley had tried to gain exclusive access to him then but Cullen had completely blown him off. He knew that he shouldn't take it personally; student athletes were incredibly busy and had limited time to give to the press as it was, but ever since that day Riley had had a bitter taste in his mouth whenever the phenom was mentioned.

His distaste had only grown deeper as the years had passed. He watched Cullen hoist the Stanley Cup over his head. He watched Cullen's salary increase exponentially as his performance continued to improve. He watched two cities, Chicago and Pittsburgh, fall all over themselves with pride for some stupid, spoiled kid who didn't deserve any of it.

Riley sat back in his darkened home office and thought back to that first night, a night he tried not to think about at all. Everyone had been all abuzz about this kid, this superstar, who'd played his way up through the highest ranked Canadian boarding schools only to move back to the states to play for a small club team. He'd gone to the season opener against Marquette to see for himself what everyone was talking about and had not been disappointed by the kid's performance.

After the game, he followed the team to a nearby sports bar to try and get an interview with Cullen; hoping to be one of the first major news outlets to log a story on such a promising young talent. He knew that an interview with this kid could possibly put his career on the fast track and he wasn't leaving until he got what he wanted.

Of course he was only human and he would have been insane not to notice the pretty brunette hovering near the pool tables. She was scribbling frantically in her notebook and periodically asking questions to other players. She looked so young, and innocent and sweet. Perhaps she was a reporter herself, albeit a rather green one. Riley formulated a plan to approach her and offer her a few tricks of the trade, but that was when he saw an opening with Cullen.

Resolving to approach the girl after his interview, he closed in on where Cullen stood with one of his teammates.

"Edward, Hi. I'm Riley from ESPN. Do you mind if I ask you a few questions about tonight's game?" Riley gave Cullen a friendly smile and extended his hand to the young star, but he was in his own world. Riley followed Cullen's eye line until he saw what had captured his attention only to find that he was staring longingly at the same pretty, bespectacled brunette that Riley himself had been admiring just moments before.

"Edward?" Riley tried again. "I'd really like to do a feature on you if you wouldn't mind—"

"Talk to him," Cullen said, pushing his teammate toward Riley and making a move toward the lovely girl.

Over the course of the rest of the evening, Riley watched as Cullen and the reporter chit chatted, laughed and casually flirted. He also watched his chances of getting the girl and getting the story grow smaller and smaller by the second until vanishing completely when the two of them left the bar together.

Bitter taste left in Riley's mouth, indeed.

Of course it all made sense now and why it hadn't been clear to him sooner he'd never know. Then again it _did_ take him almost a year of working with Bella to realize that she and the pretty brunette reporter at the bar were one in the same. She had never mentioned any sort of relationship with Cullen so Riley had taken small solace in knowing that Cullen hadn't ended up with the girl in the long run.

It was fate, Bella coming to work for the network. It had to have been. It simply couldn't be some silly "small world" coincidence that this beautiful woman could enter into his life more than once. He'd kicked himself the first time for letting her slip through his fingers that night and was determined not to let it happen again, only to find that he'd been thwarted by Cullen yet again! It was too much to handle.

He tried to think it through logically. In the years that she and Riley had worked together, she had never mentioned once mentioned Cullen; not so much as even a reference to coming across him in their time at school together, which lead him to believe that nothing had really happened between them (an ideal situation) or Cullen had broken her heart. Until out of nowhere at the bar earlier that week in conversation, suddenly the two of them were "friends?"

How was that possible?

What had changed?

Riley racked his brain trying to piece a timeline together.

_Think, think, think!_

And then a revelation hit him like a ton of bricks, causing him to let out a roar that shook the windows of the old house even harder than the howling wind outside.

.~.~.~.~.~.

Bella breezed into the office Thursday morning feeling on top of the world. She hadn't felt this happy in recent memory and she wasn't going to let the worst winter in a century, or the lingering air of weirdness around the office, or her impending deadlines put a damper on how amazing she felt. She'd even stopped by a local bakery and picked up a dozen doughnuts for the office because she wanted to share her good mood with everyone else.

Jessica noticed the moment Bella exited the elevator and made a comment about how she looked "refreshed."

Mike thanked Bella for the doughnuts and complimented whatever it was that had made her feel the need to go out of her way to be so generous.

Riley gave her a wide grin and thanked her as well, but the smile didn't quite reach his eyes leading Bella to think that something wasn't quite as it should be.

She simply chalked it up to his still wounded ego and chose not to make it a bigger deal than it needed to be.

"Mike, do you mind if I speak with you for a minute?" Bella asked brightly after everyone was basking in the glow of sugar and coffee.

"Sure, Bella. What's up?" Mike replied jovially, as he lead Bella into his office.

"I was wondering if I might take a few personal days next week? I've been noticing that things have been slipping through the cracks a little bit lately and I think my head just isn't here right now. I think a few days to just get away and clear my head would do me a world of good," she explained.

"Really? I haven't noticed any of your work slipping. In fact, I was going to compliment you on the great job you've been doing around here lately. But if you think you need a break, I can definitely understand the toll working so hard can take on you sometimes. When did you want to take off?"

"I was hoping to take a long weekend. Maybe take off Friday and Monday, if that's alright with you. I'd be happy to turn all of my assignments in early so you guys will have them before broadcast and I can start on some new stuff as well if you need me to."

"Bella, honestly, you're the best writer I've ever worked with and you never take vacation days. Do whatever you need to do and don't worry about things here. Riley and I can hold things down for a few days."

"Oh I don't know about that, Mike," Riley said from the doorway. "Sorry you two, I hate to interrupt but my ears were burning. What's going on?" he asked; that same plastic smile making another appearance on his face.

"Oh…umm… I was just taking a few days off, that's all."

"Are you sure that's a good idea right now, Bella? We're getting ready for college football bowl season and we're going to need a ton of material to fill the on-air hours." His voice took on a sort of fatherly, sing-song quality that made Bella's skin crawl and a feeling of unease wash over her.

"Riley, I'm sure we can manage without Bella for two days. She deserves a break, don't you think?" Mike said, still smiling and completely unaware that anything was amiss.

"Sure, of course we can. No worries. At all." And with that Bella took the opportunity to excuse herself from the stifling office.

"Close the door, Ri," Mike said once Bella had gone. "What's going on with you lately? Everything okay? You seem a little on edge."

"Me? Of course. Everything's fine. I'm just not sure that Bella taking time off right now is such a good idea. This is one of our busiest times of the year and there are bound to be a ton of storylines coming out as football season winds down. We're going to need all the help we can get to keep up with everything."

"It's just two days, man. I think we'll be able to manage. But if you're really worried about it she said she'd start some new material early if we needed her two. So throw her a couple of stories that she can work on now if you think we'll absolutely need them."

"Yeah, I think it's necessary. I'll drum up a few leads for her to get started on right away."

Riley turned on his heel and excused himself from Mike's office, careful to hide the satisfied grin that spread across his face as he did so.

* * *

><p>So what do you think is going to happen from here?<p>

Please review, I'll love you forever!


	8. Jumping to Conclusions

Hi everyone! a quick note, I will be donating an outtake for The Fandom for Texas Wildfire Relief. The outtake will take place between the actions described in the original one-shot and the beginning of this one. It's mostly done and pretty good, if I do say so myself :) So if you want a little peek into what our couple were doing during their time apart, or you just want to donate to a very, very worthy cause, make a donation. You will not only get this outtake, but outtakes and original work from tons of other awesome authors! You can get more info on how to make a donation or how to sign up to be a contributing author at texasfires [dot] ysar [dot] info

**I do not own Twilight but hot hockey players are all mine. ALL OF THEM =)**

**Playlist: Down Boy by Yeah Yeah Yeahs**

* * *

><p>It had been a hellish weekend, jam packed full of research, fact checking, phone interviews, and writing. Not that Bella minded the work, in fact she was happier being busy than not, but this was getting out of hand.<p>

After returning from lunch Friday afternoon, Bella had been greeted by a stack of paperwork on her desk nearly six inches thick.

"Jessica?" she asked through the intercom.

"Yes, Bella?" the receptionist replied in her usual cheerful tone.

"Would you mind coming in here, please?"

"Sure, I'll be right there."

Bella eyed the stack of papers suspiciously as she paced around her desk, her eyebrow cocked and arms crossed over her chest, fearful that if she so much as even touched the stack that she'd be stuck with it.

"What's up?" Jessica asked brightly, bouncing into Bella's office.

"What's all this?" she asked, gesturing to the offending stack of papers neatly arranged on her desk.

"Mr. St. James had me compile it for you. I thought you had requested it?" Jessica looked thoroughly confused. "Pardon me for being intrusive, but is there something going on between you two? I don't mean to imply anything, it's just… something seems… _different_ around here."

"No, Jessica, I can say with one hundred percent certainty that there is nothing going on between Riley and me. Perhaps I should be asking you the same question," Bella countered with a sly smile.

"Me? And Mr. St. James? Oh no no," she replied hastily.

"No, Jessica. I meant between you and Mike."

Jessica's face flamed crimson and she slid the office door closed behind her, looking around nervously.

"Can I speak openly with you, Bella?" she asked in a half whisper, seemingly fearful that someone might overhear.

"Sure, of course you can."

"Okay… Mr. Newton… well, _Mike, _and I have sort of been seeing each other lately. Nothing's happened, just drinks after work a few times but I _really _like him. What do you think? Is it a bad idea to get involved with someone you work with?"

"Yes," Bella responded immediately only to watch Jessica's face fall. "Well… I guess it depends on the situation. There are ways of making it work, I'm sure. Can I speak openly with _you_, Jessica?"

"Absolutely."

"I can trust you to keep this conversation between us?"

"Definitely."

"Alright then. As a general rule of thumb, I'd say yes, getting involved with someone you work with is a bad idea but Mike is a good guy. I've spent some time with him outside of the office and he really is a good, genuine person. The same can't be said about some of the _other _men in this office apparently." Bella eyed the papers with disgust again.

"Riley?"

"Who else? What exactly did he tell you when he asked you to get all of this stuff together for me?"

Jessica thought hard for a moment. "Not much really; not to me anyway. But I sort of heard him in his office earlier mumbling something about wanting to fill up someone's time, and he sounded kind of happy about it. Do you think…do you think he meant _you_?" she asked, her eyes wide in astonishment.

Bella sighed and sank down onto the edge of her desk.

"Unfortunately, yes I think he did. I'm not really one to assume the worst about people but it makes sense, doesn't it?"

Jessica cocked an eyebrow, "I'm sorry, I don't think I follow."

"The flowers yesterday, remember? The roses were from Riley but the orchids… they were from someone else. And now he's jealous because I told him that I thought it was inappropriate for the two of us to date."

"Does this have anything to do with why he asked me to give him a copy of your personal calendar for next week?"

Bella's eyes went wide and nearly bulged out of her head.

"When did he ask you for that?" she asked trying to keep her voice even and controlled but failing miserably.

"Last night, right after you left for the evening. I knew that you had asked Mike for some time off, so I just assumed that it was just to cross reference the dates and make sure that there weren't any conflicts."

Bella felt her stomach constrict into knots and a feeling of cold sweat broke out across her body.

"What was on there, Jessica? What did you see?" Bella already knew the answer to her question, but hoped against hope that she was wrong.

"Your calendar had details on your flight to Pittsburgh next Thursday evening. I'm sorry, should I not have given it to him?" Jessica asked innocently.

"No, no, it's not your fault. Its public information, it's just odd that he'd ask for it now when he's never paid any attention to my schedule before."

"Bella, I don't know the full extent of what's going on between you two but I consider you my friend, so if I hear anything strange, I'll tell you."

"I don't want to involve you in this thing, Jessica."

"You're not. I know a lot of people think I'm just a dumb air-head but I pay a lot closer attention around here than people think."

Bella smiled warmly at the effervescent secretary.

"I would really appreciate if you wouldn't mind just keeping your ears open. That's all."

Jessica smiled back, happy to feel like she was performing a bigger service than just filing and fetching coffee.

Bella had always been a hard worker, and now would be no different. If Riley wanted to try and throw a roadblock in front of her, she knew that the only thing she could do was to tackle it head on. She would take the work without complaint in spite of his petty act of revenge and do it well.

She worked all weekend, tirelessly going over every detail to ensure that no fault could be found with her work. She felt bad because she didn't have much time to dedicate to Edward, especially since he was traveling to Tampa and Nashville for away games and had limited time himself. But she watched the games as closely as she could, given her preoccupation, and sent him texts of congratulations when the team extended their winning streak to eleven.

.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

Bella had been busy all weekend and had had very little time to spend with Edward on the phone. This long distance thing was proving to be slightly more difficult and frustrating than he had originally thought. Although, she had assured him that her current workload was not the norm. Bella hadn't wanted to assume the worst, but Edward had a sneaking suspicion that the guy from her office was purposely making things difficult for her ever since she declined his advances.

"No, no, I'm sure I was just jumping to conclusions. This is a busy time of year for us; everyone is having to pick up a little extra slack," she'd said during one of their brief conversations but Edward wasn't convinced. He knew that Bella was no stranger to hard work—in fact, she relished in it, she thrived on it, but it all seemed far too coincidental for her workload to increase exponentially right around the time when a personal conflict had arisen.

It made him sick with anger thinking about the possibility of this man using his power over Bella, who was technically his subordinate, with the express purpose of making her life harder. It wasn't right, and if there was anything he could do to make it stop, he would. However, this was not his battle to fight, no matter how much he wanted to.

Luckily for him, he'd had two long trips to keep him occupied. The team had departed Thursday evening from Pittsburgh bound for Tampa. The Penguins and the Lightning were Eastern Conference rivals and always played a good game. Their team was always adapting to whatever team they were facing, pushing harder, and striving for excellence. They were definitely not a team to be taken lightly.

Edward and the team arrived in Tampa late Thursday night. Though it had been breathtakingly cold in Pittsburgh when they'd left, it was a comfortable 68 degrees at the Tampa airport when they landed. The air smelled cleaner there than what he was used to, with a slight hint of saltiness that made his lungs expand to a wonderfully newfound capacity. It was one of the many perks of his job; traveling the world and experiencing what different cities had to offer and this was one of his favorites.

As the team drove from the airport to the hotel, he heard many of his teammates kicking around the idea of wanting to get away after the morning's skate to cruise one of the beaches. Edward just shook his head and laughed at the fact that his Canadian and Eastern European teammates had no idea that this type of weather was frigid to Floridians and that the beaches would be practically deserted. Still, he let his mind wander to the girl so very far away and what it would be like to come here with her. He could imagine her digging her toes into the powder fine sand and scrunching her nose up and giggling at the sensation. He could imagine her lying on a towel under the sun, her smooth, creamy skin, warming and glowing under the sunlight.

He sighed and smiled wistfully out of the charter bus window.

"Cullsy, what's got you smiling like a little bitch, huh?" Mac asked, smacking him hard on the arm from across the aisle, jarring him from his peaceful thoughts.

"Nothin' man," he replied, almost annoyed.

"Aww hell. You're daydreaming about your chick again, aren't you? Snap out of it, bro. We've got no time for women this weekend." Emmett slide over the empty space between them and slung an arm around Edward's shoulders, shaking him playfully. Edward cast a disbelieving look at his teammate. "Yeah well, not any women that would take your head out of the game, anyway. And you know as well as I do that not all women do that. Some give you _exactly_ what you need to stay focused," he said, leering.

Edward's closest friend on the team had always been Emmett, mostly because Emmett was everything that Edward wasn't. He was brash and outspoken, while Edward was more self reserved and contemplative. That's not to say, of course, that Edward was one to hold himself back if the situation called for action, but he usually wasn't one to act without thinking. This mirror image behavior carried over into their interactions with women.

Emmett had a little black book, so to speak, that could put anyone else's to shame. He had women in all 30 cities across the US and Canada where the team played and was always happy to add more. He never saw himself settling down and was happy to be a confirmed bachelor for the rest of his life.

"Women are more trouble than they're worth," he'd say. "They have their redeeming qualities, of course, but on the whole I'd rather grow old alone, watching sports on the couch than antiquing with some broad I lost interest in long before."

His lifestyle suited him just fine, and no one tried to convince him otherwise.

The team piled off of the bus and into the upscale hotel as the players paired off with their usual roommates. They all bid each other goodnight and retired to their suites for the night.

Once Edward and Emmett were away from the rest of the team, and unwinding with some television, Emmett grew quiet; something very out of character for him.

"Hey Cullen?" he began, without his usual bravado.

"What's up, man?"

"This is going to sound… I don't know, really fucking stupid, but do you think that I'm…well, that I'm sort of a…"

"No offense Mac, but spit it out; I'm beat."

"Alright fine. Do you think that I'm a lost cause?"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"With women. Do you think I've fucked around too much?"

Edward flopped onto his bed with a sigh and began studying the swirls in the paint on the ceiling intently.

"I don't know, dude. I guess not. I mean, I wouldn't exactly go around bragging about your conquests to other women, but girls love a project. You know, somebody they can fix."

Emmett laughed mirthlessly. "Yeah, somebody's pet project; that'd be me."

"Are you having second thoughts about 'living the dream' or something?" Edward asked.

"I don't know, maybe. Sometimes I think about it and I don't want the hassle and the drama of it all. But I hear you talking about your chick and, I'm just gonna throw this out there; she's kind of every guy's dream. I sort of start to think, 'Regular girls; nah, not for me.' But a girl like yours… yeah, I could be down for something like that. But don't worry, Bella is off limits," he added with a grin.

Edward chuckled good naturedly, "Yeah, she'd better be. But I know what you mean. I guess things with Bella and me are a little different because of our circumstances, but do you think that if she wasn't something special that I'd have held out for her for so long?"

"Yeah, I know, dude, but regular girls are a dime a dozen. How do I even go about finding a chick like that? A chick that gets me, you know; a girl that understands _this_ life with all the travel and the constant training and the injuries? It's not like I can exactly place a personals ad for that shit."

"Well, I can tell you that the girl you sound like you're looking for wouldn't be caught dead in some puck bunny groupie pool, that's for sure. You want to be done with all the petty drama and find yourself a _real _woman? Then go where _real _women are."

"And where's that? Do you know how long it's been since I've actually _dated _a girl?" Emmett asked, tossing a tennis ball up and bouncing it off of the ceiling.

"Maybe you shouldn't try to necessarily date right away."

"What the hell would I do then?" Emmett looked at Edward across the room like he'd grown a second head.

"Are you really that clueless?" Edward asked, shaking his head. "First of all, stop sleeping with anything and everything that has a pussy and a pulse; start there. Then find a girl that you like, and I mean actually have something in common with or that interests you more than just for what's under her skirt. Then, and this may come as a bit of a shock for you, why don't you try being _friends _with her."

"What does a guy do with a girl that he's just friends with?"

"Well anything naked is out, that's for sure. You'd do common interest things, like… I don't know, hanging out in groups, watching movies. How about this, if you'd do it with me, then you can do it with a girl _friend."_

Edward could see the gears in Emmett's head turning, before he shuddered animatedly.

"I'll keep that in mind if things ever start to get hot and heavy; picture the girl with your face and my dick will go running for the hills," he laughed boisterously.

"Fuck you, whatever works," Edward laughed and clicked off the light for the night.

.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

Riley stared down at the typed itinerary on his desk and studied it with malicious scrutiny; as if the words on the page themselves had done something to offend him.

In all honesty, his mind had already been made up. He _knew_ that Cullen was the one Bella had been seeing but he needed more solid proof than just a flight reservation.

_There could be a million reasons why someone would want to go to Pittsburgh, _he tried to rationalize to himself, but his angry side that had been dormant for years spat venom onto his rationalizations, twisting and burning them until all reasonable thought was gone.

No, a simple flight reservation was not enough to satisfy his morbid curiosity; he needed something more. He waited until everyone else had left for the evening before creeping out of his office to take a look around. Most of the lights had been switched off which caused strange and eerie shadows to play along the windows and walls as the wind howled beyond them.

As he held the doorknob to Bella's office in his hand, the tiny, clear thinking part of him protested feebly but was quickly silenced.

The office was completely dark, save for the artificial glow of her computer monitor. Riley glanced around curiously, hopeful that she'd be stupid enough to leave evidence of her affair in plain sight, but found nothing of the sort.

He sat in her chair and scanned her desk surface until he spotted the orchids on the corner, the petals drooping and slightly wilted, with the accompanying note lying innocently against the vase. Riley sneered and pulled open her drawers one after another, searching.

He rifled through rough drafts of old articles, interview transcripts, archived photos, and found nothing out of the ordinary. That is until he came across her short blurb about the Penguins – Blackhawks game from just a short time prior.

As much as he hated to admit it right then, Bella had always done fantastic work and this article had been the only one in her time at the network that had appeared lackluster. He read the short paragraphs over and over again hoping for some sort of clue; every time coming up empty.

He sat back in her chair and raked his hands exasperatedly over his hair and face.

"What are you doing?" he said aloud to himself. "This is ridiculous."

Exhausted, and feeling increasingly ashamed of his childish behavior, Riley stood up and made his way toward the office door to leave. He stopped however when he saw the folded Blackhawks jersey resting innocently on one of her shelves. He picked it up and let the mesh material unfurl, revealing the mass of signatures across the surface. Seeing it sparked something in Riley's memory and he thought back to the evening at the bar with Bella, Mike, and Jessica.

When asked about why she hadn't interviewed Cullen at the game Bella had said that he'd already left by the time she got there but Mike had heard that no one had seen him leave.

Interest sparked, Riley rushed back to his office to call a contact at the charter bus company the United Center used to ferry visitor teams back and forth from the venue, airport and hotel. Sure enough, his contact confirmed that Cullen had not been on the bus with the rest of the team when it left for the airport.

He then tried a contact at O'Hare airport. His contact informed him that on the night in question, the Penguins private plane bound for Pittsburgh had been delayed for unknown reasons. However, staff had confirmed seeing Edward Cullen, looking rather disheveled, waved through security long after the rest of the team had come through.

After hanging up the phone, he thought very hard about his next move. He knew what he wanted to do, but he also knew that it could be seen as a gross misuse of power. He had all but talked himself out of it when his need to know got the better of him.

Dialing the phone to yet another contact, he spoke slowly and clearly to the man on the other end of the line.

"Hey, It's Riley St. James. I need for you to get me the security tapes from the United Center on the night of the Pittsburgh game. Specifically the cameras near the visitor locker room."

* * *

><p>As always, please review and let me know what you think. I was also considering starting a blog to post reference material, photos, playlists, etc. Would anyone find that helpful?<p> 


	9. The Newest Girlfriends

Holy crap! I know it has been like, 8 years since I last updated this thing but I have had writer's block something fierce. Any guesses as to what finally gave me inspiration? Anyone? It was the return of my favorite player/inspiration for this Hockeyward back to the ice after 10 months away! Oh what a glorious day it was! Ok I'll stop. Anyway, moving right along... here's another chapter. Enjoy!

* * *

><p>The fasten seatbelts sign went off and nearly all of the passengers on the plane began to stir simultaneously. Bella fidgeted with the buckle before releasing herself from the confines of her seat and standing to rummage in the overhead compartment. She retrieved her phone from her carry-on bag and powered it on.<p>

She'd given Edward her flight information but the particulars of how she was going to get to him were yet to be determined at her time of takeoff. He knew her reservations about coming out publically with their relationship and had left the decision up to her.

"Look babe," he'd said. "If you want me to meet you at the gate with an armful of roses and a mariachi band, I will. But if you want me to just wait in the car, that's fine too. You just say the word. All I want is to see you; how you get to me doesn't matter."

Bella smiled at the memory of his sweet words as she checked her messages quickly before disembarking the plane.

A text from Edward from just a few minutes earlier simply read: _I'm here. Should I park or swing through the pick-up lane?_

The long dormant, but suddenly uncharacteristically active, hopeless romantic side of her wanted to tell him to park and meet her at the gate so that she could throw herself into his arms the moment she laid eyes on him. But she sighed as she realized that doing so would completely undermine the covert status of their relationship. And of course, by the time he parked, got inside, and made his way to her gate, it would have taken more time than if she just went to where she knew he would be. _Practicality wins again. _

_I'm going to grab my bag and meet you outside. See you soon! _She typed back hastily, the excitement of seeing Edward again beginning to make her hands tremble.

With a barely audible, elated squeak, she tucked her phone into her carryon bag and strode quickly through the bustling crowd of passengers to baggage claim. Once there, she tapped the toe of her tall leather boot against the sealed floor, growing increasingly impatient with every passing moment.

A young boy, no older than five or six, came streaking by where Bella stood in a blur of black and gold.

"Daddy!" the boy exclaimed as he threw himself into the arms of a travel worn businessman in a wrinkled suit that she recognized from her flight. The man hoisted the little boy up with his one free arm and tossed him over his shoulder, much to the boy's squealing delight. Bella smiled at the loving display in front of her. Her smile grew exponentially when she realized that the black and gold shirt the child was wearing was emblazoned with the name "Cullen" across the back, from shoulder to shoulder.

"Hey buddy!" the father greeted, happily. "Dressing for the game a little early aren't you?"

"He's just excited that his dad is home in time to take him to his first hockey game tomorrow night," a woman with short blonde hair, obviously the boy's mother, said with a smile as she placed a loving kiss on her husband's smiling mouth.

"Yeah, dad. I can't wait to see Cullen, and McCarty, and Whitlock, and Boucher, and LaFleur, and…" the boy's voice faded into the din of the crowd as the family made their way toward the parking area.

Suddenly the baggage carousel began to turn and Bella's attention shifted to finding her bag in the sea of black luggage. Luckily, hers was the first down the chute and she grabbed it quickly before heading outside.

_What kind of car should I be looking for? _she texted Edward, a little embarrassed that she didn't already know the answer to that question.

_-Look up._

Bella's head snapped up and directly in front of her, pulled up to the curbside was a silver Range Rover piloted by none other than her handsome hockey star himself.

He quickly jumped from the car and ran around the car to help her with her bag. Before she even had a chance to protest, not that she was even sure she would have, Edward wrapped a strong arm around her waist and pulled her into a quick but smoldering kiss that left her body craving more. All too soon, he pulled away with a mischievous grin and loaded her luggage into the back of the SUV.

"Well hey there, gorgeous," he said cheerfully once they were both settled into the front seats of the vehicle.

"Hi yourself," she grinned back.

"Sorry for that little PDA back there. You know I can't keep my hands, or my lips, off of you." His smile widened as he entwined his fingers with hers and brought the back of her hand up to his mouth. "Forgive me?"

"I guess," she said with a smirk as they pulled away from the airport and set off through the darkening night toward the rising Pittsburgh skyline on the horizon.

.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

Bella awoke early the next morning feeling happier and lighter than she had in weeks. All of her cares were safely back in Chicago and all that mattered right then was lying next to her, snoring peacefully. She had promised herself that she wouldn't think about Riley or the situation looming back at the office, but she couldn't help herself from noticing just how quickly things had changed, and just as quickly taken a turn for the worse. She wondered what kind of storm she'd walk into when she went back to work on Tuesday and had already made up her mind that she would reach out to Jessica for a possible heads up of what to expect.

Edward stirred in his sleep and slung a heavy arm across her midsection. Bella smiled as she began using her finger tips to trace the contours of his finely sculpted bicep and shoulder. He really was quite an incredible specimen to see, let alone touch and feel, and she was still in a certain state of disbelief that he actually belonged to her at all.

She turned under the weight of his arm, nuzzled her face into the crook of his neck and breathed deeply to take in his strong, masculine scent. All of her troubling thoughts about Riley and her work drama were forgotten as she thought back to the previous night and how it felt to be reunited with Edward again.

He'd been very playful and flirtatious during the drive to his condo but that had all changed as soon as they'd gotten inside. The air around them crackled with electricity as a dark cloud seemed to fall over his features in the dim light that just barely illuminated their surroundings. He was no longer light and jovial, but greedy and determined. He'd placed her luggage at the base of the stairs before taking her into his arms and kissing her more deeply and more passionately than any man ever had in her entire life.

"I missed you," he murmured against her lips. But before she had an opportunity to return his sentiment, he was kissing her again; forcefully, authoritatively, yet tenderly all at the same time.

Bella's head was swimming with the overwhelming sensations he was stirring within her and the element of being in a new and unfamiliar place. They stumbled clumsily down the entrance hall and through the darkness, all the while never breaking contact with each other for more than the briefest of moments, all the while shedding articles of clothing as they went.

She followed his lead blindly, trusting that he wouldn't allow her to injure herself in the dark. If she was really being honest with herself, the way he was making her feel made it hard to even tell up from down let alone how to navigate through a dark, strange house. Suddenly she felt something solid yet soft against the back of her legs and she collapsed onto a plush, leather sofa. The cool material was a sharp contrast to her already over heated skin and the sensation of the two coming together made her shiver.

Her breath came in short, labored pants as she looked up at the dark silhouetted form of Edward's frame standing over her. She couldn't see his face but she could definitely feel his eyes as they raked over her mostly naked body, clothes long forgotten in a tail leading back to the door.

Slowly, and in an almost predatory fashion, he lowered himself down on top of her and expertly rid her, as well as him, of all remaining barriers as he went.

And then his mouth was on her again, this time he was everywhere, kissing, tasting and exploring every exposed inch of her.

"Edward," she breathed desperately, when she felt so wound up that she might tear in half.

"There I go not being able to keep my mouth to myself again," he whispered huskily, with a distinctive smirk in his voice.

With a swift and powerful movement, he pushed her legs apart, and wrapped them around his waist as he situated himself between them.

What happened next was an indescribable blur of pleasure and all-encompassing desire. All time apart and distance between them lay forgotten as they reacquainted themselves with each other's bodies.

After what felt like both hours and mere minutes, the two of them melted together in slick, breathless mass on the couch. Edward held her close and basked in the incredible feeling of simply having his woman there, with him, in his home, for the first time.

He was never one to compare his "conquests" but as they lay there silently together, his mind wandered to a few of the women whose company he'd enjoyed in the past. He'd even had a few right there on that very couch, but this time it was different. He couldn't quite place his finger on what it was that set this experience apart from all the others, but whatever it was, he liked it and never wanted it to end.

As they came down from their high, Bella began to shiver.

"Are you cold, baby?" he asked softly, to which she nodded into his chest. Which a slight chuckle, he gently slid her petite body off of his and walked through the darkness across the room. There was a soft pop and suddenly the room was bathed in the warm orange glow of a gas fireplace.

Bella was speechless as she watched him walk back across the room, completely nude and with a quiet confidence and swagger that took her breath away. Backlit by the fire he looked even more mythical that he normally did; a body of stone and a face equally as chiseled.

"Damn," he said, stopping mid stride just a few feet away from her.

"What?" she asked.

"You."

"Me? What about me?" she asked with a cocked eyebrow.

He flashed her one of his patented sexy smirks before rejoining her back on the sofa with her back pressed against his chest.

"You're so beautiful," he whispered against the shell of her ear making her shiver again for entirely different reasons.

Bella fell asleep to periodic kisses to her hair and Edward's large, strong hands sliding lazily up and down her arms.

She didn't remember getting up to go into the bedroom which lead her to believe that Edward had carried her there as she slept; another thought that made her smile. And as she lay there partially pinned beneath his heavy arm, she fell back to sleep completely content and never wanting to leave the safe, warm cocoon of his bed.

.~.~.~.~.~.~.

At 8:15 on the dot, as per his usual routine, Edward awoke to find that he hadn't imagined Bella coming to visit. Her soft, naked body was curled into his side and he felt like he was on top of the world.

As much as he would have loved to just stay in bed with her all day, he had practice to get to. Not wanting to wake her, he dressed quickly and quietly before leaving a quick note on the kitchen counter downstairs and heading out the door.

It was a rare sunny morning in December and Edward couldn't fight the smile that had taken up residence on his face. As he drove, he drummed his fingers happily along the steering wheel and sang loudly and horribly out of tune to every song that came on the radio, whether he knew the words or not.

With a bounce in his step that was a bit out of character for him, he strode through the parking lot of CONSOL Energy Center*, and into the locker room to get ready for that morning's skate.

"So?" Emmett asked, flopping down onto the bench beside him as he laced up his skates.

"So what?"

"Nope, you don't even have to answer. That shit-eating grin says it all," he laughed, slapping Edward on the back. "I'm glad your chick made in safely. Maybe now you can relax a little."

Edward felt his cheeks get warm as he laughed uncomfortably.

"Yeah, she's here. Is it that obvious?"

"Cullsy, this may be the most chick-ish thing I'll ever say in my life but, you're glowing, dude; lit up like a fucking Christmas tree. So yeah, it's that obvious."

His permanent smile grew even more than he ever thought it could and he tried to hide it as he pulled his dark grey practice jersey over his head and followed the rest of the team out onto the ice.

The next few hours were spent on shooting and puck handling drills and the usual team banter and jokes. Boucher had somehow managed to affix a sign to the back of LaFleur's jersey that read "Human Target," and all through practice the guys went out of their way to knock him down. Edward and the rest of the team could no longer contain their laughter when Lafleur had had enough and nearly exploded after a hard hit from the team's longest standing veteran and captain, Peter Sullivan.

"You've gotta keep a cooler head, kid," Sullivan laughed as he pulled the sign from LaFleur's back.

Garrett floundered for a moment before laughing alongside his new teammates. He was, after all, still the new kid on the block and they were only trying to have a little fun.

Coach Banner blew the whistle sharply, indicating the end of practice, and the team skated off toward the dressing room.

"Hey Cullsy, wait up a sec," Whitlock called from across the rink.

"What's up, Jazz?"

"Is your girl going to the game tonight?"

"Yeah, that's the plan. That reminds me; I need to check with the office to make sure they were able to get me a seat behind the glass."

"You're not putting her up in the box with the others?"

"Nah, she said she wanted to actually be a fan for once and be down by the action. When she puts it like that, how could I say no?" he said with a proud smile.

"Um… you think the office could get two tickets?"

"Two? Why?"

"Alice, you know, the girl I've been talking to. I sort of came clean about what I do and she wants to see it firsthand. I was hoping that maybe she and Bella could, I don't know, hang out or something. Being the newest girlfriends, and all."

"Yeah, I don't see why not. I'll head up there after I get dressed and make sure everything's cool. So, she's cool with you being a big, dumb jock?" Edward asked, playfully.

"Yeah, she was surprisingly cool with it. I told her and she didn't seem fazed by it at all, which was pretty cool. She doesn't really know much about sports, so umm… do you think Bella would mind giving her a little bit of an overview? I tried to explain the basics to her last night but she said she'd understand better when she could actually see it. I mean, I don't want Bella to have to babysit her or anything, I just thought that being new to the WAGs group and all, they could… bond, or whatever."

"I'm sure it'll be fine, Jazz. Don't worry about it. I didn't really like the idea of Bella sitting by herself anyway, so it works out."

* * *

><p>* <strong>CONSOL Energy Center<strong> is an arena in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. The arena is the second home of the Pittsburgh Penguins, the city's NHL franchise. Construction was completed on August 1, 2010,and opened in time for the 2010–11 NHL season. The arena replaced the Penguins' former arena, Mellon Arena also known as The Igloo.

* **Line, **also known as the forward line or attacking line, consists of two wings (left and right) and a center. These three players play nearer the opponent's goal and are typically the fastest players on the team and are responsible for the majority of the scoring.


	10. Snooping

I'm back! Now that the holidays are over I've had a bit more time to myself and my thoughts and this is the result. Everybody wins!

Last chapter I was ten kinds of excited because my hockey muse was back on the ice after a long absence. Now, unfortunately he's hurt again. :( Oh well, the show must go on.

Enjoy!

**I do not own Twlight, but hot hockey players are all mine. ALL OF THEM =)**

**Playlist: After Tonight by Justin Nozuka**

* * *

><p>Bella awoke again, much later this time, to an empty bed. She was slightly alarmed for a moment due to the fact that she was alone in an unfamiliar place, but she quickly remembered that Edward had practice that morning.<p>

Seizing the opportunity to do a bit of innocent snooping, she sat up and surveyed his bedroom. The walls were bare but 10 feet high or greater and lead into a steeply vaulted ceiling. The room was spacious but sparsely decorated with just a large, sturdy four poster bed, dresser, bedside table and modest entertainment center. Large, thickly curtained windows behind the bed overlooked a snow covered deck a floor below, the swiftly moving river, and the skyline of Pittsburgh backlit by a brilliantly blue sky.

Bella tentatively placed her feet on the cream colored carpet, before stopping short; she realized that unless Edward had brought her luggage upstairs before he left, everything she'd brought with her was on the ground level of his three story condo. Seeing her bag nowhere and not exactly being one to traipse around naked in her boyfriend's house without him there, she wrapped herself up in the sheet from the bed and padded over to his dresser to find something temporary to throw on.

His clothes were neatly folded and appeared to be rather organized. After deciding on a well-worn t-shirt emblazoned with the team logo and a pair of entirely oversized boxers that needed to be rolled up at the waistband several times before they even thought about fitting, she began to curiously wander the house.

The en suite was very masculine with black tiled floors, an all glass shower stall (for optimal viewing, she surmised), and black granite counter tops that blended seamlessly into a black garden tub that sat beneath an open window that overlooked the river. Bella allowed herself to indulge in the fantasy of watching him shower while she took a bubble bath and sipped a glass of wine. She could perfectly imagine his crooked smile and flawless body partially obstructed by the fogged glass as he soaped up all over. She bit her lip and blushed at the thought before switching off the bathroom light and moving on to explore further.

Down the hall from the master bedroom was what appeared to be an office of sorts, or perhaps a library. The desk toward the back of the room held a sophisticated looking computer and little else that she could see, but what really caught her attention were the countless books, neatly arranged on bookcases against the two outer walls. Titles she recognized and some she didn't, paper and hardback alike, populated the shelves and made her smile.

_Definitely not just a dumb, jock, _she thought to herself.

As she turned to exit the room, she saw that the wall behind her held more shelves, these filled with his various trophies. She thought it was funny that Edward had won nearly every major award than any hockey player could, and yet he had them stashed away in a room on the top floor of his home instead of on display in some flashy case for the entire world to see. But then again, that was just the type of person Edward was; or so she was coming to understand.

Hung on the wall next to his trophy case was a framed Northwestern jersey emblazoned with the number that had followed him up to the pros; Six. There was some superstitious, cosmic alignment story behind that number and why he insisted on keeping it, but she couldn't remember the details.

Bella smiled again at the purple and white material behind the glass. It was strange to think that the first night he donned that jersey was the same night that forever linked them together.

Further down the hall were two more bedrooms, one of which was immaculately decorated, had a distinctive woman's touch, and stood in stark contrast to the rest of the house that she'd seen so far. She'd have to remember to ask him why that was later.

Down a flight of stairs was an expansive great room, complete with several seating areas, a far less modest entertainment center than what was in his bedroom, and a breakfast nook. But what really caught her attention was the small but sleek kitchen. She made a mental note to come back and poke around there again shortly.

Down yet another flight of stairs and into the basement, Bella discovered what could only be called Edward's "Man Cave." There was a massive pool table in the middle of the room flanked on one side by exercise equipment and another expensive looking television and a leather sofa on the other. Covering the walls were countless pieces of sports memorabilia and pictures of, what must have been, friends and family. Though this was perhaps the most fun room in the house, the basement was cold and the tile floor felt like ice beneath her feet, so she quickly retreated back upstairs.

Once she was back in the kitchen, Bella noticed a small hand written note lying on the counter.

_Help yourself to whatever you like._

_I can't wait to get back home to you._

Bella's face went warm again as she bit her lower lip in a poor attempt at hiding a smile and slumped against the edge of the cool granite.

She was tempted to try and pinch herself because she thought that all of this was simply too good to be true. It didn't seem possible that a man like Edward and a life like this could be real.

To assuage her thoughts from dwelling on how unlikely it was that any part of the last few weeks was true, let alone last, she busied herself with setting a pot of coffee on to brew and finding herself something to eat.

After setting an English muffin on to toast, she decided that the house was far too quiet for her liking, so she went to retrieve her iPod from her luggage near the stairs.

.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

Everything was going exactly according to plan. Edward had two tickets in hand, one for Bella and one for Jasper's girl, situated behind the glass and directly across from the bench. He had been a little bit concerned that being able to spot her so easily during gameplay could possibly distract him, but he quickly banished the thought, determined not to let her presence become a factor.

A renewed burst of excitement coursed through him as he pulled his Range Rover into the icy driveway in front of his house. It was a strange feeling walking into his home knowing that someone else was there waiting for him; the same someone he'd been hoping would be waiting for him for a very long time.

"Bella?" he called out as he entered the house through the garage entrance into the basement.

No answer.

He stripped off his knit toque and heavy sweatshirt before taking the stairs from the basement to the main floor two at a time.

"Bella?" he called again, and again he received no answer.

He started to make his way toward the stairs leading to the third floor when something caught his eye; bent over the bar in his kitchen was the cutest, sexiest ass he'd ever laid eyes on, just barely peeking out from the bottom of a pair of his favorite boxer shorts. Bella's legs were bare and smooth and her red painted toes tapped the tiled floor to some unheard beat. Her hair hung around her shoulders in loose, messy waves and appeared that little attention had been paid to it yet that day. She wore one of his tshirts that was so large that the sleeves hung down past her elbows.

"Bella, what are you-?" he trailed off but still she offered no replies and just continued to bob and bounce with her back to him.

As he moved closer he could see that she was standing bent over the bar reading the newspaper and drinking a cup of coffee. A half-eaten English muffin sat cold and forgotten on a plate off to the side.

He was about to try to talk to her again when he noticed the tiny wires leading from the ipod on the counter up to her ears. He smirked as he took a moment to simply admire her.

The years has certainly been good to her; not that 26 was by any means old, but dressed the way she was, she barely looked a day over 18. A fleeting through crossed his mind that if she'd barely aged a day in the near decade since they'd first met, he could only imagine how incredible she'd look after another decade. His smirk spread into a full blown smile at the possibility of getting to see that for himself.

Ready to make his presence known, he reached his large hands out to encircle her tiny waist and pull her away from the bar.

Immediately, her body tensed and she turned to face him, fists flailing. She landed a few hard slaps to his chest before she realized who was holding her. Edward just laughed and wrapped his arms more tightly around her.

"Easy, tiger. You wouldn't want to hurt yourself now, would you?" he chuckled.

"Or you," she said as she glared back at him in mock annoyance. "You scared me."

"Aww… don't be like that, baby. You were very scary. Would be intruders beware, I've got a live one in here," he chuckled again before leaning down to gently kiss her neck.

"Keep doing that and I could forgive you for things you haven't even done yet," she sighed wistfully.

"I'll keep that in mind," he smiled against the smooth skin of her throat.

"How are you back so soon?" she asked breathlessly, trying to keep her composure despite the sensations he was creating in her body with just the simplest of touches.

"Skipped talking to the press," he replied. "I had something more important to get back to."

He continued to blaze a trail of slow, soft kisses from one side of her neck to the other and up to the shell of her ear.

"Have I told you how great you look in my clothes?" he whispered.

"Not yet, you haven't."

"Well you do. So fucking sexy."

He kissed his way across her jaw until he finally made it to her lips that were practically screaming for his attention. She moaned softly into his kiss as she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him just a bit closer.

Edward lifted her up and placed her tiny body up on the counter. She gasped as the icy granite came into contact with the sensitive skin on the backs of her legs.

"Don't worry," he said with a smile against her lips. "I'll warm you right up."

Without another moment's hesitation, Edward's large, hot hand slid its way under the oversized tshirt to palm one of her breasts. He felt another soft moan vibrate into his mouth and he took it as a sign that she liked what he was doing. He felt her nipple harden as he brushed over it with his thumb.

He wanted her. He _always_ wanted her, but with a game that evening, he knew that using up too much energy wasn't a good idea.

_That doesn't mean we can't have a little fun, _he thought to himself with another smirk as he let his hand trail down her abdomen before easily finding her soft, wet center through the leg of the much-too-large boxer shorts.

Bella's head fell backwards as she gasped in surprise.

"Edward…" she sighed, her eyes heavy lidded and her lip caught between her teeth.

"I love when you say my name like that," he practically growled as his fingers began to work her slick folds. His thumb gently massaged her clit as he slid first one and then another of his thick, dexterous fingers inside of her.

Through her pleasure, she leaned forward slightly and reached for the draw string of his sweatpants but he stopped her with a soft nip of his teeth to her earlobe.

"Ah ah, beautiful," he whispered. "No touching."

She whimpered softly as she slowly pulled her hands back and used them to support her weight as she leaned back slightly on the cool counter.

Edward brought his fingers, slick with her juices up to his lips and inhaled her heady scent before sliding them into his mouth to taste her. She bit down harder on her lip as she watched him enjoy her.

"So sweet," he sighed. "Would you like a taste?"

She glanced around the kitchen nervously before slowly nodding her head.

"Good girl," he replied in a low, thick voice as he brought his thumb to her mouth. Her lips slowly parted as she looked up at him with wide, innocent eyes. She wrapped her lips around the digits slowly, languidly, never taking her eyes off of his. Her tongue lapped at the salty, sweet liquid that coated his skin and she gently dragged her teeth across the pad of his thumb.

The little show she was putting on was driving him insane. He'd yet to feel her lips wrapped around another part of his body and watching her was beginning to make his imagination run wild. But now was not the time for that. He wanted her and he wanted her to know what he'd been fantasizing about all morning.

In movements so quick her eyes could barely register what was happening, he grabbed her hips with both hands and pulled her to the edge of the counter before pulling the boxers down her legs. He dropped to his knees, threw her legs over his shoulders, and began to devour every inch of her.

Bella's supporting arms almost buckled at the sudden sensations as she let out a cry that echoed off of the kitchen walls.

"Oh my god," she moaned and one of her hands made its way into his thick, unruly hair. She thought for a brief moment that she'd have to gently guide him to just the right spot but she was quickly proven wrong as his expert mouth found its way directly to the very place that drove her wild. When he added his two fingers back into the mix, it wasn't long before he had her calling out every expletive she could think of as her body dissolved into a quivering mass of satiated flesh on the ice cold countertop.

.~.~.~.~.~.~.

"Jasper told Alice to meet you here in about an hour. You're _sure_ you can get there okay?" Edward asked for what felt like the 100th time.

"_Yes. _This isn't my first time driving in Pittsburgh and it certainly isn't my first time going to Consol. Listen, I promise I'll take good care of your car. Don't worry; I've got it under control." Bella smiled up at him as he finished buttoning up his crisp white shirt.

"I know, I know. What do you think of this tie?" he asked, holding up a navy blue tie and comparing it to his reflection in the mirror.

"Very nice," she said with a giggle.

"What?"

"Nothing, you're just… adorable. You've asked my opinion of everything you've got on. It makes me wonder how you dress yourself when I'm not around."

"With great difficulty," he laughed back. "That just means you'll have to stick around."

Bella rolled her eyes as she took the tie from his hands and looped it around his neck.

"Come on, tell me you couldn't picture this being a regular thing," he said in a much more serious tone.

"Picture _what_ being a regular thing?" she asked evasively.

"This. You and me. This snap-shot of domesticity we've got going on here."

"Going down on me in the kitchen notwithstanding, of course," she answered back with a grin.

"Hey, that's part of my image of wedded bliss. Isn't it part of yours?" he laughed on.

"Oh, so we're getting married now?" she asked with a cocked eyebrow.

"Well someone's full of themselves, aren't they? Who said anything about marrying _you?_" he joked before reaching out and tickling her ribs. She collapsed into his arms in a fit of laughter that only came to a halt when she was gasping for breath.

The laughs slowly subsided and she rubbed her sides to ease the soreness of his tickle attack. With a dreamy sigh, she looked up at him and simply said, "yes."

"Yes what?"

"Yes, I could get used to this."

Her eyes sparkled as she looked up at him and he smiled larger than he ever knew he could. He bent down to kiss her but just before he could he was interrupted by the sound of a car horn from outside.

"That's Jasper," he said before quickly pecking her on the lips. "Meet me in the locker room after the game," he called as he ran for the door.

"This won't be like the last time I met you in a locker room, will it?" she called after him playfully.

* * *

><p>Aren't they just the cutest thing?<p>

A toque for those who don't know is a knit hat, sort of like what we Americans would call a beanie.

I'm going to try and get the next chapter out much faster than this one. Thanks to all of you who've stuck with me so far and thank you in advance for the reviews. I appreciate each and every one of them.


	11. Girl Date

We're seeing game play in the chapter, ladies and gentlemen, so if you're not a sports fan just muscle through it. As always all terminology will be explained at the end. Also, I'm in the process of updating my blog with photo references, videos, music, etc to go with each chapter. I hope you'll check it out. Wellmademistake [dot] blogspot [dot] com

**I do not own Twilight. But hot hockey players are all mine. ALL OF THEM =)**

**Musical inspiration (and only because I can't get the damn song out of my head): We Are Young by Fun. ft Janelle Monae**

* * *

><p>Bella put the finishing touches on her makeup before taking a step back and looking herself over in the mirror. It was a pleasant change to be dressed in normal "fan attire" for a game instead of her usual business garb. True to his word, Edward had brought home a "Cullen" jersey for her to wear; black with white and gold accents, and she loved the way it looked on her. She knew that there would be thousands of other people wearing a jersey with same name stitched on the back, but <em>hers<em> was special because it came from the man himself, and only _she_ knew that. The little inside joke brought a smile to her face as the doorbell chimed through the house.

Excitedly, she bounded down the stairs from Edward's bedroom to the front door a floor below. She wasn't entirely sure how she should feel about being thrown into a sort of "girl date" with one of Edward's teammate's girlfriends, but she figured it would probably be better than sitting alone; at least this way she wouldn't feel quite so out of place amidst the crowd of thousands.

She was greeted on the other side of the door by a smiling girl, just a bit younger than herself, with short dark hair cropped into a stylish bob. Her blunt cut bangs and thick, dark lashes stood in stark contrast to her bright blue eyes and alabaster skin and made her look a bit like a porcelain doll.

"Alice, right?" Bella asked with a smile.

"That's me," the girl replied back, grinning. "And you must be Bella. I've heard quite a bit about you."

"Oh really? I'm sorry, I wish I could say the same. Of course, I haven't really been around for long but—"

"Oh neither have I. Jasper and I are pretty new. But we talk. A lot. And he tells me about what's going on with all the guys. Apparently, Edward talks about you often."

Bella felt herself blushing.

"You'll have to fill me in on what you've heard on the way," she replied back with a smile before grabbing Edward's keys and joining her companion out on the stoop.

The two girls quickly made their way to Edward's Range Rover and cranked up the heat as Bella backed the SUV down the driveway.

"So," Bella began, "How did you and Whitlock meet?"

"I was stranded on the side of the road with a flat tire late one night and Jasper stopped to help me. It was the strangest thing; when I left the house that day I just had this weird feeling that _something_ was going to happen. The night before I'd had a dream about a blonde man. I couldn't really see his face, but after what happened I'm sure it was Jasper. I'm not really the type of person who puts a whole lot of stock in fate but sometimes things just line up a little _too perfectly_ for it not to be, you know?"

"Yeah, Jasper. Right. Sorry, in the sports world we refer to everyone by their last name. I forget that athletes even have first names sometimes."

"That's right, Jasper said that you're a sportswriter?"

"I am. I pretty much have my dream job. I love it."

"That's awesome. I pretty much have my dream job too. I don't know if anyone told you, but I'm sort of sports illiterate. When Jasper told me what he did for a living… honestly, I was a little freaked out. I mean, what in the world could we possibly have in common? Of course, it made sense, he's huge! And hot," she laughed. "So that helped until I got to know him better and found out that he's a really great guy too. So anyway, I hope you don't mind if I ask you a million questions. I grew up with sisters, so sports were never really on my radar."

"Yeah, of course. Ask away and I'll answer as best I can. What kind of work do you do?"

"I'm an event planner. I work for The Event Group here in the city. I have a team of people that I oversee and we basically get paid to throw expensive, lavish parties. What could be better than that?" Alice spoke a mile a minute, but she seemed genuinely friendly and her enthusiasm was infectious. Bella thought that maybe, just maybe, spending the evening with this girl wouldn't be so bad.

After a short drive through the darkened streets of Pittsburgh, Bella steered the car into the private parking lot reserved for players and guests. The two of them made their way through the cold and into the rear entrance of the arena.

Once their tickets were scanned and they were in line at the bar for drinks, Bella gave Alice a quick overview of the game. She explained how there was only supposed to be six players from each team on the ice at one time; three forwards, two defensemen, and the goaltender. She explained what each position's basic job was and where they were supposed to be on the ice. She explained general rules and penalties before Alice interrupted her.

"So… the fighting. What's that all about? Why do they do it?" she asked innocently as they made their way down to their seats.

"Well… it's sort of hard to explain. They fight of a couple of reasons; maybe somebody hits one of our guys into the boards really hard, or makes an illegal check*, then one of his teammates would go to his defense and rough up the guy who hit him. A lot of times, you'll see one of the guys on the losing team pick a fight just to get the rest of his team fired up. You'd be surprised how something like that can change the momentum of a game."

"Wow, that just seems so… barbaric," Alice said, wrinkling her nose.

"Yeah, it is. But I think of it this way; you've got a team of 23 guys— big, strong, muscley guys – and they're pumped up and their testosterone is through the roof. Aggression is bound to get the better of them from time to time so we might as well sit back and enjoy the show, right?"

"I guess you're right. I mean… it _is_ really hot, isn't it?" Alice giggled into her drink.

"You're damn right, it is," Bella agreed, tapping her beer to side of Alice's as they both laughed.

"When Jasper told me who he was, I looked him up online and one of the first things I found was a video of him and some guy just going at it. I'd always thought that guys who fought like that were such assholes, but Jasper's not like that at all. I guess you can't judge a book by its cover."

"The truth is, most of the guys who fight are the biggest softies you'll ever meet; just big teddy bears."

"Good to know."

The two of them continued to chat as the rest of the crowd filtered in. About 20 minutes before the game was scheduled to begin, the teams came streaming from the ramps behind the benches and onto the ice to warm up. Kids raced down to the lowest level behind the glass to get a glimpse of their heroes as they skated by. The team skated a few laps around their end of the ice before dropping to their knees and beginning to stretch.

"Oh my god," Alice said in a thick voice. "That's umm… one of the sexiest things I've ever seen," she continued, as she watched Jasper, just a few feet to their left, position himself on all fours on the ice, spread his knees apart and thrust himself downward to stretch his groin.

Bella giggled at her new friend until an errant puck hit the glass near her face with a sound similar to a gun shot. The kids nearby went berserk; banging on the glass, shouting for more. She would have been frightened if she hadn't immediately seen Edward about 20 feet away, holding his stick and smiling his trademark crooked grin.

Bella rolled her eyes at him, before he had a good laugh and dropped down to the ice in the same position Jasper had been.

"Umm yeah… you're right, Alice. That's really fucking hot," Bella giggled, biting her lip.

The players eventually lined up and took turns running through shooting drills; one player shooting the puck at the wall, another recovering the rebound and shooting it at the net. The motions were rapid fire and from her vantage point it was difficult to follow exactly what was going on.

_I can definitely see why the press sit so high up, _she thought to herself.

Bella looked around the rink, reading the signs pressed against the glass by the on-lookers. One just to one side of the home bench caught her eye and read, "Put it in my five-hole*, Cullen!". The two bimbo-looking blondes holding the sign screamed, and cheered and _jiggled, _every time Edward skated nearby. Bella's temper irrationally flared, ever so slightly. She knew women the world over were pining over Edward and jealousy was a stupid, wasted emotion – especially over something she had no control over. Underneath it all, she knew that she should feel lucky to have what so many others wanted. But still, the two bombshells opposite her made her blood boil.

The horn sounded a deafening blast and the home team lined up to take a few more quick laps around their end to wave to the fans. Edward caught Bella's eye and winked before he quickly flipped a puck up and over the glass toward her.

Laughing, Bella examined the dense rubber in her hand when she heard a small voice behind her.

"I want one of those. Daddy, is he going to come back around?"

"I don't know, buddy. They really don't have enough of those for everybody, but that's okay. We're going to have an awesome night and the penguins are going to win tonight, right champ?"

Bella glanced over her shoulder to see the little blonde boy and his businessman father (looking noticeably more rested) from the airport. The boy looked a little disappointed but his dad was doing everything he could to cheer him up.

"Excuse me," Bella said, turning around to face the man and his son completely. "I think you need this more than I do." With a broad smile, she handed the puck over to the little boy and watched his face light up brighter than anything she'd ever seen.

"Really?" the boy exclaimed excitedly.

"Really. Take it."

"Oh my gosh, Dad! This is the best day ever!" the boy jumped up and down grabbing the bottom of his dad's hooded sweatshirt.

"What do we say, buddy?" he said gently through an amused grin.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" he shouted in rapid succession.

"Thank you very much, really. If you can't tell, he's thrilled," the father said, reaching out to shake Bella's hand before disappearing up the stairs and into the crowd.

Soon after the lights went dark, loud music began to blare through the arena and the home team skated back out for the beginning of the game as their names were announced.

.~.~.~.~.~.~.

Edward was pumped.

The lights were flashing, the music was thumping, and the crowd was going wild. It was the perfect night and he was in his element.

The team filed back out onto the ice in the exact same order as they did before every game; Sullivan first, McCarty last. That's how it always was, and superstition told them that that was how it would always be. As his skates hit the ice, he raised his stick into the air just as he always had done. Some players from other teams saw it as a showboat sort of display, but he simply saw it as a salute to the team's fans, and they were the ones that actually mattered.

He caught one final glimpse of Bella, clapping and smiling alongside a small, dark haired girl who he assumed must be Jasper's Alice, before putting her as far out of his mind as he could and focusing on the task at hand. The team's winning streak sat at eleven, and it was a given that every team was chomping at the bit to be the one to finally end it. The Montreal Canadiens were sitting just two points out of playoff contention* and a win on the road would put them back in the hunt for a Stanley Cup run. A win against them wasn't going to be easy, and he needed to keep his head in the game.

The puck dropped and his first shift of the game was quickly underway.

The first period was uneventful with both teams being held scoreless through the first 20 minutes. The second, however, saw a crosschecking* penalty against Montreal and gave Pittsburgh a power play*, allowing Whitlock to score a shorthanded goal* to draw first blood.

Just 2:49 later, Sullivan was able to notch in another goal bringing their lead to two.

Montreal remained scoreless through the second period when the horn sounded and the guys headed into the dressing room for the second intermission.

"I like what I'm seeing out there, boys, I really do," Coach Banner praised once all the players were seated in front of their stalls. "But I need you to crank up the intensity. A loss for the Habs* tonight puts them further out of a playoff spot. You'd better believe they're going to come back in the third ready to drop the gloves*. They're pissed off and they're looking for any way possible to get the game to go their way. I want you to be on your toes and I don't want you to do anything stupid."

The third period began and the atmosphere in the arena was electric. The crowd was cheering, screaming, and banging on the glass louder than Edward had heard them in a very long time and the team was feeding off of the energy.

Just a few seconds into his first shift of the period, he found himself fighting for the puck in the corner with the two Montreal defensemen. He had the puck pinned against the wall with the side of his skate to keep the other two from poking it out of his control, but that also meant he couldn't make a move to score either. He was trapped and all parties involved were getting desperate. In his head, the seconds loudly ticked by, counting down the moments when the situation would finally reach its boiling point.

Edward could almost see it happening in slow motion, feel the shift in the bodies around him inch by inch. He saw the defenseman coming through the reflection on the glass only seconds before he felt the impact of the stick's shaft on his lower back. His skates flew out from under him and his face collided with the force of his full body weight against the glass. He happened to notice two blonde women looking stricken as he slid down the boards and onto the ice.

The puck came loose and one of the defenseman cleared it out and back to the other side of the ice. Edward scrambled to his feet as quickly as he could and raced into the action. However, before he could make it back across the ice, he felt the blade of an opponent's stick hook around his thigh and pull him back off of his feet.

The referee's whistle blew as Edward jumped to his feet again; this time angry and looking for the culprit. Patrice Corneau, the brawny French-Canadian whom Edward had played against in the junior leagues, flashed him a smug, toothless grin

"Qu'est-ce qui ne va pas, Edward? Impossible de rester sur vos pieds?*" he sneered.

"Fuck you!" Edward roared, ripping past the official and launching himself at his opponent. He dropped his gloves onto the ice before grabbing the Frenchman by the collar of his sweater with one hand, and pummeling his face with the other. Meanwhile, Corneau unleashed an attack of his own, striking Edward's face and head with ham-fisted blows.

It was only when Edward could both taste and see blood that the referees stepped in and pulled them apart. Luckily, the blood he saw on his knuckles was only from a minor cut above Corneau's eye and his lip was only split superficially down the middle. Despite how minor the injuries were, it didn't save both Edward and Corneau from the penalty box; two minutes to the Frenchman for hooking and five minutes to Edward for fighting.

"Thanks for the power play, Cullen," Corneau taunted in his thickly accented voice across the ice before they were both escorted into their respective boxes.

Edward was seething; the hook had been blatant and deliberate. He had done it just to get a rise out of him and draw the penalty and he'd played right into it. He was less angry at Corneau and angrier at himself for letting it happen in the first place. And sure enough, as Corneau rejoined his team on the ice, one of the forwards was able to sneak the puck past McCarty, putting Montreal finally on the board.

Normally, when he spent time in the penalty box, he was completely oblivious to what was going on around him outside of the game. He needed to know exactly when his penalty was to expire so that he could join his teammates back on the ice at exactly the right moment. But this time, and he wasn't even sure how he heard it at all, he heard a tapping on the glass to his left. He turned quickly, anger surging through his veins until he was face to face with a pair of concerned, wide, brown eyes.

"You okay?" Bella mouthed soundlessly. Edward only nodded. She smiled warmly back at him. "Go get 'em," she mouthed again, just as the door swung open and he glided back out onto the ice just in time to catch a puck off of Boucher's stick and stuff it into the back of the net behind the Montreal goaltender.

.~.~.~.~.~.~.

The dressing room was filled to capacity with people, players and media alike, when Bella and Alice entered. Bella used her press pass to get them through the door out of habit, even though she was sure Edward would have made sure their entry was cleared using some other method.

Alice recoiled at the overwhelming stench of musk and sweat in the room.

"You'll get used to it," Bella laughed as they breezed past other bystanders like they owned the place.

The room was loud and boisterous as the players, riding high from their latest victory, laughed and carried on with each other. There were however, densely crowded circles formed around the stalls of Edward, Jasper, Emmett and Peter Sullivan. Each of them had several microphones held close to their faces as they answered questions about the game and how they were feeling.

"Edward, what was going through your mind during that scrum with Corneau?" a reporter asked as Bella slid unnoticed into the gathered crowd, again, out of habit.

"Well, uhh… you know, in the heat of the moment I was pretty upset. I felt like that was a pretty nasty hook that really wasn't necessary, so yeah… I retaliated. I probably shouldn't have because they scored on that power play, but it is what it is and all I can do is try and keep a cooler head in the future." Edward flashed an amused, crooked grin that said (without really saying it) that he wasn't sorry at all for what happened.

Slowly, the crowd began to disperse and the players began to disrobe. Alice covered her eyes and slunk in behind Bella's shoulders. Bella, herself, even tried to avert her eyes a bit. Not because she wasn't used to seeing athletes in various states of undress on a regular basis, but because this felt different considering these men were Edward's friends and teammates.

"Umm… is it _normal_ for them to just… you know…" Alice asked, barely peeking out from behind her fingers.

"What? Walk around naked? Yeah, it's pretty normal. Normally, its just sort of part of the job but right now, I'm trying really hard not to look," she giggled girlishly.

"Look at what?" she heard Edward ask, just seconds before she felt him grab her from behind and pull her in close to his chest.

"Oh just the roomful of half-naked men," she replied, tilting her head back and placing a chaste kiss on Edward's chin.

"Wow, babe. And I thought you only had eyes for me," he said, feigning outrage.

"Hey, when it's right in front of my face, what do you expect me to do?" she laughed again. Turning in his arms, she noticed that he'd dressed quickly and was back in the navy blue suit they'd picked out together earlier that evening. "Have you met Alice?"

"No, I haven't yet had the pleasure." Edward took the dark haired girl's hand delicately in his. "It's great to finally meet you, Alice. Thank you for keeping Bella company tonight."

"It was fun," she replied brightly. "I'm just glad I didn't annoy Bella to death with all of my questions. Have you seen Jasper?"

"He's just finishing up. But when he's done, I'm sorry Alice, I'm going to have to steal my girlfriend back from you. I've only got a couple of days with her and I want to utilize every minute." Edward squeezed his arms around Bella's waist and playfully growled into her neck which caused her to, in turn, squeal with laughter.

"I swear to god, I'm not usually like this," she giggled through her fingers to Alice.

"It's okay," she said back, a knowing smile spreading across her lips. "I know exactly how you feel."

* * *

><p>Holy references, Batman!<p>

Check- A minor penalty that occurs when a player holds the stick with both hands and drives the shaft into an opponent. Often times this penalty isn't called unless the action is over the top, or causes injury.

"Put it in my five-hole" - an innuendo playing on the name for the area of the goal right between the goal tender's legs. If a puck goes into the net through the goal tender's legs/feet, it is said to have gone through the five-hole.

Playoff contention - Hockey standings are based off of a point system. At the end of the regular season, the eight teams in each conference (Eastern and Western) with the most points advance on to the playoffs. Each win is worth two points. If a game goes into overtime or shootout, even the losing team will get one point. Playoff standings can change on an almost daily basis.

Power Play - the period of game play when one team has a man advantage over the other team. For example: While Edward and Corneau were both in the penalty box, the teams were still at even strength on the ice. However, when Corneau's penalty expired before Edward's, Montreal had a power play for the remaining three minutes of Edward's penalty because they had one more person on the ice than Pittsburgh.

Shorthanded goal - a goal scored on a team that has less players on the ice than the team that scored the goal.

Please review! You have no idea how much they mean to me. I appreciate all of you so very much =)


	12. What was Missing

Alright everybody, still with me? Ok good. Things are good here in my world; work has picked up (hence the delay in updating) March Madness has started, Edward's team (The Pittsburgh Penguins) are on a 10 game winning streak) and Edward's inspiration made is (second) comeback to the game just last night. All is right with the world. It really is a great time of year to be a sports fan.

**I do not own Twilight. But hot hockey players are all mine. ALL OF THEM =)**

**Playlist: The Original by Incubus (Very fitting, if you're familiar with the song ["Girl you're the original, always were and always will be"]) **

* * *

><p>She was so incredibly gorgeous; just as breathtaking as Edward remembered her. However, no matter how many times he played that night over and over in his mind, his memories never completely did her justice. But there she was in the flesh, standing just a few paces away from him in the crowded, smoky bar. She was laughing with a friend with dark hair and glasses as if the two of them had just heard the funniest joke in the world. The girl at his side, who was trying desperately to hold his attention, faded into the background as if she'd never been there at all.<p>

Edward heard his name and she cocked her head to one side, as if almost interested. But shortly thereafter someone called out to her and Bella shook her hair back over her shoulders exposing her lovely, graceful neck as a boy with sandy colored hair and dark eyes leaned in to press his lips to it. Edward watched from afar as she laughed again and wrapped her arms around the boy's shoulders.

Edward froze.

She was happy – without him. She never thought about him. She didn't care. And why would she? She could have her choice of any man. She'd made her decision and it wasn't him. She'd never even tried to find him.

Edward's heart fell and his stomach twisted into knots. It was the worst feeling he'd ever experienced; worse than losing a game, worse than taking an elbow to the chin, worth than taking a stick to the groin. Nothing compared to this indescribable feeling of emptiness. The rest he had the ability to change, to control, but he couldn't force her to think about him the way he thought about her. He couldn't make her turn around and look at him and realize what was missing.

He closed his eyes to will the image of her without him away and when he opened them he was no longer in the hazy bar. Instead, he was lying comfortably in his oversized bed with a warm body tucked into his side. He brushed the dark hair away from her face to reveal the same angelic face he'd been pining for in his dreams. More times than he'd care to admit, he'd performed the same move; awoken from a dream of her and brushed the hair back from a sleeping brunette only to be disappointed that the face underneath was not the one he'd dreamed about. But this time was different. All the years of disappointment, of inadequacy, and of anger no longer mattered because Bella was finally in his arms where she belonged. He gave her a little squeeze just to make sure he wasn't still dreaming and was not disappointed.

He knew what people thought of him, what they'd _always _thought of him; that he was a spoiled rich kid, that he had everything he could ever dream of, that he lived some sort of privileged life. The truth was, he _did_ have a good life and he always had, but not because things came easily to him, but because he and his parents had worked hard for everything they had. When he'd shown talent on the ice greater than what his local coaches could offer, he'd relied on his grades to get a scholarship to a renowned French-Canadian boarding school where his talents could be cultivated. He worked summers at his friend's parent's dairy farm in Ontario to help pay for his equipment and travel expenses. And when it was time for college, he earned a scholarship there too. His parents were just normal, hardworking people who wouldn't even allow their only son to buy them a new house to thank them for all they'd done for him.

Women were never in short supply for Edward. He had, after all, been quite blessed with good genes but he never had the time to dedicate to girls like some of his friends growing up. And when he got to college, just when he thought things might start to get easier, he met _her_. Bella had effectively ruined him for other women.

The people who didn't know him only saw a boy from a good family, who went to the best schools and had an amazing natural talent that came easily. In reality he was just a guy, with parent's who did everything they could to provide for their only child, who had to work his fingers to the bone to get ahead, who had the same insecurities and doubts about himself as any other kid his age. And they certainly didn't see how hard he was on himself and how much of an emotional wreck he'd been since his and Bella's first encounter.

His heart rate began to slow and he breathed a sigh of relief as the anxiety in his muscles gradually began to subside. Those days were behind him now and he had nothing but good things to look forward. He finally had the life that everyone thought he already had.

.~.~.~.~.~.

Bella could get used to waking up this way; warm, safe, and completely surrounded by two strong, solid arms keeping the rest of the world at bay. She had always thought her own bed to be her own personal heaven, but Edward's was giving it a run for its money.

She lay still in his arms for a long while, just watching the sunlight climb higher up the walls of Edward's bedroom with each passing minute and thinking about the previous night. He had been exhausted when they finally got back to his house, but he used his last bit of energy to whisper sweet words to her about how much it meant to him to have her there with him, and to run his fingers through her hair until she fell asleep.

Everything about him was too good to be true to the point that she often found herself looking for the catch; some secret girlfriend waiting in the wings, or a nursery-full of illegitimate children scattered across the country, or perhaps a well hidden drinking habit complete with a stint in rehab over the offseason.

_Can't you just let yourself be happy for once? _She thought, wistfully. _No, of course not, _she chuckled to herself.

"What's so funny?" Edward asked in a thick voice.

"Nothing, just thinking. I didn't mean to wake you."

"You didn't. I'm used to getting up around this time anyway. Besides, even if you did I'd thank you for it."

"Oh yeah? Why's that?"

"I want to spend as much time with you as I can while you're here. Sleep is a waste of time when I could be enjoying your company," he said, rolling over to nuzzle her hair and place a soft kiss on her temple.

She bit her lip to try and hide her gleeful smirk.

"I guess you think you're pretty smooth using lines like that, huh?" she joked.

Edward shifted to prop himself up on his elbow and look down at her face.

"It's not a line. I'm just genuinely crazy about you and eager to make up for all the time I've already missed."

Bella searched his piercing green eyes for any tells that he could be being less than truthful and found nothing. Her stomach fluttered and she didn't know what to say back to him. So instead she said nothing at all, and pulled him in for a kiss.

"Join me in the shower?" he murmured against her lips to which she simply nodded with a playful smile.

.~.~.~.~.~.~.

The day passed much as it had the day before. Edward had team commitments in the early afternoon, only this time instead of practice it was a team appearance at a children's hospital for photos and autographs. Bella had promised him that it was alright to go without her, but he insisted that he'd feel like less of a jerk for working during her visit if he could at least have her nearby.

While he attended to team business, Bella stuck close to fellow WAG Charlotte, the wife of the team's captain. She was a sweet woman, with long auburn hair and freckles that made her look quirky and interesting.

"Almost makes you want to have a few of your own, doesn't it?" Charlotte asked after having caught Bella staring a bit too dreamily at Edward with a group of children.

"What? Oh umm…" Bella cleared her throat uncomfortably.

"Its okay, sweetie. I'm just kidding. Well… mostly. I think our first may have been conceived shortly after one of these things. There's just something about a big, strong man and a child. It speaks to our primal instincts I guess," Charlotte said with a smile.

"I guess so. I'm not even sure if I even want kids. And Edward and I are still so new, we haven't even talked about it. Jesus… do I _want_ to have that talk with him?" Bella felt like she was on the verge of breaking out into a cold sweat.

"Slow down," she laughed. "I'm certainly not trying to push anything on you. I've just known Edward for a while now and he's wonderful with kids. Did you know he lived with Peter and I when he was first drafted?"

"No, he didn't tell me that."

"Yep. My daughter, Cassandra, was four and I'd just had my son so I wasn't exactly keen on the idea of taking in a houseguest for an extended period of time. But Peter begged me to let him stay. He said that Edward could help out with the kids and give us a little bit of a break. I wasn't convinced. You know, I thought what could this 22 year old kid possibly know about taking care of two small children, but Pete was so adamant about it that I eventually gave in.

"At first he didn't know the first thing about kids, but he was a quick learner. It wasn't long before Cassie wanted _Eddie_ to read her stories before bed or to take her swimming in the pool. And he was so great with her too, you'd think she was the apple of his eye. Sean, my son, took him a little longer to get used to only because he was terrified that he'd drop him or hurt him somehow. But he learned quickly there too. I had him changing diapers and preparing bottles in no time.

He lived with us for about a year. Cassie was heartbroken when he finally found a place of his own. He had her convinced that the two of them were going to get married when she got old enough, so it was hard for her to see him go."

Bella smiled in spite of herself as her mind conjured images of Edward playing with a little girl with long brown hair and jade green eyes. Just then Edward glanced her way from across the room and flashed her a dazzling smile.

_Would it really be so bad to imagine a future with him? _she thought to herself, wistfully. _No… I guess there isn't any harm in a little wishful thinking. _

.~.~.~.~.~.

It made Edward happy to see Bella being sociable with Charlotte and a few of the other team wives and girlfriends. Charlotte and Peter Sullivan were important people in his life and it seemed like a good omen that the woman who'd stolen his heart got along with at least one of them easily. The way the two women laughed and carried on together, completely independent of him, made him hopeful that a future together might actually be possible.

Bella had her reservations about their relationship, and he knew that full well going into it, but that didn't stop him from feeling like he'd finally reached his long sought after goal and that the rest would be a piece of cake.

As he thought, Edward noticed a young girl, no older than 8 or 9 sitting off on her own near one of the large picture windows.

"Hey," he said brightly, plopping down in a heap in the chair next to her. "Mind if I take a load off here for a second?"

"N-no," she stammered with a supremely surprised look on her face.

"Thanks. I'm Edward," he said, offering the girl his hand.

"I'm Bree," she replied with a timid smile as she lightly shook his hand.

"So, Bree … is hockey not your thing?"

"Well… I like it. Mostly because my dad likes it, but I like it too. I used to take skating lessons before I got sick. I want to be a figure skater someday."

"Want to know a secret?" he asked, leaning over and whispering in the young girl's ear. Her eyes lit up and she nodded enthusiastically.

"When I was your age, maybe a little bit older, I was trying out for my first pee wee team. The coach said I was good enough but that I had a heavy stride. He said I needed to work on being 'lighter on my feet.' I didn't know what that meant really, until the coach suggested to my mom that I take figure skating lessons."

Bree squealed with laughter.

"I was so embarrassed! And I _really _didn't want any of my friends to know. I agreed to do it but only if I could have the time slot nobody wanted. So from then on I started taking lessons at _5 AM_. Believe me; I was _not _excited to be there. And I was even less excited that my new coach was this girl who couldn't have been older than 16 or 17. When I saw her for the first time I wanted to quit right then and there. I thought, 'What could this _girl _possibly teach me?' But my mom said that I had to do it if I wanted my hockey playing to get better. So I gave it a shot. And let me tell you, that girl ran me ragged. I'd never worked so hard in my life. But I also had a lot of fun doing it, which really surprised me. It wasn't long before I didn't dread those 5 AM practices so much anymore. And you know what? My playing really did get better. After a while all my teammates wanted to know what my secret was. But I never told 'em. So now the only people who know are you and me."

"I can keep a secret. I bet you looked funny doing it," Bree laughed.

"Yeah… I probably did." Edward smiled and leaned over the bump Bree's shoulder with his own. "So tell me, why are you sitting over here by yourself?"

"Well… my dad, he's a big fan. When I was a little kid he used to talk about how awesome Mario Le-Moo* was and how he was his idol growing up. My dad wanted to be here today to meet you, but he had to work and so did my mom. I know things have been hard for them since I've been sick. They don't want me to know, but I know. I was going to have you sign something for my dad and have it as a surprise for him, but I didn't have anything that you could sign. So I didn't want to take up your time when there were other people who had brought things to have autographed. My dad will be really excited to know I got to talk to you though. My mom probably will too. She always says you're a looker, whatever that means."

Edward laughed to himself.

"Listen Bree, I'll tell you what; I'm going to make sure that you and your parents get something special from me. Okay?"

"Really? That's really nice of you."

"Alright boys and girls," one of the nurses said cheerfully. "Its time to wrap things up because the Penguins have to get ready for tonight's game. So everyone say their goodbyes and get one last hug in. What do we say to these nice gentlemen?"

A unison "Thank you" rang out through the colorful room as the kids seized their last opportunities to rub elbows with their heroes.

"I have to go now, but you have my word that you, your mom and your dad –"

"My big brother too?"

"Yeah, your big brother too. You guys will all have something special from me. Thanks for letting me spend some time with you today, Bree. I'll see you soon."

Edward leaned over and gathered the little girl in a big bear hug that made her giggle.

He smiled one more time before heading over to where Bella and Charlotte still stood, chatting.

"Hey Char, remind me to get some tickets for that girl's family, okay?"

"On the sly, I'm guessing?" Charlotte replied with a smirk.

"Yeah, I'm sure giving away tickets at these things is probably against some sort of policy but I think when she gets out of here she deserves a good time. Maybe we could get a pair of tickets in one of the boxes for just her parents. I bet they probably don't have many opportunities to spend a night out, you know?"

Charlotte and Bella exchanged meaningful glances that made Edward wonder what sort of unspoken conversation was going on between them.

"You're a good man, Edward Cullen," Charlotte sighed, placing her hand on Edward's shoulder.

* * *

><p>Daaawwwwwww...<p>

The scene in the bar, that's an allusion to the coresponding one-shot I wrote for Fandom for Texas. Its just a snapshot of one night in Edward's life while still in college. If you're interested in reading it, PM me and I'll send it to you.

* Mario Lemieux (Mario Le-moo, as Bree called him) is a Canadian former professional hockey player and co-owner of the Pittsburgh Penguins. He is widely recognized as one of the greatest players of all time. He played 17 seasons with the Penguins between 1984 and 2006. He is currently principal owner and chairman of the board of the team and brought it out of brankruptcy in 1999. He is the only person to have ever won a Stanley Cup both as a player and an owner.


	13. Primal

You guys will have to excuse me. I've been in the midst of NHL playoffs and sadly my beloved Penguins' season has come to an early end. I guess the one good thing to come out of it is that some of the action from their playoff series inspired events in this chapter. So... yay?

**I do not own Twilight but hot hockey players are all mine. ALL OF THEM =)**

**Playlist: Come Out & Play by The Offspring and Closer by Nine Inch Nails**

* * *

><p>"You really don't want to come?" Edward asked with a cocked eyebrow.<p>

"The weather is nasty and I don't want to be out in it if I don't have to be. I'll be right here when you get back, I promise. Bring me home a win, okay?" she said with a smile before placing a soft kiss on his lower lip.

"Anything for you," he replied with a smile of his own and a charming wink.

It had been a long day and her mind had been a complete jumble ever since her conversation with Charlotte. The only way she could get a real handle on how she was feeling was to talk to Angela, and she could only do that with Edward out of the house.

Once he was out the door and into the whipping winter air, she immediately retrieved her phone from her purse and dialed Angela's number.

"This had better be an emergency, B. You're supposed to be on your man-vacation, not shooting the breeze with me," Angela said smartly as soon as she picked up the line.

"He's got a game tonight. You were my first choice in back up companions for the evening."

"Well thanks. I guess," she laughed. "So how's it going? Have you fallen desperately in love with him yet? Or have you decided that all men are pigs?"

Bella hesitated for a moment, not entirely sure how to answer her friend's question.

"Whoa, this is either really good or really bad if you didn't bite back with something immediately." Angela knew her _entirely_ too well.

"It's really… good. Better than good. Jesus Christ, Ang, I actually let myself think about having kids with him this morning!"

"Who in the hell are you and what have you done with my best friend?"

"I don't know, Angela! This isn't me, is it? No, no, _no. _Isabella Swan doesn't want kids, does she? No. She doesn't want to settle down or change her life. Things are just peachy the way they are."

"But…?" Angela trailed off.

Bella sighed, "But… maybe I'm starting to change my mind?" She almost hesitated to say the words aloud, out of fear that by saying them there was no going back.

"Someone's finally melted that cold heart of yours," Angela laughed heartily.

"I'm not cold hearted, and I resent you saying so!" Bella gasped in mock offence.

"Oh give me a break, you know what I mean. So what did he do to hijack your ovaries today?"

Bella recounted her morning with Charlotte at the hospital and how Edward had interacted with the little girl who was sitting off by herself.

"Oh hell…" Angela laughed. "That's intense. You'd have to seriously have no soul for that not to get you."

"I know, right?" Bella laughed at her own predicament. "This is so not me, Ang. It really isn't."

"So what? Things change. You've got to have a little spontaneity and let things come as they may. Honestly Bella, I was proud of you for even going out there to see him in the first place. That in and of itself was a huge step outside of your comfort zone. It sounds like this weekend is making you think about things you've probably never allowed yourself to even fantasize about before. I'll let you in on a little secret; the life you always thought you'd have is no better and no worse than the life you're just now letting yourself consider being a possibility. The two are not mutually exclusive, I might add. So what if you go off book a little? Variety is the spice of life and I say do whatever makes you happy."

"And this is exactly why I call you with these things. It's still early, but maybe… maybe there's room for two in my plans," she said with a smile.

"So, have you put any thought into dropping the bomb and coming out publically?" Angela asked.

"No," Bella sighed. "This whole thing with Riley has gotten so blown out of proportion, it's ridiculous. I love my job and I don't want my personal involvements to compromise the reputation I've built up for myself. But at the same time, I know that if Edward and I are going to be together long term, it's going to be really hard to keep it under wraps. Besides, I don't know if I have the energy to keep lying about it."

"You know Mike loves you. He's told you himself that he depends on you for everything. If he didn't trust in your work completely, he wouldn't have sent you to the poker tournament in his place. He could have sent anyone else. He could have sent Riley, but he didn't. He sent _you_. Everybody else at the network sees your worth. Riley is just a petty, jealous child. He can only hurt you if you let him. If it were me, I'd tell Mike. Just get it out in the open and take away whatever Riley may or may not think he's got over you. You don't have to go into the gory details, just say, 'Hey Mike, it's like this; Edward and I knew each other in college and we've recently reconnected and things are starting to take a romantic turn. In the interest of full disclosure, I just wanted to let you know.' Then there's really nothing anybody can say about it."

Bella took a deep breath as she thought about her friend's words. Angela really _was_ right. It would sure as hell take the wind out of Riley's sails if she just came out and admitted what was going on. And the more she thought about it, the more her hesitation to be forthcoming about the whole situation seemed silly. It wasn't like she covered Edward's team on any sort of regular basis. She covered all sports, but she concentrated mostly on the teams in the Chicago area. Someone might call her biased at some point, but so what? She'd just refrain from covering topics where that could potentially become an issue.

Bella breathed a sigh of relief while at the same time wanting to slap herself for ever being so stupid.

After she hung up with Angela, she made the decision that there wasn't any reason to keep her relationship secret. She couldn't wait to tell Edward that they didn't have to wait any longer to come out publically. With a smile on her face, she ordered some Chinese takeout, and settled into the luxurious leather sofa in the living room to watch the game.

.~.~.~.~.~.

It was the third period and Bella's box of lo mein noodles sat long forgotten on the floor beside her. Bella herself had long given up trying to remain in one place and had since taken up either sitting on the floor in front of the couch with her knees drawn up close to her chest, or pacing back and forth behind the couch.

The Penguins were playing the Philadelphia Flyers, and everyone who knew anything about the sport knew that this game between bitter instate rivals would be ugly. But no one had any idea that it would get nearly has ugly as it had gotten.

Edward had scored on a quick, but easy, pass from Sullivan just 15 seconds into the game. Moments later, while Edward and his teammates were in mid celebration, Emmett got into a verbal altercation with one of the Flyers' defensemen on the opposite end of the ice. Boucher saw the two of them jawing at each other and quickly skated to his goaltender's aide. With a forceful check with his stick across the offending player's chest, Boucher effectively incited what turned out to be a near bench clearing brawl which resulted in two players from both teams being ejected from the game with major penalties. From then on, both teams seemed to be teetering on the edge of sanity, both just one wrong uttered word away from all hell breaking loose. When the Flyers netted a goal to even the score, another fight broke out between Whitlock and the shaggy haired forward who'd scored on them. The two were pulled apart fairly quickly, but not before both were bloodied and bruised, and resulted in both spending time in the penalty box.

When the second period began, the game just continued to unravel further. Emmett let three more goals through, and as the Penguins saw their twelve game winning streak possibly coming to an end, they fought back with everything they had. Much of that included fists. Before the second period had expired, three more players, two Penguins and a Flyer, had been ejected. Everyone in the stands and those left on the benches could only look on in disbelief.

Edward had managed to stay out of the fray each time, but he hadn't stayed quiet. More times than Bella could count, the cameras panned to his face as soundless words of frustration and anger poured from his mouth directed at his opponents. Referees had to separate Edward from a few of them on several different occasions. Bella was a wreck with nerves as she suddenly wished she could be there, in her same seat from the game before, and look into his eyes to calm him down just as she had after his fight with Patrice Corneau.

When the puck dropped signally the start of the third and final period, the Penguins were down four to one and the team needed desperately to rally back if they stood any chance of winning the game.

Bella sat fidgeting on the floor because sitting still on the sofa had become a chore. Edward was electrifying as always to watch, but even he was showing signs of stress. However despite the sloppy passing and subpar physicality, he was able to slip a goal over the shoulder of Philadelphia's hulking, Russian goaltender.

Sullivan netted another shortly thereafter and things seemed to finally be going their way. That is until the Flyers snuck another past Emmett with barely a minute left in the game. All were visibly frustrated and more fights broke out as the clock ticked down. It was obvious that they had nothing left to lose; the match was already settled.

Edward did his best to separate his teammates from the melee, shouting in their faces about how the team couldn't afford them getting suspended for acting stupid. Unfortunately, he couldn't get to them all and several more major penalties were assessed.

The officials were able to get everyone calmed down enough to at least let the last few seconds of the game wind down before the final horn blew to signal the end of the game and the end of their streak that spanned over nearly three months.

Out of sheer anger at the team's implosion, Bella watched Edward hurl a water cooler down the ramp out of sheer anger at the team's implosion as the team retreated to their dressing room, single file. When it was all said and done, pieces of broken sticks littered the blood spattered ice and everyone watching was left at a loss for words.

She sighed deeply as she turned off the television. Edward was going to be in a foul mood when he got home and she had no idea what to expect. She'd never seen him anything less than jovial except for the brief moment in which they'd argued shortly before their locker room rendezvous and the idea of being faced with anything different was not exactly appealing.

_Better to find out now rather than later, _that nagging part of her brain noted. _You definitely don't want another one of your hands with a temper problem. _

Bella grumbled to herself as she tidied up what was left of her dinner. There were absolutely no parallels to be drawn between Edward and James. None, whatsoever, and she was pissed that even the most cynical parts of herself would go down that road.

_James Wesson… _now that was a person she didn't allow herself to think about often. Truthfully, she owed a lot of who she was to James and their relationship. It had made her stronger, more self-assured. But it was certainly not an experience she ever cared to repeat. The only memory she ever let herself dwell on for more than the briefest of moments was the night she met him in the hotel bar. She'd witnessed Edward's NHL debut and it had brought up a flood of memories that she'd tried to repress her entire collegiate career. She'd felt so vulnerable and exposed seeing Edward's face on television that she would have done just about anything to escape the way his piercing green eyes made her feel, even from hundreds of miles away. She thought she was running away from her problems that night. Little did she know, she was actually running head first into one.

.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

The night was as black as Edward had ever seen it in the city. Clouds covered the moon and even head lights and street lamps seemed powerless to penetrate the blanketing darkness and snow. He probably shouldn't have even been driving in his current state; tense and completely on edge, every muscle in his body contracted tightly in a futile effort to keep the rage inside. He tried to calm himself, to make sure he didn't look completely psychotic when he came face to face with Bella again but nothing seemed to help. He couldn't get past how he and his team had been made a fool of by the worst possible culprits. If they had lost the game the night before to Montreal, he could have brushed it off and not thought much about it, but a loss to Philadelphia was much more personal.

When he finally made it home, he sat in his car for several long minutes taking in slow, calming breaths in an effort to appear more normal. He didn't get this way often, and he knew the feeling would pass without incident but the last thing he wanted to do was to be even remotely rude or unkind to Bella. He wanted to be in control of himself enough to know that he would only treat her in the manner in which she deserved.

The drive home took nearly twice as long as it normally would and the post-game interviews ran long, so by the time he was walking through to door of his condo, it was well past midnight.

The house was silent and dark, almost empty feeling. His heart began to race again and he was overcome with the need to see her, to feel her, to know that she was still there.

He took the stairs two and a time until he reached the top floor landing. His bedroom door was slightly ajar and a soft, warm light spilled into the hall.

Edward pushed the door open to find her lying on the bed, fast asleep; one of the books from his collection lay open beside her. He thought that seeing her would make him help to feel more composed, but instead a different kind of urgency rose inside of him. His muscles twitched with unspent energy and his need for release became almost all encompassing.

Quickly, almost frantically, he took off his suit jacket, shirt and tie and slung them across the foot of the bed causing Bella to stir.

"Edward," she purred, sleepily. "You're home."

"I couldn't wait to get back to you," he said in a voice that was so shaky he hardly recognized it as his own.

"Are you okay, baby?" she asked, propping herself up on one arm.

"I just… I'm just happy you're here. It's been a long night."

"I know, baby. I know. Just come to bed, okay? You'll feel better in the morning." She gave him a groggy smile and patted the bed beside her.

He looked down at her, wearing his tshirt with bare legs and messy, bedraggled hair, and something primal came over him. He leaned down and pressed his lips to hers and he felt heat immediately begin to spread over his super cooled skin. She started to giggle playfully but when he didn't stop she instead sighed into his mouth as her free arm wrapped around his shoulders. He eased her back down onto the pillows as he continued to let her warmth spread over him. The feeling that normally lulled him into a state of comfort now seemed to almost be whipping him into a frenzy.

That sense of urgency increased; he needed to be closer to her, he needed to feel her, he needed, more than anything else in the world, to be inside of her.

Frantically, his shaking hands found their way into her panties. She gasped in surprise but didn't shirk his advances. Instead, she pulled him closer, mewling softly against his lips, slowly, deliberately, rolling her hips against his talented fingers.

He couldn't take it any longer, every part of his being felt like it was going to explode if he didn't do something soon.

Somehow, despite his anxious tremors, he managed to rid himself of the remainder of his clothing without incident. He leaned back to stand over her in an almost predatory fashion. His eyes seared a burning trail down her body as he took the sight of her in; so vulnerable, so exposed, so willing, so eager, all without knowing what lay in store.

The reprieve from his near-mania was short lived and his desperation quickly resumed control of his actions as he yanked her panties down her legs. She let out a yelp that sounded half excited and half scared. He claimed her with his eyes and his hands, hungrily raking over her body as he pushed the oversized tshirt up her torso until her breasts were eventually exposed to the cool air of his bedroom.

He nudged her legs apart as he climbed onto the bed between them. He captured her mouth with his own again and without warning, plunged himself into her warm, wet, center. She cried out in pleasure and surprise as his own growls of satisfaction rumbled through his chest.

"Edward," she sighed with heavy lidded eyes as she braced her hands on either of his biceps.

That one word was all the encouragement he needed; all rational thought left his body and his baser instincts took over. He leaned down heavily on her petite frame and buried his face in the crook of her neck and his body moved of its own accord. Growls, moans, and other animalistic sounds of satisfaction escaped him without any conscious effort of his own. Bella gasped and sighed with every move of his body against hers.

He had only handled her this roughly once before, and it was a surprisingly welcome change from the sweet, tender mornings they'd spent together since her arrival. Words failed her, so all Bella could do was rake her finger nails down his tightly muscled back to let him know that she wanted this every bit as much as he did. As his thrusts intensified, Bella clamped her mouth around top of his shoulder, and sunk her teeth into his rigid, salty flesh. She didn't break the skin, but the tiny prick of pain was enough to shatter him into a million pieces inside of her.

The primitive fog that had consumed his mind seemed to recede as he rolled off of her to lay on his back in the middle of the bed, sweaty and panting. His body felt spent and used and the fatigue of the entire night's exertion came crashing down on him all at once.

From beside him, he heard Bella sigh as she slid off of the bed and shuffled across the carpet. His body felt so heavy he couldn't even lift his head to see where she'd gone. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the bathroom light flick on and heard the sink turn on. A moment later, the water shut off and the light went out again and he felt her climb back onto the bed beside him. The sweet relief of sleep began to pull him under but not before he felt her tuck the blankets around his sprawled body.

"Goodnight, Edward," she said softly before turning off the light and rolling away from him in the darkness.

* * *

><p>So how do you feel about Edward's reaction?<p>

If you know anything about hockey, you probably know exactly where the events in this chapter came from, since it was all anybody could talk about for a while. If not, here's a link to a video and an article about what happened : www [dot] huffingtonpost [dot] com [slash] 2012 [slash] 04 [slash] 15 [slash] flyers-penguins-game-3-fight_n_1427166 [dot] html

If nothing else, it really gives you a sense of how brutal this sport can be and just how much these two teams hate each other.


	14. 20 Questions

**Again, my absence is inexcusable. Sigh... I've worked and reworked this chapter over and over again until it came out to something I was happy with. I hope you all enjoy! As always, I love, enjoy, and appreciate every review I get, so do please keep them coming! **

**I do not own Twilght but hot hockey players are all mine. ALL OF THEM =) **

**Playlist: After the Storm by Mumford & Sons**

* * *

><p>Late the next morning, Edward was pulled from sleep by the pain of his nagging sore muscles; far more severe than he normally experienced. He groaned and rolled over to wrap himself around Bella as he'd done the morning before, but found her side of the bed cold and empty. His eyes snapped open and his back and abs protested uncomfortably as he sat up far more quickly than he probably should have.<p>

"Bella?" he called, but his voice was so hoarse that a sound barely registered.

When he heard no reply, he rolled his stiff body out of bed and pulled his discarded slacks from the night before up his legs.

After a brief look into the upstairs rooms, the smell of coffee eventually drew him downstairs to the kitchen where he found her typing on her laptop at his kitchen table.

"You're up early," he said in a gravel filled voice.

"It's 10:30 actually," she replied curtly.

"Hey, you ok?" he asked as he put his hands on her shoulders from behind.

Bella sighed before closing her laptop and looking up at him. "Yeah, I'm fine," she said with a tight smile.

"You don't seem fine. Did I do something?" he asked, taking a seat at the table beside her.

She took another deep breath and mulled her words over carefully before opening her mouth to speak. "Last night…"

He raked his hand over his face. "Oh fuck, last night," he groaned, his mind flashing back to the game and the anger he'd felt at the loss.

"It was… odd, don't you think?" she asked, timidly.

"Well yeah, a total fluke. I'm not normally that… irrational."

"Good," she laughed nervously. "It was good, of course, but … different, I guess. I don't know, I guess it sort of scared me."

"I wouldn't exactly call it good. I mean, there were a lot of things I definitely could have done better."

Edward looked across the table to find Bella staring back at him with a supremely puzzled expression.

"Wait… what are you talking?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

"The game. What are _you _talking about?"

Bella's face stayed blank for a moment longer before she cracked a wry smile and rolled her eyes dramatically in his direction.

"So the sex has already gotten so mundane he forgets," she laughed sarcastically to herself.

"Wait, what? The sex hasn't… oh…_oh_! Jesus Christ, no! No, no, no, Bella it's not like that at all. I just – the game, it was huge… and it fucking sucked! But that doesn't mean that I forgot about you or what we – you know. How could I? I'm sorry, my whole body hurts and I'm not thinking straight. Can we… I don't know, start over, I guess?"

Bella sighed and smiled. "The do-over is sort of our M.O, isn't it?"

"Seems like it," he said with a smile, taking her hands in his. "I absolutely did not forget about you and me last night. In fact, I should be thanking you for dealing with me and keeping me from going completely insane."

She looked back at him bewildered. "I'm sorry, you're going to have to clarify what you mean."

"When I got home," Edward sighed, "I felt this… panic. It was a feeling I can't really describe. When I saw you lying in bed, it was like everything I'd been trying to keep in check all night long, all the rage and the aggression and the disappointment, sort of came up to the surface. I had to… let it out somehow. It was almost like I wasn't even in control of myself anymore and my instincts took over; sort of like I was on the outside looking in. And you… you were exactly what I needed. If you hadn't been there, I probably would have ended up punching a wall or something, breaking my hand, and being out of commission for weeks. But you _were _there, and you were like a tether holding me down, making sure I didn't lose it."

Bella had been silently staring at their clasped hands while he talked, never letting her face show any indication as to what she was thinking or feeling.

"Bella? Talk to me, please? You've got the best poker face I've ever seen, I can't tell what's going on in your head right now," he said gently while flashing her a pleading grin.

"When you came home, I didn't know what to expect," she began. "I knew you wouldn't be yourself but I really didn't expect _that. _I mean, it was good. Don't get me wrong, I _liked _it. But… sex is a really emotional thing for me, and when you just sort of crashed afterward I didn't know what to think. I guess my insecurities went crazy and I started thinking things I haven't thought about myself in a really long time."

"Baby, what are you talking about? What could you possibly have to be insecure about? I'll freely admit, I was the asshole boyfriend who fell asleep without making sure his woman was satisfied. And I will gladly spend every night from now on making up for it if you'll let me. But you have nothing whatsoever to be insecure about. Why would you feel that way?" he asked, squeezing her hands until she finally brought her eyes up to meet his.

"Let's just say there was a time when being left unfulfilled by the person I was with was a regular occurrence. And sometimes, especially when he was angry, he'd get mean. When someone tells you something enough times, it doesn't take long before you start to believe it yourself." She dropped her hands from his and let her eyes fall with them.

"You listen to me, Isabella Swan," he said, sliding off of his chair and onto his knees in front of her. "You are perfect and you should always be treated as such. I cannot apologize enough for how I was with you last night and I sure as hell never meant to make you feel anything less than spectacular or reopen old wounds." He placed his hand underneath her chin and tilted her face up so that she had to look at him again. "I'm sorry, baby. I really am. I never want to scare you again."

"It was stupid. I know you're not like him," she said, tears filling her eyes.

"You're damn right I'm not. And whoever he is, he'd better pray he and I never cross paths."

She laughed in relief. "It was stupid really. I'm glad I could be there for you and give you what you need. I know that sometimes it'll be one-sided, and that's okay. I want to give you what you want and what you need when I can. It's just… the last time I felt as much for someone as I do for you, I came out on the other side broken."

He cradled her face in his hands as his green eyes bore into hers. "I promise I won't break you, Bella."

She laughed as tears slid down her cheeks and she flung herself forward into his waiting arms.

.~.~.~.~.~.~.

Bella wished that every day could be like the one she'd spent hibernating in Edward's condo. After their talk that morning, the two of them had decided to spend the day just enjoying each other's company. They'd hardly been more than an arm's length away from each other all afternoon except for quick trips to the bathroom and once for Edward to slip away into his "man cave" to make a phone call. He'd been very secretive as to what the phone call was about, but Bella was so wrapped up in a blissful cocoon that she couldn't even force herself to care.

After watching a movie together, Edward let his massive television go black and he pulled her close so that she was curled tightly into his side. The two of them sat together in silence for a long while just listening to the crackling and hissing of the fire in the fireplace and watching clumps of melted slush fall from the eaves over the windows.

"You awake?" he said in a voice barely above a whisper.

"Mmhmm," she hummed.

"Do you feel up to another game of twenty questions?"

"Like the night after the poker tournament at the diner?" she asked, craning her head back against his shoulder to look up at him.

"Sure. Why not? There's still so much we don't know about each other, wouldn't you agree?"

"Okay… but I get to pass if I don't want to answer."

"You get _one _chance to pass. The rest you have to answer. I promise not to judge or hold anything against you in future blackmail attempts." He gave her his most dazzling smile as she stared back up at him contemplating his proposal.

"Fine, ask away," she relented with a sigh.

"I knew you could be a good sport when you wanted to be," he laughed, giving her a quick kiss on the tip of her nose. "Why don't you start us off."

"Hmm… okay, when did you lose your virginity?"

"The summer between grades 10 and 11. What are your parents like?"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, that's all I get? No context, no first time horror stories, no nothing?"

"You asked when I lost it, so technically _when _is all I have to tell you. Next time, ask a more detailed question if you want a more detailed answer. So, what are your parents like?" he asked again with a smug grin on his face.

Bella huffed. "My dad is reserved, quiet, and stoic; I get my poker face from him. My mom is flighty, kindhearted, and fiercely loyal. She always wears her heart on her sleeve. My parents divorced when I was six and I can't really remember a time when they were together. I guess that's probably a good thing because, with the way I know them now, for the life of me I can't picture a world where the two of them would have ever even gotten together in the first place. My mom remarried when I was nine, and it was my step-dad who really got me into sports. He was a minor league baseball player; played short stop. He didn't have any kids of his own so he treated me sort of like the son he never had. He's a batting coach for a team in Florida now. I think my dad secretly harbors some resentment against Phil for being the one to inspire me. He never remarried. I think he never got over my mom, to be honest. Sometimes when he talks about her, he gets this look on his face and he almost looks happy. I mean, I think my dad really _is _happy, for the most part; he just doesn't look it."

She had a glow about her when she spoke about her parents that made Edward smile

"Alright, my turn," she continued. "What was your first time like? And don't spare any details just because I didn't ask for specifics, smart ass."

"Alright, alright," he chuckled. "A little backstory: My coach in juniors knew that when I went to high school, I was going to need to be in an elite program. Where I really wanted to be was Collège Antoine-Girouard* in Québec, but… I didn't speak French, so that was out. So instead, I went to Appleby College in Oakville, Ontario, right outside of Toronto for grades 9 and 10. My main objectives were to play hockey and become a French speaker as quickly as possible, so all I did was play and study. My only friends were guys on the team. They all had girlfriends, and when some of them started having sex, naturally I was jealous. The only time I ever got a break was during the summer when I'd spend a few months working on my friend's parent's dairy farm outside of Hamilton to make some extra money. But even then it was studying and working instead of studying and hockey.

"So anyway, the summer between grades 10 and 11 came and I'd finally gotten to the point where I was pretty fluent in French, I'd gotten a scholarship spot on the Antoine-Girouard team, and I'd be moving to Québec in the fall. I was pretty damn pleased with myself, so I guess you could say I let my hair down a little.

"One weekend we had plans to drive into Toronto to see a Blue Jays* game, but at the last minute my buddy's cousin got shipped up to the farm for the summer and his parents wanted us to entertain her since she'd be attending Appleby in the fall. I was pretty bummed at first because we thought having a girl around would put a major cramp in our style because all we really wanted to do was relax and watch some baseball. But as it turned out, she was gorgeous so I didn't mind so much.

"Hamilton's only about an hour outside of Toronto so we thought my buddy's car would make the drive easy. Of course, halfway there we broke down on the side of the road. We're hockey players, not mechanics… we had no idea what to do. We're freaking out; cussing, yelling, the whole nine yards, but she just calmly pops the hood, determines that the radiator has just overheated, pours some water on it and tells my friend not to be such a lead foot. I was in love.

"Turns out she was fun as hell to be around. Tall, blonde, really smart, liked a lot of the same things as I did; you name it, she was my perfect high school girl. We hit it off really well, and by the end of the trip we were already holding hands and making out. I'd never really had a girlfriend until then so all of this stuff was completely new to me. Things were easy though, because we were living just down the hall from each other. We had to be really careful not to let my buddy's parents know that we were an item, or they'd probably have sent one of us back home.

"By the end of the summer, she was super excited about us going off to school together. I finally broke the news to her that I wouldn't be joining her at Appleby. She was heartbroken and I felt like an ass. I thought she'd hate me for letting her believe that we'd be able to continue after the summer but she didn't. She said she wanted us to end on a high note so when our last day of chores were over, we had dinner with the family but snuck out after dark to spend time together in the barn. She'd laid out a blanket and had some candles lit all around. She said later that she hadn't gone out there with the intention of us having sex, but one thing just sort of lead to another and before I knew it we were naked under a blanket on some hay. It was clumsy and awkward but I'm proud to say I lasted longer than three seconds. When it was over, we just lay there together for a while. She cried and I apologized and we promised that we'd keep in touch.

"We did keep in touch for a while, but as the school year went on emails and phone calls got fewer and fewer. The next summer, I went back to work on the farm and she came to visit for a couple of weeks. By then she had a boyfriend and things were a little weird at first but we realized how much we actually cared about each other and decided that we'd stay just friends."

"That's actually really sweet. Jesus, is there anything about you that isn't absolutely perfect?" Bella huffed playfully.

"Believe me, I'm far from perfect. Last night should show you that."

"What was her name?"

"My first? Rose. Well, Rosalie actually. Rosalie Hale."

"Do you still talk to her?" "I used to. We'd talk on the phone from time to time, or I'd send her a random email here and there, but I haven't heard from her in probably two years. Last I heard she was helping her parents expand their family business. They had a couple of small car dealerships in Michigan. Anyway, enough about that; it's my turn and I want to know about your first time."

"It wasn't nearly as picture-perfect-teen-comedy as yours, I can tell you that much," she laughed. "I dated a few guys in high school but I didn't _give it up _until my senior year. It wasn't exactly by choice, I might add. My boyfriend was absolutely terrified of my dad and he was sure that deflowering the police chief's daughter would be a death sentence. Believe me, I would push things; we'd get really hot and heavy, I'd tell him I was ready and he'd automatically start to panic. He'd say things like, 'Are you sure your dad won't be coming home?'" Bella rolled her eyes and laughed. "I totally understand why he felt that way now, but as a teenager… oh my god, all I wanted was to just have sex already!"

"Duly noted. Although how a red-blooded teenaged boy could ever resist you is beyond me. I know I couldn't." He squeezed her tightly and nuzzled her ear with his nose.

"My friends and I were getting hotel rooms after prom, and we agreed that we'd do it then because it was the only way he could be sure my dad wouldn't barge in and castrate him. But when it finally came down to it, he had so much anxiety that the poor guy could hardly get it up. And when he did, he was shaking like a leaf. Barely two minutes in and it was over. I guess I took pity on him and didn't push it. We broke up a few weeks later when I went off to school.

"Fun fact: the next person I slept with was you, Mr. Cullen," she purred with a smirk.

"Is that right? Well I hope you saw me as a mulligan for your first _real _time," he said, leaning over and kissing her beautiful, smiling lips.

"Much better the second time around," she giggled against his mouth. "Okay, my turn. What was your most embarrassing moment?"

"Jeez… I don't embarrass easily," he mused, rubbing the back of his neck in thought. "I guess I'd have to say junior year, when I was at Antoine-Girouard. I had to go through the first year 'hazing' stuff even though I was older than most of the other guys coming in. The worst of it was when I had to approach a girl out on the quad, wearing just my jock strap and cup. Mind you, this is September in Quebec, and its pretty damn cold. I had to talk to her and act like nothing was out of the ordinary. She laughed so hard at me that I had nightmares for weeks about it. I'd wake up sweating and freaking out that I was naked in a cold room with every girl in the world laughing at me."

"Well that's enough to give a guy a complex," she giggled.

"You're telling me!" Edward laughed. "Alright, my turn. You tell me about yours."

"Oh, no, no, no. I don't think so. That is definitely a moment I'd care to never think about again."

"So you're using your _one _pass on this one?"

"Yes, I'm passing. There is absolutely no need to relive my most embarrassing moment. Not now, not ever!" she laughed.

"Okay fine. I'll give you another question, but I have to answer, okay?"

"Yes, I know the rules of the game, Edward."

"Alright… tell me about the guy that hurt you so badly."

Bella's face went white.

"I know it's hard for you to talk about him baby, but you're going to have to tell me about him eventually. Besides, you already passed." He nudged her shoulder gently and gave her a reassuring smile.

She stared off into space for a long while before taking a deep breath and opening her mouth to speak.

"He wasn't the worst thing in the world, I guess. There are tons of other women out there who've had it worse than I did. I guess I just felt stupid for letting it happen; for letting it get to the point where I didn't recognize myself anymore.

"I'd just graduated from college and I was at a journalism conference when I met him. His name was James and he was a little older than me, good looking, and really smart. He was the youngest speaker at the conference, which was impressive, and he was immediately pretty taken with me. When he asked me to have drinks with him one night, I agreed not because I really saw him as a potential boyfriend or anything like that, but more as a potential connection to network through. As I sat there talking with him, he was such a pompous prick with his head so far up his own ass he couldn't tell which way was up anymore. But I sat there and I allowed myself to be belittled… out of _respect, _I guess. Sort of how you sort of just grin and bear it if you have a boss that you don't get along with because you know that person holds the keys to your future.

"But when I told him what my real passion was, when I told him how I felt about sports and sports media he all but called me a low-life and I'd finally had enough. It took everything I had in me not to tell him to shove it. But then he _propositioned _me and I was taken so off guard that I didn't know what to do or say. And then…" she took a deep, unsteady breath as tears welled up in her eyes.

"I knew I should have said no. I knew I should have slapped him across the face, or kicked him in the balls, or _something. _But I looked up and you were there. I mean, not actually _there _but you were on the TV in the bar. It was your first game with the Penguins; your first game winning goal. All through college, all I ever wanted was to just forget you. And just when I finally thought I had, there you were. You looked so happy and in my head all I could think about was that you were happy without me, that you never thought about me again after that night, and that I was stupid for holding on to something so trivial.

"So I let him take me away from you. Even though I knew I shouldn't and even though I knew that it would only end badly, I went to his room with him that night and I let him fuck me while I pretended it was you.

"In the morning, he wanted to have breakfast so we did. And I don't know, I guess somehow in my sick, messed up brain, I had linked the two of you together; like being with him was just like being with you. There wasn't a second that I looked at his face and didn't try with everything I had in me to picture yours.

"He went back to New York after the conference and I was… happy in some strange way, satisfied even. So when he called me a week later and told me that he'd be in Chicago, I didn't think twice about meeting up with him.

"He was just as belittling and arrogant as he'd been the last time, worse probably, but still I went back to his hotel room with him. I let him fuck me without getting anything out of it for myself, and I let him kick me out when he was finished. I went home and I thought I was happy. And when he called me again a few weeks later, it happened all over again and we eventually fell into this horrible cycle.

"He called me his girlfriend and he said he loved me. He said I was the only person who really understood him. I guess that's why I let it keep going. But I wasn't allowed to call him and I never went to New York to see him. We never talked about anything having to do with me or my life. We only ever talked about what he was doing, or what he thought about one thing or another.

"Sometimes he'd drink and he'd say some of the meanest things to me. He'd tell me about other women he'd had and how I didn't measure up. He'd tell me how pathetic I was in my job and how he was doing me a favor by letting people see me with him. When he'd sober up, he'd apologize and tell me how beautiful I was and how much he loved me, so I forgave him. But after a while, he didn't need to be drunk to say those things. And since there was no sobering up to be done, eventually there were no more apologies either.

"One day I got a call from a really angry woman. She demanded to know who I was and why her fiancé had called me so many times. She didn't have to say who her fiancé was, I knew it was James. I hung up on her and my whole world came crashing down around me. Somehow along the way I'd fooled myself into thinking that I was in love with him and that being in love meant suffering for the one you loved. I cried and cried until I'd cried every last tear I had. And then it was like the clouds parted and the sun came out and I could really take a look at my life. I saw that I'd shut my family and my closest friends out, none of them had any idea this was going on, they didn't even know James existed. I saw how completely blind I'd been to the abuse and the degradation. And I realized that I deserved so much better.

"Once I'd composed myself, I called the woman back and I told her who I was. I told her that I was sorry but her fiancé and I had been sleeping together for months. I told her I had no idea that he was engaged, which I didn't, and that I'd tell her anything she wanted to know. She cried and screamed and called me every name in the book, but I just let her get it all out. After a while we talked a little more, and we talked about how he treated her and how he treated me. I told her that even though I didn't know her, I knew she deserved to marry someone a million times better than James. She told me I deserved someone who didn't make me feel like shit, and that we both deserved someone who wouldn't lie to us.

"A day or so later, James called me very upset. He said that something terrible had happened and that he needed to see me, that I was the only place he knew he could run to. I asked him if his fiancé's house was no longer a viable option and he flipped out, saying that I ruined his life and that he hated me and that he'd ruin my career. I was scared for a minute until I realized that he had no power over me anymore. I hung up and I haven't heard from him since." Bella wiped the tears from her face and took a deep breath before letting it out slowly. "So that's my story. It took me a long time to shake all of those old feelings about myself and sometimes they come back to the surface, like they did last night, but I fight them as much as I can."

Edward turned on the sofa so that he was facing her.

"Bella, I can't tell you how sorry I am that you had to go through that. I know you know this, but I feel like I have to say it… I will never, _ever _treat you that way. All I want to do is make you happy. I love your smile too damn much to ever make you so sad. You're beautiful and smart and these last few mornings waking up next to you have made me wish I could wake up next to you every day. I can't say that I won't ever screw up again, but I will never hurt you on purpose." He pulled her into his arms and kissed her hard on the mouth as fresh tears splashed onto both of their cheeks. "I'm sorry I was such an idiot back then. I'm sorry I didn't chase after you and I'm sorry I didn't figure out a way for us to be together. If I had you'd have never given that asshole the time of day."

"It's not your fault, Ed-"she managed to sob out before he cut her off with another kiss.

"I'm taking you out tonight," he said as he pulled away and looked deeply into her eyes, "and I'm going to show you how a _real _man treats the woman he cares most about in the world."

* * *

><p>Did you enjoy reading about Edward in high school as much as I enjoyed writing it? Is that how you were expecting James to be? Please review and tell me what you think! Your feedback makes all the writing and rewriting worth it.<p>

* College Antione-Girouard is a coed high school located in Saint-Hyacinthe, Quebec, Canada.

* Blue Jays - the major league baseball team located in Toronto, Ontario, Canada.

* Mulligan - golf term for a "do over"


	15. Goodbye

So real life has really gotten in the way for me lately, not to mention this chapter was hard to write. As always, thank you all for sticking with me

**I do not own Twilight, but hot hockey players are all mine. ALL OF THEM =)**

**Playlist: Falling Slowly by The Swell Season**

* * *

><p>It was like a dream. Bella's entire world had been turned upside down and everything she'd come to understand and accept as truth had been shown to be false. A weekend with Edward had been enough to shake her completely and leave her feeling empty and forlorn at the thought of getting on a plane and flying away from a place that, after just a few short days, had come to feel just as safe and secure as her own home.<p>

Not even in her wildest and most far reaching fantasies had she ever imagined sitting at a table set for two lit by candle light with Edward, him ordering for her, in fluent French no less, and enjoying the most romantic evening of her adult life. But that is what had happened after Bella had disclosed some of the more unsavory portions of her past love life with Edward.

"I'd sort of had this planned all along. That's what the secret phone call earlier was about. But now it seems all the more appropriate and extremely necessary for me to take you out and treat you exactly the way you deserve to be treated and then some," he'd said.

Granted, while she'd been with James, having a man dote on her so completely would have seemed excessive and unnecessary, but since that ended and she'd spent time repairing her self-worth, it wasn't that she didn't think she deserved such extravagances; it was more that she just wasn't used to them. In college, her boyfriend's simply hadn't been able to afford it, and James wasn't one for romance of any kind. The mere idea of spending a small fortune on a meal, just for the sake of atmosphere and ambiance, was completely foreign to her. Of course, now that she'd established herself in her career, she could have done these types of things for herself; she just never saw the point.

And as they sat across the table from each other, hand in hand, sipping expensive wine and full of rich, decadent food, Edward said yet another thing that shook her to her foundation.

"Bella," he started softly, stroking the back of her hand with his calloused thumb. "You look absolutely beautiful tonight. These past few days have been incredible; so much more than I ever thought possible after all this time. And they have pretty much solidified what I was starting to feel before you got here. I know this is going to sound crazy and probably way too soon, but there aren't really any rules for what you and I have got going here. After all, 'by the book' isn't exactly how you and I do things."

"No, it's not," she giggled shyly.

"I care about you so much that I think that I'm… it doesn't make sense, but … I think that I'm falling in love with you, Bella," he said in a rushed, blur of words.

A soft, pale pink colored her cheeks in the candle light.

"It _is_ soon, but… I think I could be falling in love with you too," she replied softly, her eyes trained on where their hands lay clasped on the table.

"Could be?" he joked, shaking her hand playfully.

"Listen, that's coming from the girl who wasn't even open to pursuing anything _at all _with you a few weeks ago. I think that's about the best that you're going to get right now," she laughed.

"Fine, fine," he chuckled. "Good enough… for now." He winked at her and she rolled her eyes back at him.

"Perhaps I can sweeten the deal just a little bit," she said over her glass of cabernet.

"Oh? How so?"

"Well… I've been thinking, even before tonight, that maybe keeping 'us' secret was a little unnecessary."

A cocky smirk crept its way across Edward's full lips. "Is that right?"

"I think if I'm just upfront and honest about it with the network, then there shouldn't be an issue. I very well could get in much _more_ trouble if we tried to hide it and we got outted by someone down the line."

"So what exactly does this mean?"

"It means, _Edward,"_ she smiled teasingly across the table. "That I'm ready to tell anyone who'll listen that you're mine and I'm yours."

He lifted her hand to his lips and placed a long, lingering kiss on her palm. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to hear that."

.~.~.~.~.~.~.

"Hey, it'll be okay. I promise," Edward whispered soothingly as he stroked Bella's long, dark hair down her back.

"I know," she hiccoughed. "I know it will. And I feel so childish saying this, but… I just don't want to go." She wrapped her arms around his neck as she buried her tear stained face in his shoulder. 'I don't want to leave you."

"So stay," he joked with a faraway smile that she couldn't see.

"I would if I could. I hope you know that."

"I do, baby," he said, placing a soft kiss on the top of her head.

They sat on a bench against a wall of the airport terminal, huddled together, trying as best they could to catch a few, last private moments before Bella had to board her flight. Edward wore a baseball hat pulled down low over his eyes, but that didn't stop the disbelieving stares, the pointing, the whispering, and the double-takes by people passing by. He had known that going out in such a densely packed public place could be problematic with his status as a local "celebrity" but he didn't care. Saying goodbye to her in his car and sending her on her way just so that he could avoid needy fans just wouldn't do. Now that she no longer had reservations about the two of them being together, he didn't care who saw him saying goodbye to the woman he loved. He did, however, hope that the beautiful, crying girl spilling her tears onto his shirt would keep the autograph seekers at bay, and so far it had.

"I'll be in Chicago for Christmas," he added, trying anything he could to brighten her mood. "You can even meet my parents if you want. Or we could just spend the holidays holed up at your place. We can put up a tree and watch A Christmas Story. And I'll buy you lots of expensive things and you can't complain about me spending money on you because its Christmas." He gave her petite frame a loving squeeze as he spoke. "Hell, I'll even demand a trade to the Blackhawks if I have to."

"No!" Bella exclaimed, suddenly pulling away from his chest to look up at him with pitiful eyes. "You can't do that. Don't even think about that. I would never ask you to… I'll be alright. _We'll _be alright."

"I know we will, beautiful," he said with a tired smile. "And you wouldn't have to ask. I'd do it if it meant being closer to you. I'd do whatever I had to."

"You won't have to do that," she sniffed, as the announcement that her flight had begun boarding echoed through the terminal.

They shared a look that said more than either of them ever could; regret, sadness, longing, happiness, and above all else… love.

"Let me know when you make it home safe," he said, pulling her into a tight, fierce hug. All she could do was nod into his chest. He held her for as long as he could bear, before he pushed her away and told her that she'd better get going.

She nodded again, this time biting her lip in a feeble attempt at keeping more tears from falling.

For the first time that day, he felt his emotions on the brink of breaking down. He felt a tightness in his chest that he'd never felt with such intensity before, and he felt like he could hardly breathe.

With the last shreds of composure he had left in him, he took a determined step forward, cupped her delicate face firmly in his hands and kissed her with everything he had.

"I love you, Isabella Swan," he choked hoarsely, his voice thick with emotion. "I've loved you since I first laid eyes on you. And I _will _see you again soon. I promise."

A feeble sob escaped her mouth as she nodded once again before pulling away to gather her things, and make a speedy retreat toward the gate.

.~.~.~.~.~.

Bella sat back in her seat with a sigh as she stared out the porthole window. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't shake the feeling that she was leaving a piece of herself behind. And perhaps she was; the piece of her heart that she'd guarded so fiercely since whatever semblance of a relationship she had had with James had ended now belonged to Edward. But she was stubborn and despite her admission to Edward the night before, she hadn't wanted to make any dramatic declarations as she was walking away. It was too cliché, she thought, but really underneath it all, what it boiled down to was that it felt too exposed, too vulnerable. She'd barely been able to admit her feelings to herself, let alone Edward, and it was too much to let God and everyone at the airport see how badly her heart was hurting. Not to mention, the "L" word still felt foreign on her tongue even though it seemed so easy for Edward to say.

She wanted to be able to say the words as easily as he did. She wanted it so badly she could taste it, but her brain hadn't quite let her heart have free rein just yet. But as the last few traitor tears escaped her eyes, she decided that just because her mouth had a hard time forming the words, it didn't mean that _words_were beyond her reach altogether.

She quickly retrieved her laptop from her carryon bag just before the plane pulled back from the gate and began taxiing the runway.

From: Isabella Swan, Staff Writer  
>To: EACullen6<br>Date Sent: Mon, December 6, 6:22 P.M.  
>Subject: Things I can't say<p>

Edward,

I'm stubborn, which I'm sure you've gathered already. So stubborn, in fact, that I can't even bring myself to say all of the things I really wanted to say to you while I had the opportunity to say them.

You know where I come from now and you know what issues and baggage I'm dealing with. What I'm not sure you've realized yet is just how deeply what I've been through has affected me. It is ingrained in me now and I have no idea how to change it. My inability to let my guard down completely is what prevented me from telling you all of this face-to-face. But I'm going to try to change, Edward, I promise. All that being said, even though I can't bring myself to look in your eyes and tell you all of this right now, at least I use the only thing that has never failed me; the written word.

I told you last night that I _could _be falling in love with you. The truth is I already have; so hard, and so fast that it scares the shit out of me. As I'm sitting here on the plane, the further I get from you, the harder it gets to breathe. But that's stupid, of course, I know, logically, that I can breathe just fine. My brain tells me to stop being ridiculous, that I'll be fine when I get home, and that things will go back to normal. But my heart tells me that I won't feel whole again until I'm back in your arms. I go back and forth between which one I want to believe because I want to go back to the life that I know is safe, and routine, responsible but I also want that joy and happiness and sheer blissful abandon that my friend Angela and her husband have. They have a kind of love that most people can only dream of and it makes me jealous.

I can't deny the fact that I think about you day and night. When my phone rings or when it notifies me of a new email or text, I get this indescribable feeling in my stomach, this little rush of excitement that it might be you. I watch your games on TV just to feel close to you and I get so excited when you score, and I want so badly to be able to throw my arms around you at the end of the night and tell you how proud of you I am. But I can't, and it kills me.

And the more I think about it, the more I let myself think about "us", the more I _allow_ myself to imagine a future with you in it, it suddenly hit me that _I_ could have what Angela and Ben have staring me right in the face but I'm too damn hardheaded to embrace it.

The other day at the hospital, I saw you being so sweet to that little girl and for the first time in my adult life I actually entertained the thought have having kids of my own. And when I picture it in my head a see a little girl or boy with brown hair like mine and green eyes like yours. (I hope I haven't found the one subject that might actually scare you ;).)

I say all of this not to make you think that I'm ready to walk down the aisle and settle down with a bunch of kids right now, because believe me, I'm definitely not. What I mean is that even though it's an issue I struggle with daily, I want you to know that I'm ready and willing to see where this goes. I know and understand that with the greatest risk comes the greatest reward, and the greatest reward I can think of is _you_.

I love you, Edward Cullen, and to use your own words back on you, I have since the first time I laid eyes on you. What you and I have doesn't come along everyday and even though as a general rule, I don't believe in fate, I think someone out there brought us back together and I think they're trying to tell us that we should use this second chance we've been given to the fullest. Well, more specifically _I _should use it to the fullest. _I _should stop being stupid and scared and just let myself do and feel what comes naturally. And being in love with you Edward, feels as natural as breathing.

Please bear with me if I can't say the words right now, but now you know the truth.

- Bella.

She closed her laptop just as the plane began to make its final decent. It seemed unfair that a mere 40-minute flight could take her so far away from where she wanted to be so badly. But as the pilot gave the all clear to disembark, Bella took a deep breath and prepared herself for a new and unfamiliar phase in her life.

* * *

><p>So... I know we were all dreading this coming but we're back to reality now :(. We'll have to see how things shake out once life returns to normal.<p>

As always, I absolutely love your reviews and let's be real, Bella needs a little positive reinforcement after all this, don't you think?

As a side note, I have to say that there was a LONG period of time that I didn't read any fics because there just weren't any that I found that really caught my attention but all that has changed lately and I've found a couple of stories and authors that I'm absolutely in love with. 1- **Coming Home by Sarge's Girls **( fantastic collaboration between drotuno & JenRar) 2- **The Agreement by GemGirl65 **and 3- anything written by **Shahula. **

Go check them out, I promise you'll thank me! In the meantime, click that review button and tell me what you think and don't forget to check out the updated links to the playlist on my profile.


	16. What drama?

So... yeah.

Hi.

I know it has been forever and a day since I've updated, but unfortunately some tough things in my real life have prevented me from writing as much as I'd really like to.

I have not abandoned this story; I love it too much to do that. However, the damn hockey lockout isn't exactly helping me with inspiration!

Enough talking, lets get down to it.

**I do not own Twilight, but hot hockey players are all mine. ALL OF THEM =)**

**Playlist: Obsolete by Mute Math**

* * *

><p>Edward didn't have to wait for his alarm to go off Tuesday morning; he'd been awake since just before the sun had come up. After having another one of his usual dreams, and without Bella curled into his side the way she had been the last few nights, he simply couldn't shake the nagging feeling that her entire visit had been a figment of his imagination. After a while of his brain running at warp speed, he finally grabbed his phone and reread the email she had sent him.<p>

She'd really been there. She really loved him. I was all true.

He let out an exhausted sigh and sank back into the bed that still smelled of her skin. It wasn't until he heard his neighbors outside scraping the ice from their cars to go to work that he realized that he'd just been lying there, barely dozing, with his phone still gripped tightly in his hand as if it were his only connection to her.

_Get a grip, _he thought to himself as he pulled on his sweats to get ready for practice. _She didn't forget you in eight years; she's not going to forget you in a day. _

Edward normally considered himself an intelligent, rational guy, but Bella, and his fixation on her, made him crazy and sometimes question his sanity.

He figured he might have felt differently if he'd been able to talk to her after she'd gotten back home. He had barely arrived back home himself before his phone chirped with a new email notification. While sitting in the driveway of his condo, he read her confession; that she loved him and that she really wanted to be with him, and the words on the tiny, little screen made him feel like he was on top of the world. But a short while later, after he'd sent her a text asking if she'd made it home safely, his only reply had been a clipped 'yes', followed by a hurried explanation that she apparently had a mountain of work waiting for her that she had to get a start on that night before going into the office the next morning. Feeling slightly deflated, Edward tried not to take her response personally; he knew she was dealing with a lot and he knew that she had the daunting task of coming clean about their relationship to her boss ahead of her. Of course she would be on edge.

An hour or so later, his phone buzzed again.

_I'm sorry if I came across as rude before. I wasn't expecting to come back to such a mess. I'm really going to have to hunker down and get through as much of this stuff as I can tonight. And as much as I know you and I should probably talk, since I'm SURE you've checked your email by now, I know I won't be able to focus if we do. Rain check? Love you. _

Placated for the moment, Edward grabbed a beer and headed upstairs to shower before heading to bed.

Now, with a bright sunny morning laid out in front of him as he drove to the practice rink, he tried as best he could to be thankful for the time that he'd had with her and the promise of more time in the future. He took a deep breath as he crossed the bridge over the Monongahela River and made a conscious decision that he wouldn't have any more nightmares, and he would focus on the positives that had come about in the last several weeks. He was no longer some poor, wayward, love-sick soul; in the end he'd gotten the girl and all that stood between them was a few hundred, manageable, miles.

As he drove, he let his mind wander to off-seasons spent in Chicago, Bella being welcomed by his parents with open arms, surprising her at the office for an impromptu lunch date, and various other scenarios he'd never allowed himself to fantasize about before.

When he walked through the doors at South Pointe, Emmett was the first to notice his demeanor.

"Still christmas-treeing, huh Cullsy?" he asked with his trademark wide smile. "I thought you'd be a moody bitch today. Guess some residual of your girl's visit is still hanging around. It's a good thing, if you ask me; I don't want to deal with your whining all the way to Phoenix"

.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

Eighteen.

The number of stories Bella had to complete in just over 24 hours. How such a backlog of work had managed to pile up in her very brief absence was beyond her.

_I guess it's a good thing I slept well while I was at Edward's because I won't be sleeping again anytime soon, _she thought derisively. Nevertheless, she fact-checked, made phone calls, watched archived video footage, and typed away in her best effort to reach her deadline on time. _I'll be damned if I let whatever Riley's playing at put a black mark on my reputation. _

When she'd arrived home Monday evening, Bella had been less than surprised to see several new assignments sitting expectantly in her email inbox. What she hadn't expected was for the assignments to just keep coming as the night went on. Just when she thought she'd finished one, another would pop up to replace it. The sheer volume of the tasks in front of her was so overwhelming that she thought very seriously about just throwing in the towel altogether, but soon thought better of giving in to what she was sure was some ploy by Riley to break her down. Instead she redoubled her focus on her work and only turned out a product that met her own impossibly high standards. She couldn't even spare a moment to talk to Edward when he'd texted her to ask if she'd made it home safely. Without even realizing she'd done it, she had completely blown off her new boyfriend, fresh on the heels of the biggest declaration of her life. By the time it dawned on her what she'd done, she immediately tried to explain and make Edward see that she wasn't intentionally ignoring him but that he was just too good at distracting her and she needed all the focus she could get. He seemed to understand, though she was sure her explanation didn't exactly make him happy, not that she could really blame him.

When she arrived at the office the next morning, after a night of very little sleep, she kept her nose to the grindstone and continued to work diligently at her tasks, even as more came in.

"Hey Bella, welcome back!" Jessica said brightly as she practically skipped into Bella's office carrying Bella's usual cup of English tea. "How was your trip?"

"The trip was great," she replied with a sigh. "It's the coming back the fucking sucks. Pardon my language."

Jessica smiled knowingly. "I'd have told you it was coming if I'd had any advanced notice myself. I didn't know what Mr. St. James was up to until late last night. And by then I figured you probably already knew."

"So it _was_ him? You're sure?"

"Of course, who else would it be? I'm not sure how he did it though. I mean, the only way I can think of is that he put some sort of delay on the system that divvies out the assignments. I know that can be done because I had to do it when Mike had his knee surgery last fall and he didn't want to be assigned anything while he was out recovering. When I saw how many you got hit with all at once, I checked the system and sure enough, Riley authorized them. But somehow he managed to change the 'assigned on' dates, so from an outsider's perspective, it just looks like you've gotten really far behind," the bubbly blonde explained.

"Well great. This is just _perfect_," Bella fumed. "If I can't get all of this done in time, it'll look like I'm in over my head."

"Listen," Jessica said in a hushed tone, "I know you can do this. Riley St. James is an ass but don't you let his bruised ego go and ruin the good thing you've got going here _and_ in Pittsburgh, okay? Karma's a bitch; what goes around comes around."

Bella pushed her glasses on top of her head and pinched the bridge of her nose before sighing in resignation.

"You're right Jessica, I _can _do this. I'm _going _to do this."

"'Atta girl. I'll keep the caffeine coming," she said with a wink before gliding out of the office and shutting the door behind her.

The hours wore on and eventually new assignments stopped coming in to replace the ones she'd completed. Finally seeing the list start to get shorter was the best motivation she could imagine. As promised, Jessica kept Bella fresh with tea and sodas, even depositing a chicken salad sandwich from her favorite deli down the block on her desk midway through the day. _I really need to do something nice for that girl, _she thought with an appreciative smile.

What seemed like only moments later, Bella heard some of the others in the office bidding each other good night, but she just continued to work, pounding away at the keys of her computer until her fingers were sore. And still she worked until all the lights on the floor were out but her own.

At 11pm, one hour shy of her deadline, after having barely eaten or slept since she'd returned to Chicago, Bella slumped back in her desk chair, exhausted but finished.

.~.~.~.~.~.~.

After her initial return, weeks went by and Bella couldn't help but notice how the number of assignments being thrown at her were steadily increasing over what she was used to, pre Riley debacle. Her time had become so consumed with just keeping her head above water that her initial intention of telling Mike about her relationship with Edward kept getting postponed time and time again. Things around the office in general had changed as well; Riley no longer paid friendly visits to her office (not that she was really missing them), and there was just a general air of tension amongst everyone on the floor. Even Mike noticed the general feeling of unrest that seemed to have fallen over everyone and called a staff meeting late Wednesday afternoon before dismissing the staff for the long Thanksgiving weekend.

"Listen team, something's not right around here and it hasn't _been _right for a little while now. I want you all to use this time off to visit with your families, relax, and regroup. When we report back Monday, I want this office to be humming along like a well-oiled machine; like we were a few weeks ago. Now, I don't know what changed for everybody, but it doesn't matter. What matters is that we focus on the fact that we all have a job to do, regardless of what's going on in your personal life. And if we don't do our jobs to the standard the higher-ups expect, there is always someone who will. Now, I'm not threatening anything; everyone's job is secure. I just want you all to know that I've noticed things slipping. And if I've noticed, then I'm sure other, more important people have too. I really hate to be such a downer before a holiday, but please take what I'm saying to heart. Times are tough out there, and none of us can afford to get complacent, okay?"

A general mumble of agreement could be heard around the conference room.

"Alright, have a happy and safe holiday everyone," he said, with the most convincing smile he could muster. "Oh and Bella, would you mind sticking around for a minute? There was something I wanted to talk to you about privately."

She swallowed thickly and nodded.

After everyone else had filed out of the conference room, Mike motioned for Bella to follow him down the hall back to her office.

"Bella, you know I consider you a friend, right?" he said after shutting the door behind them with a soft click.

"And I consider you a friend as well," she replied back with a smile that she hoped didn't convey how apprehensive she felt on the inside.

"Good, I'm really glad to hear you say that. And I hope that we're good enough friends that you could come to me and tell me if something was bothering you or if there was something going on outside of the office that I should know about." His ice blue eyes looked back at her from his handsome, boyish face and seemed to penetrate right through her.

She leaned against the corner of her desk and sighed.

"There is something I've been meaning to talk to you about, actually. There just hasn't been a good time to bring it up; things have been so crazy around here lately I never knew how or when to even bring it up because it has to do with something personal."

"Look Bella, you don't have to say anything else. I'm not taking sides here, and frankly, I'm really not one to talk given my own situation that is bordering on inappropriate, but I want you to know that I won't ask any questions. The particulars aren't any of my business, but whatever drama is going on between you two needs to stay at home. I'm not saying that what's going on is the source of the tension around here, but I'm sure it hasn't helped alleviate it either. I just want everyone to get along and do the caliber of work that I know we're capable of. Okay?"

Bella stared back at him in complete and utter confusion, her brain trying desperately to wrap itself around what he'd just said. She opened and closed her mouth several times before finally rediscovering her ability to form words. "What in the _hell_ are you talking about? Drama between me and _who _needs to stay at home?"

"You and Riley," he said in a tone that sounded just as confused as she felt.

"_What drama_ between me and Riley? I've barely said two sentences to him since my vacation!"

"You two aren't… dating? Err… seeing each other… romantically?"

"No! Why on Earth would you think we were?"

"He told me a while back that he had asked you out on a date and that you'd said yes. Tempers started running high right around the same time so I just assumed that maybe things had soured between you. So, is that not what happened?" he asked, the lines on his forehead growing deeper by the second.

"_Yes, _he asked me to have dinner with him. And _yes, _I initially agreed. However I told him the next day that I didn't think it was appropriate plus I'd just recently started seeing someone. _That _is what I wanted to talk to you about."

She pushed her glasses up on top of her head and raked her hands down her face in exasperation.

"I'm sorry, I just assumed that… well, you know. Maybe things hadn't worked out the way you'd wanted them to and now you were avoiding each other or something."

"_I _never wanted it to work out _any _way. Riley _was _a nice guy but 'no' is apparently not an answer he hears very often. He's been acting like a child ever since."

"Bella, I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have assumed. But thing have been a little _off, _between you two lately, right?"

"Yes, they have. I certainly won't deny that. Ever since I pretty much _un_acceptedhis offer, I feel like he's been doing everything he can to sabotage me. I'm just about to my wit's end, Mike. I don't know how much more of this shit I can take. I used to absolutely _love _to come to work but now… now I dread walking through those doors because I have no idea how much crap is going to get tossed my way on any given day."

"I really don't want you to feel that way. You know how much we depend on you around here; how much _I _depend on you. Do you want me to talk to Riley?"

"No…yes…no… I don't know," she sighed. "I just want things to be like they were when we were all friends and we just got along. And if I'm being completely honest, I want to stop getting the raw end of the deal when it comes to new assignments."

"What do you mean?"

"You can't tell me you haven't noticed how many story assignments I've been getting. I have literally dozens to take care of each week; at least three times as much work as I had before I went out of town. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not at all opposed to working hard but it has been really getting out of hand. I just want things to be fair, that's all."

"I'm sorry, that's my fault. If I had been paying closer attention to the system, I'd have seen what was going on a long time ago. And I should have known something was up when Riley asked me for access a while back. I was too caught up in _my own_ personal situation to really notice."

"Jessica?" Bella asked, the tiniest hint of a smile curling at the edges of her lips.

"Yeah…" Mike's cheeks flamed red. "She said she'd told you that we were uhh… slightly more the just coworkers."

"She did, and if you want that to just stay between us then that's where it will stay. Just please know that the same cannot be said about myself and Riley."

"Understood completely. So what is it that you'd been meaning to talk to me about?"

"Well… the reason I said no to Riley is because I'd recently started seeing someone else," she started. "And that someone is Edward Cullen."

"_Really_? I thought you said that you guys were—"

"Just friends, I know. We sort of were when I said that. At least we hadn't really put any labels on what we were at the time. But… now we have, and I don't want to hide who I'm with out of fear of what the network might think any more. I thought, or well, I hoped, that if I just came out with it that you and the network, hell, maybe even Riley, would be a little bit more understanding than if it just _came out_ at some point in the future."

"Bella, you never had to hide it," Mike said, crossing the room and putting his hands on her shoulders. "I'm happy for you. Cullen's a real stand-up guy. But I'm glad you told me so we can make arrangements so that work and personal don't really intersect much for you. That way, nobody has anything to say. And if somebody has a problem, then they can talk to _me _about it."

Bella felt the sting of fresh tears behind her eyes.

"You have no idea how much of a weight off my shoulders it is to hear you say that," she choked.

"You're the best reporter and best writer I've ever had on staff, B. Don't worry about something trivial and silly like what somebody else thinks of who you're dating get in the way of how awesome you are. Your work stands on its own."

Swollen tears of relief rolled down her cheeks as she closed her eyes and took a deep, calming breath.

"Thank you so much, Mike. Really."

"Would it be okay if I hugged you? I feel like you could probably use one right now," he said with a joking laugh. She laughed as well and nodded before being wrapped up in a warm, tight bear hug against Mike's chest. "Now go home and enjoy the long weekend, got it? Come Monday things are going to be very different around here."

* * *

><p>Yay! It took her a little while, but Bella came out with it. They're not out of the woods yet though.<p>

Review, review, review! Please! Tell me how awesome it is to see me update again after a millenia. Tell me how pissed off you are because I took so long. Tell me your best hockey story. Hell, tell me your best joke. I don't care! Just click the little button and make my day.

Also... a few chapters back, I said in an a/n that the dream Edward had with Bella at a bar was an allusion to a oneshot I wrote for Fandom for Texas. Several people inquired about it, but FFn was being dumb for a while and I couldn't get it out to many of you who wanted it. So! If you're still interested, please PM me your email and I'll be more than happy to send it your way.


	17. All The Time

Life got in the way. Again. ...sigh...

**I do not own Twilight, but hot hockey players are all mine. ALL OF THEM =)**

**Playlist: Little Talks by Of Monsters and Men**

* * *

><p>As she watched Mike retreat from her office, Bella sank back into her desk chair and let out a long sigh of relief. She hadn't felt this light and free of burden in weeks and she couldn't wait to tell Edward the good news. She checked her watch before deciding that he'd probably be on the plane with the team but decided to attempt to reach him by text. She was too excited to wait until he landed back in Pittsburgh.<p>

_All clear :) _She typed out quickly as she set about shutting her computer down and gathering her coat.

**_All clear meaning…? _**He responded a few minutes later.

_I talked to Mike. He knows about us and we're all clear._

**_So I'm no longer your secret lover then?_**

_Nope, you're my public lover now. _

_**Baby, you know better than to give me ideas like that**. _

_No I don't ;) _

**_Remind me again why I'm on an airplane full of hairy guys and you're somewhere miles down below instead of here with me right now?_**

_Because you're a sports icon and I'm just a lowly reporter. Besides, I don't think I'd want to be on the hairy man plane with you. They get to see you naked enough as it is and what I'd like to be doing right now requires a certain level of privacy, if you know what I mean. _

**_There's always the bathroom. _**

_Why Mr. Cullen, are you propositioning me to join the Mile High Club with you? _

_**Airplane bathroom; Number 29 on the list of 101 places I want to make you mine**. _

_I'm already yours, now it's just public knowledge. _

**_And I'm yours. That doesn't mean I wouldn't give my right arm to have you naked and on my lap right now. _**

_Good to know, but I'd rather you kept both of your arms intact. All the better to hold me down with ;)_

_**That's it; I'm hijacking this plane with a butter knife and landing it on the roof of your building**._

_Try to stay out of prison, okay? Conjugal visits aren't really my thing._

_**Duly noted**. _

_Save it until we can see each other again, tiger. _

_**Oh that's cute, you think I haven't been jerking off every chance I get thinking about you**. _

_Lol it hadn't occurred to me, actually. _

_**Believe me. All. The. Time**. _

_Seriously?_

_**You have no idea**. _

_I'm flattered, I think. _

**_Who else would I fantasize about?_**

_Some porn star, I guess._

_**I'd much rather make a few movies with you, beautiful**. _

_Is that so?_

**_Oh yes. In fact, now I think I know what will be occupying my thoughts as soon as I get away from the guys. Me, taking pictures of that incredible body of yours spread out on my bed. It's making me hard right now just thinking about it._**

_Calm it down. I don't want Emmett to get any ideas. ;)_

_**Emmett I can handle**. **It's you that makes me nervous**. _

_Me? I don't bite. _

**_Yes you do. I've got the teeth marks on my shoulder to prove it!_ **

_Oops ;)_

_.~.~.~.~.~._

With his day off for the holiday, Edward started the morning off by sleeping late. Though his internal alarm clock roused him at a decent hour more often than not, this morning he was too occupied with much different dreams than he was used to; dreams that made him very reluctant to leave unconsciousness.

Instead of his recurring nightmare of seeing college Bella at the bar with another man, this time, when he saw her standing at the bar with her back to him, he strode confidently up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. She sighed and relaxed into his body before turning and throwing her arms around his neck.

"I love you," she mouthed over the hum of the bar, and he bent down to kiss her. The next thing he knew, the two of them were alone on his bed, her long, dark hair fanned out across plush pillows beneath them. She was his for the taking and his body craved a connection with hers.

He allowed his mouth to explore every inch of her skin, all barriers between them melting away as he blazed a path. Every sigh, moan, and undulation urged him further until there wasn't a single part of her that wasn't burning for him.

"Edward," she sighed, her voice a deep, husky whisper. "Please… I need you."

"You have me," he whispered in response before sinking into her completely. She let out a high, keening cry of pleasure that made him feel more powerful than he'd ever felt in his entire life.

"More…" she moaned. "Don't stop," as her lips grazed his ear and her fingers wound tightly into the hair at the base of his neck.

"Never," he growled.

"Knock _knock_!" a distant, sing-song voice interrupted the euphoric symphony that was Bella's sex noises. "Mr. Cullen? Are you home?"

He groaned and rolled clumsily out of bed and shuffled toward his bedroom door.

"Hello? Mr. Cull—" but the woman stopped short when he abruptly flung the door open.

"Yes Lauren, I'm home. I know you usually start up here, but if you wouldn't mind starting with the basement this morning, I'll just grab a shower and be out of your hair shortly."

"Uhh… I umm… I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you," the cleaning woman stammered as her cheeks flamed crimson.

"No, no, its fine. I needed to get up anyway," he replied with a rake of his hands down his face and into his unruly hair.

"Well… I guess I'll just… I'll just get started then," she mumbled before making a hasty retreat down the stairs.

_Weird, _he thought. _She's not normally so jumpy. _

"Actually Lauren," he said, interrupting her escape. "It's thanksgiving. What are you even doing here? Go home to your family and I'll just see you next week, ok?"

"Oh… o-okay. Thank you, Mr. Cullen. Next week." She dipped her head and kept her eyes averted toward the floor as she backed down the stairs and out of sight.

He reclosed the bedroom door and shuffled lazily into the bathroom and what he saw in the mirror explained Lauren's behavior completely. Staring back at him was the tented front of his flannel pajama bottoms; a single button straining to hold the opening closed to conceal his raging hard on.

"Oh Bella's going to _love _hearing about this," he laughed to his reflection.

.~.~.~.~.~.~.

"Things are getting…I don't know… _serious, _I guess," Jasper said over thanksgiving dinner at the Sullivan house.

"How serious?" Emmett asked with a cocked eyebrow, mouth full.

"Emmett, seriously? You're as bad as the kids. Chew your food," Charlotte sighed with an exaggerated eye roll. "I didn't spend all day in the kitchen just to have this nice meal fly out of your mouth and splatter all over my table."

"Sorry Char," he said sheepishly.

Jasper grinned before continuing. "We've talked about the idea of staying in town and spending Christmas together, just the two of us," he replied, his light blue eyes falling to his plate.

"What the fuck, Jazz?!" the perpetual bachelor exclaimed, banging his water glass on the table.

"Emmett!" Charlotte admonished while the Sullivan children snickered behind their napkins.

"_Sorry Char_, but really, dude, you can't be serious! You've known this girl for all of five minutes!"

"I am," Jasper said, lifting his head with a new wave of confidence and looking his goaltender squarely in the eye. "Alice means a lot to me and all I really want right now is to be with her."

"Have you told your parents yet?" Charlotte asked gently.

"No, but they'll just have to understand." He frowned at the double helping of turkey and stuffing that lay untouched on his plate. "I know it probably seems crazy but I guess sometimes you just… know. I don't even know _what _I know yet, but I know _something._ Edward, help me out here."

The forward, who had up to this point remained silent, stared back at his friend.

"I say do whatever you want, man. I know right now I'd sure as hell rather be with Bella than just about anywhere else, so I can't say I blame you for wanting to spend the holidays with Alice."

Emmett sat back away from the table and threw his arms up into the air.

"For crying out loud, has everybody around here lost their damn minds?"

"I think it's sweet, you and Alice," Charlotte beamed across the table. "She makes you happy and that's all that matters. Just be prepared for the consequences if you two actually go through with it. I know I'd be pretty upset if my daughter opted not to come home for Christmas to spend it with a guy she'd only been seeing for a short time." Cassie, the oldest Sullivan child, giggled. "So don't get any ideas," she said to her daughter with a conspiratorial grin.

"What _are_ you and Bella going to do for the holiday? Have you two talked about it?" Peter asked.

"Uhh… no. I know my parents would like for me to come home, but I'm pretty sure they've already ruled that out since we have a game on the 26th. Things have been a little hectic with Bella's job lately so we haven't had much of an opportunity to talk it over."

"Well whatever you decide, you know you're always welcome here with us; Bella too, if she's with you," the team captain said with a smile. "You too, Emmett, but no unexpected _guests _this time_, _okay?"

"Yeah yeah, I know. Listen that only happened the _one_ time and it was only because I lost track of what day it was. And I had to deal with obsessive phone calls and texts for two months after that. Jeez, you'd think a girl could take a hint." Emmett shoveled a heaping forkful of mashed potatoes into his mouth for emphasis.

Charlotte leaned across the table and laid her hand over her daughter's. "Cassie, honey, I'm glad you're hearing this now. Red flag number one; if the boy you're dating can't figure out a calendar, he's probably not the one for you."

"Oh ha ha, very funny," Emmett scoffed. "Look, I'm a dog, okay? I admit it. But at least I don't pretend to be something I'm not. And no Cass; a guy like me is definitely not the guy for a sweet girl like you. But there are plenty of not-so-sweet girls out there who need a little time and attention too."

"How charitable of you," Jasper laughed.

"Just call me Mother _effing _Teresa."

.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

"So," Edward yawned into the phone. "How was your Thanksgiving?"

"It was great. Angela is an amazing cook, of course. And her parents were in town along with Ben's, so it was nice to have a little bit of parental interaction, even if it wasn't with my own."

"Yeah, you had originally planned on going home, right? What changed your mind?"

"With everything that was going on with Riley, I thought the long holiday weekend would be a great way for me to go back to Forks and enjoy some time with my dad, a little small town anonymity, and just escape for a while. But apparently a few weeks ago, my dad finally worked up the nerve to ask his longtime friend, Sue Clearwater out for coffee. She said yes, and they've been pretty inseparable ever since. My dad isn't much of a cook so Sue asked if he wanted to spend the holiday with her and her family. When I talked to my dad about me going home, he said I was welcome to come over to Sue's as well, but I didn't want to encroach on their little honeymoon period. Plus, Sue's son was a few years behind me in school and he was always a sweet kid, but a little creepy. I think he may have had a bit of a thing for me back in the day and I've had quite enough of that for a while, thank you very much."

"Well, I'm glad you had a good day, babe," he mumbled groggily.

"I wish we could have spent it together but we knew things like this were inevitably going to happen," she said without thinking.

"Doesn't have to," he said through a thick yawn.

"Oh?"

"There's always Christmas."

Bella fumbled over her words, not entirely sure how to interpret what she thought he might be suggesting. She definitely wanted to see him, but she wasn't sure she was ready for this just yet.

"Oh well… I thought I might see you over Christmas if you were coming back to see your parents but…"

"Come on, Bella. You can't really be that surprised that I'd want to spend Christmas with my girlfriend, can you?" he chuckled. "I can't go to my parent's; we have a game the next day and the travel would be too much of a pain in the ass. But _you _could come to _me _and let me spoil you for a couple days."

"I don't need spoiling—"

"Doesn't mean I don't want to do it," he interjected.

Bella felt her cheeks warm and an involuntary smile tug her lips up at the corners.

"So you're going to make _me_ brave the hellacious holiday travel scene? Busy airports, crying babies, and all that?"

"Oh come on, baby." His voice dropped to the warm molten honey tone that sent chills down her spine. "I'll make it worth your while."

She stretched across her bed as her smile spread further across her face.

"Let me think about it, okay?"

"Take all the time you need, but you and I both know what you really want," he said, his voice thick and husky. "It's the same thing I want."

"Good night, Edward," her voice waivered slightly as she tried her best to keep the giddy excitement from slipping into her tone.

"Good night, beautiful."

Bella's heart thrummed wildly in her chest. It was incredible to her how such simple words from him could illicit such an enthusiastic response from her without her even giving it a second thought. She chewed her bottom lip through her permanent smile, which she fought with all her might, and analyzed the meaning behind every butterfly in her stomach.

_It's perfectly normal to get excited when he says he wants you to come visit him. _

_But isn't spending Christmas together sort of putting the cart before the horse? We're already moving forward at a mile a minute as it is. This isn't normal. _

_What difference does 'normal' make anyway? We've already proven that what we're _supposed _to do and what Edward and I _actually _do don't always make sense on paper, but somehow it just works. _

_What about Charlie? How will he feel if you don't come home for Thanksgiving _or _Christmas? __He probably will barely notice. He's happy to just spend time with his special someone, just like _you _should be. _

After several long minutes alone with her conflicting thoughts, she finally picked up her phone and dialed Angela's number.

"You didn't get enough of me for one day, huh?" her best friend answered, sleepily.

"Oh come on, you know I can never get enough of you, Ang."

"Flattery will get you everywhere, Swan," she laughed. "What's up?"

"I just talked to Edward."

"And?"

"And he wants to spend Christmas together."

"That's awesome! What did you tell him?" she gushed, suddenly excited and no longer sounding sluggish at all.

"I told him I'd think about it."

"Alright Bella, this has gone on long enough," she said sternly.

"The boy _loves _you; he goes out of his way time and time again to prove it to you. There is no reason why you should be fighting this anymore."

"I know Ang, but I just… I don't know how to be somebody's girlfriend. I don't know how to be _his _girlfriend. I can't shake this feeling that suddenly the other shoe is going to drop and I'm going to be left picking up the pieces he's left behind."

Angela sighed from the other end of the line.

"Remember I'm saying this to you because you're my best friend in the entire world and I love you but you've got to stop being such a pussy about this! That fear? It never goes away. Hell, Ben could walk out on me any day if he really wanted to, but I have faith that what we have is strong enough to keep that from happening. It's not always picnic and you can't expect it to be. The fear is what makes what you and Edward are doing exciting and fun! If you let what terrifies you most hold you back from possibly achieving the greatest happiness of your life, then what's the point of living? If you insist on living in fear then you may as well go crawl into a hole and die. Because, I hate to break it to you, kid; life is scary.

"Now I'm not saying that Edward is your 'one true love' or anything nearly that grandiose and romantic, but he _could_ be. And you'll never know if you don't let yourself experience what's happening all around you. "So I say you visit him for Christmas and who knows? Maybe you'll finally get over yourself and _actually _stop worrying for five seconds andhave a good time."

"Okay but—"

"But nothing, Bella! What more do you want the guy to do? Tattoo 'property of Bella Swan' on his ass so that even the guys in the locker room know that he's off limits? Jesus girl, you're maddening sometimes, you know that? Have you even told him you love him yet?"

"I told him how I felt in the email I sent when I left Pittsburgh."

"No. Have you _told _him?" Angela's tone was laden with implication.

"Well… no. It's just… it's hard to get the words out. He knows how I feel!"

"Does he say it to you?"

"Yeah, all the time."

"Don't kid yourself into thinking he hasn't noticed the fact that you can't or won't say it back to him. Believe me, he's definitely noticed. And the fact that he still says it, the fact that he's waiting pretty fucking patiently for you to say it back is proof enough that he's worth the risk of heartbreak, Bella.

"James hurt you, I know he did. But you went through all of that for a reason and now you're stronger for it. And Edward isn't James, Bella. Edward _isn't_ James so you've _got _to stop acting like he is or his patience is going to run out and you're going to lose him."

Sometime during their conversation the tears began to flow silently down her cheeks and Bella didn't attempt to wipe them away for a long while. Her friend's words were cutting but true and she knew in her heart of hearts that Angela was right. Edward was only human; how long could he wait for her to finally come around to where he wanted her to be?

"B, I know this is hard to hear and I completely understand if you're pissed at me. But I love you, and I'd be a bad friend if I didn't give it to you straight. You and I have always had a zero bullshit policy and now is no different. I'm really tired so I'm going to go to bed. Call me whenever you feel like talking, okay? Love you."

And with that the line went dead and she was left alone with her thoughts again.

* * *

><p>I apologize for this chapter taking so long. We're at a bit of a pivotal point in the story and I had the hardest time trying to steer things in the direction I want them to go. Hopefully the next one won't take quite so long to chunk out.<p>

I hope you enjoyed, and I hope you're as excited for the hockey lockout to be over as I am!

Review!


	18. Neurotic about everything

Hello? ...echo...echo...echo... Anybody still here?

A few of you are, and for that I'm incredibly thankful and grateful.

I've been off being an adult for a while. I bought a house, I had a close family member pass away, I've been trying to change jobs. You know... just about anything that could come up to get in the way, did. But here we are, and it is my plan to get back onto at least a quasi normal updating schedule.

I do hope you enjoy, and thanks again for sticking with me!

**I do not own Twilight, but hot hockey players are all mine. ALL OF THEM =)**

**Playlist: Demons by Imagine Dragons**

* * *

><p>"I don't know, guys. It's weird. I haven't <em>really<em> talked to her in a couple days," Edward sighed as he helped hoist his equipment bag onto the trolley at the train station. "I mean, I've _talked _to her. I know she's not dead or avoiding me; she's just been… distant."

"Women; will you ever stop trying to figure them out?" Emmett laughed, heaving his own bag on top of his teammate's.

Rolling his eyes, Jasper chimed in, "And when will you stop interrupting when _adults_ are talking?" Emmett's laughter echoed in the night as he went over to join Boucher and Lafleur inside. "Cullsy, is there anything you can think of that might be bothering her? Like whatever was going on at her office maybe?" Jasper continued.

"No, that's all been resolved for the most part. And hell, I'd know if something else was going on if she'd just fucking tell me!" he growled, shoving his hands in his coat pockets and ducking his head against the wind whipping along the platform.

"She's skittish, you told me that yourself. No offense man, but do you think it could be something _you _did?"

"Me? I can't think of anything… unless she's just annoyed that I've been traveling a lot and maybe haven't had as much free time as I usually would. But that doesn't really sound like her, she knows what this life is like. She gets it."

"I don't know what to tell you then, bro," he said with a shrug.

"How about 'get comfortable' because we're staying here for a while," Emmett said rejoining them on the platform and slinging his arms around both of his teammates' shoulders. "Coach says the track is iced over. We've been delayed for at least an hour."

Grumbling, Edward and Jasper followed Emmett back inside to find a cup of coffee and get warm.

"Ho-lee shit boys," Emmett stated flatly, suddenly stopping all three of them short.

"What? What is it?" Jasper asked, looking around.

"I don't think I've ever been happier to have a delayed train in my entire life," he said with a grin as he started to swagger off in the direction of a tall, leggy blonde.

"Jesus Christ, that guy's dick is going to get him killed one day," Jasper laughed.

"Yep, especially because he has no idea what he's dealing with, with that one," he said, a slow smile spreading across his face as he jogged forward past his goaltender.

"Rose?" he called. "Rosalie Hale?"

The woman turned on her heel, her long blonde hair swinging around her slim shoulders in a graceful ring of gold.

"Edward?" she asked with a smile. "Oh my god, how are you?"

He wrapped her up in a tight hug and lifted her into the air, the toe of her expensive leather boots barely grazing the stone floor as they embraced.

"I'm great. How are you? Damn, it's so good to see you!"

"Yeah, you too. It's been way too long. It's completely on me, I've just been so busy and time got away from me. I'm sorry I haven't called or emailed," she said with a pout.

"Please, Rose. It's a two-way street. I haven't exactly been the best at keeping in touch either. But that really doesn't matter now, does it? What are you doing here?"

"I live here now," she beamed. "Well… not yet actually, but I will soon."

"Oh yeah? That's awesome!"

"Yeah, my folks wanted to expand the dealership franchise down the east coast, and they put me in charge of the newest expansion. I've got two dealerships here, two in Philadelphia, and three in Newark, New Jersey."

"Holy shit! Wow, congratulations! That's really great, Rose. I'm happy for you."

"Thanks, thanks. You… what about you? I mean, you're a big star now! That's… trippy. I get some really awkward looks from guys when I tell them we used to date," she laughed.

"Big shoes to fill, eh?" Edward chuckled, nudging her shoulder with his own.

"You wish," she laughed. "Can I buy you a cup of coffee or something? My train to New York got delayed because the track is iced over so I'll be stuck here a while."

"Sure, Jasper, Emmett and I were just on our way to find some, actually. We must be on the same train; we're headed to New York to play the Rangers tomorrow night."

"Oh, cool." She peaked around Edward's shoulder and gave a timid wave. "Hi Jasper. Hi Emm—"

Edward felt his friend quickly brush past him as he nearly tripped over his own feet to extend his hand to the beautiful blonde.

"Emmett McCarty. Very, very nice to meet you, Rosalie," he said, folding her delicate hand in his much larger ones.

"_Here we go_," Jasper mumbled under his breath.

.~.~.~.~.

"So I told him he was doing it too hard," Rosalie laughed from behind her fingers, tears welling up in her eyes and threatening to stream down her face. "But he didn't listen and the next thing I knew, she was squirting him in the face!"

The entire table erupted in laughter as Edward merely shook his head and grinned.

"It was my first time milking a cow, okay? It's not like pulling on gigantic cow nipples came second nature to me," he laughed.

"At least not back then, eh Cullsy?" Emmett joked, elbowing his teammate in the ribs.

"Oh yeah, now's a completely different story. Ass," Edward replied, landing a hard, retaliatory elbow into Emmett's side.

"Don't worry about him too much, guys. Under the proper instruction, it wasn't long before our Edward here was handling the ladies like a pro," Rose smirked across the table.

"Well, I'd like to think I had a pretty good teacher to show me the ropes," he laughed.

"So you guys really were… _you know_," Emmett asked after clearing his throat.

"We were what?" Rose pushed, rather enjoying seeing the near stranger squirm.

"You guys… I mean you and Ed… you two used to… be _a thing_?" he asked, wringing his toque between his hands.

Rose laughed and flipped her hair over her shoulder.

"Yes, Edward and I used to be _a thing_. But it was a long time ago and now we're just old friends who haven't seen each other in an absurdly long time. Isn't that right, Cullen?"

"Couldn't have said it better myself. We really shouldn't let it go this long again. Before we leave, let me make sure the number I have for you is still good and I'll call you."

Just then, a groggy but otherwise excited man in his mid-twenties nervously approached their table.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, but I'm a really big fan. Huge fan, actually. I mean, I've lived and breathed Penguins hockey since before I can remember," the man babbled.

"That's cool, man," Jasper said, rising out of the booth and shaking the man's hand. "What can we do for you?"

"The guys at work will absolutely shit if I can get a picture with you guys. Would that be cool?"

"Of course! Rose, do you mind?" Edward asked.

"Not at all," she replied brightly as they all slid out of the booth and the man handed over his phone.

Edward, Jasper, Emmett, and the excited man posed for a series of a few smiling photos before another round of handshakes sent the man practically skipping off to check the arrival board for his train.

"Hey guys," Garrett called from across the café area, "looks like the track's clear. We'll be heading out soon."

Jasper dragged a reluctant Emmett off to the platform to give Edward a moment to say goodbye to his friend.

"I promise we'll keep in touch this time," Rose stated matter-of-factly.

"Definitely. You know too many of my dirty secrets to burn that bridge," he joked. She laughed heartily before throwing her arms around his neck and hugging him tightly.

"I've missed you, Edward Cullen. I really have," she whispered in his ear before planting a chaste kiss on his cheek.

He smiled warmly and offered his arm to escort her out onto the darkened platform.

.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

The snow seemed to finally have stopped falling but even with the stillness all around her, Bella simply couldn't find sleep. Angela's words just kept rolling around in her brain, not allowing her to find the relief she so desperately wanted and needed.

It had been a few days and though she'd had several conversations with Edward, she found herself subconsciously keeping him at arm's distance. During the day while she was at work, it was easy to stay distracted enough not to think about the emotional battle that was going on inside of herself, but in the evening when it was quiet and her most deep seeded desire was just to hear his voice and let its velvety softness envelope her in its warmth, or conversely, when she had him on the phone and all she wanted was for him to stop talking and stop stroking the exposed nerve of her uncertainty – those were the times when no distraction on earth was powerful enough to draw her attention away.

She didn't want Angela to be right. She didn't want to admit to herself that the one thing that was holding her back from experiencing true happiness was her own issues and hang-ups about commitment. What she wanted more than anything was for her insecurities to be right, for her hesitations to be warranted. On some level, she wanted Edward to hurt her so that she could at least say that she'd been right all along.

_Stupid, stupid, stubborn girl. _

She squeezed her eyes shut tight and took a deep, steadying breath.

_You remember what it was like after James. You remember how it felt to be completely empty. You don't really want to go back to that just for the sake of being right, do you? _

_"_No! I don't!" she shouted in frustration to walls of her empty bedroom. "I can't keep doing this. He deserves better and so do I!"

With renewed courage and conviction she rolled across her bed to where her phone lay plugged in and resting on her bedside table.'

_Are you awake? _She texted quickly.

**_Yeah, but not for much longer if I can help it. What's up? Is everything okay?_**

_Of course, everything's fine. I just wanted to talk to you. Do you have a few minutes?_

_**For you, babe, of course I do. Let me just jump in the shower real quick before Emmett gets up to the room and hijacks it**. _

_It's okay. Don't worry about it. You should just shower and get to bed. I'm sure you're exhausted. It wasn't anything important anyway._

Bella laid the phone back down and hugged her pillow close to her chest. Not only was she insecure but she was spineless too. But after a few self-deprecating moments, she jumped when her phone rang shrilly in the darkness.

"I said it wasn't important," she whispered, doing everything she could to keep her voice from trembling.

"Bella, whatever it is, it's important to me. What's going on, baby? You seem upset. And you've been a little distant lately, is everything alright?"

"Yeah, everything's fine. I just… I miss you." A shaky laugh bubbled up from her chest and began to slowly warm her insides.

"I miss you too, babe."

"No, you don't get it. I _miss _you. I don't miss anyone. I don't _need_ anyone Edward, and right now… I_ need_ you. I can't figure it out; the more I try to resist what I feel for you, the more I can't seem to ignore it. I'm so torn between wanting to love you and be with you the way I know we both want to be and shutting you out completely and forgetting you ever existed. But I knew the moment I laid eyes on you again that I wouldn't be able to forget you again. I did a shitty job of forgetting you before anyway.

"I've been selfish and I was scared and I guess I thought that maybe if I let you in a little bit that it would be enough. And for a second, while I was there with you, it was; we were in the moment and everything was perfect. But after I got home, little by little, every quick text, every five minute phone call, made me want more. I realized what I wanted from you was something I wasn't willing to give back to you in return; I wanted your everything. And you were giving it to me so easily, and yet I was giving you nothing. It was this vicious cycle in my head of feeling guilty, then thinking it might not be so bad to let you in, to getting scared and pushing you away again.

"Since you asked me about Christmas, I've been all over the place. Deep down I want to spend Christmas with you, and every other holiday for that matter. But I'm afraid of what admitting that to myself means. I know you know what happened to me, Edward, but just because I told you why I'm so damaged doesn't mean I'm suddenly all better. That's why I haven't been myself lately. I guess it became abundantly clear that letting you in just a little bit wasn't going to cut it.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry for being such a basket case. And I…" She'd run out of things to say so she let her words linger in the air between them.

"First of all, you aren't a basket case and you sure as hell aren't damaged," he said gently. "Bella, you told me what happened, and I'm thankful that you did. I got a whole lot of insight into what's going on in your head than I ever had before. I don't necessarily 'get' it, but I understand. I wish I could explain why I'm so willing to jump off the deep end with you, but I can't. All I know is that I _miss _you too. I _need _you too, babe. I don't want you to push me away, and I'll admit, it hurts to hear you say that you have been-"

"And see, that's what I don't want! I don't know how to be a good girlfriend to you, Edward. I just don't, and I don't know how to fix it."

"Bella, do you think I'm some sort of pro at being in a relationship, or something? Because I sure as hell am not," he laughed ruefully. "I have a job that makes me travel all over the country nine months out of the year; do you really think that that's conducive to putting down roots with someone? I don't know how to be a good boyfriend to you either Bella, but right now I'm just going with what feels right. If I want to talk to you, I call you. I buy you a gift when I want to know that wherever you are, you're smiling. When I want you to know that I'm thinking about you, I send you an email, or text, or something. I don't know if any of that is what I'm 'supposed' to do. All I know is that I think about you all the time, I want you to be happy, and I want to be the one who makes you happy. Outside of that, I'm just making it up as I go along."

"You're just so much better at this than I am," she sighed, completely aware of how immature and childish her statement sounded.

"I guess that's probably because I've never been hurt before." He paused for a moment and when she let the silence extend, Edward took a deep breath and continued. "Look Bella, I play games for a living; I don't have time for them in my personal life. Maybe that's why it seems like I'm _better _at this than you are; because I love you and I don't care how that makes me look. I'm not going to beat around and bush and pretend like you're not the most important person in my life right now because I'm afraid it'll scare you off or make me look weak, or whatever."

"I… I don't want to play games. I'm not trying to…" she mumbled feebly.

"So don't! Do what you want. Do what feels right. What do you want to do for Christmas?"

"I don't know-"

"I'm not trying to push you Bella, but I think…" he sighed. "I think I need to know; yes or no? Do you want to spend Christmas with me or not?"

She sat silent for what felt like a lifetime to Edward, simply breathing and vacillating internally between what her heart wanted and what her brain thought was safe.

"I want to spend Christmas with you," she finally whispered.

"What?" he asked, unsure if he'd actually heard what he thought he'd heard.

"I want to spend Christmas with you, Edward. I want to. I'm going to book a flight in the morning. You and I are going to spend Christmas together."

"And is that really what you want? Or are you saying that because you know its what I want?"

"It's really what I want. I want to be with you all the time. I want this." The resolve in her words growing with each passing second. Edward sighed and leaned back heavily against the headboard of his expensive hotel bed.

"Good. I love you, Bella. It's okay to be scared and be nervous about us right now, but I just need you to tell me. Don't hide what you're feeling from me, okay? Please?"

"Okay…" she breathed shakily. "I'm sorry, babe. I'm so sorry. I don't mean to be so… so… neurotic about everything."

Edward let out an exhausted chuckle. "I'll figure out all of your little neuroses eventually, if you'll let me."


End file.
